Manage Career Setbacks...

 

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Emotional Intelligence & Leadership

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A Talk by S. Prakash to a Global Audience (English).

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In This Issue:

    Quotes of the Week

    Managing Career Setback

    Bookmark - How to take decisions

    Inspirational Words

    Spiritual Centre

    Story Time

    Time to Smile

    Feedback

 

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"Change Gears" eZine is a no-cost electronic newsletter dedicated to helping people be more effective and fulfilled--to be masters of change instead of victims of change. What follows are tips, strategies, quotes, resources and shortcuts to getting more done in less time and having fun in the process--to living a more productive and fulfilling life. We're always on the lookout for information to help you live and work more effectively.

 

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Quotes of the Week

"I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious." - Albert Einstein

"Don't ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive." - Howard Thurman

"A hero is someone who has given his or her life to something bigger than oneself." - Joseph Campbell

"Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts." - Winston S. Churchill

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Bookmark - How to take decisions

(Management Sutras)

Author: Shantanu Guha Ray

Kindle Version

Price: Rs.10/-

Devdutt Pattanaik is an acclaimed business thinker and strategist. His profound management sutras are derived from his bestselling books on business and management. They show how individuals can realize their potential, create wealth and achieve lasting success by following uniquely Indian principles (based on Hindu, Jain and Buddhist mythology) of goal setting, strategic thinking and decision-making.

* Drives home the principles with beautiful stories.

Short but sweet. Makes the point with simple mythological stories and relates to modern day decision making. Not boring at all and no unnecesary management jargon.

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Managing Career Setback

By Dr. LeslieBeth Wish

No matter how seasoned and successful you are, you still may experience disappointments and setbacks. Here are tips to empower you.

Read this several times:

No one is immune from experiencing career setbacks, disappointments and regrets and making mistakes big and small.

Setbacks come in many forms for all of us. See if these situations sound like you. I’ve added possible solutions for each item.

1. Inaction: “I delayed acting on something. I tend to be a thinker, but I should have trusted my instincts. Now I missed out on a great opportunity.”

Discussion and Solution: Just because you missed out on an opportunity, it doesn’t mean that you used the wrong approach. Inaction usually occurs because the risk is too high or the deadline is too tight for you to investigate. Maybe the opportunity doesn’t fit your mission. If these descriptions fit your situation, then you were probably smart in not acting. On the other hand, you might have missed out on an opportunity because you avoid risk out of fear of making a wrong decision.

The next time you face an opportunity, ask for more time. Make a list of questions or information you need to ask. Now make a two-column chart. One side has reasonable doubts, and the other side has your worst fears. Discuss your misgivings and fears with someone with business savvy.

2.Hastiness: “I shouldn’t have jumped so quickly, but I was so excited about working with Dr. Big Deal. Now I realize my involvement isn’t good after all. It’s costing me money and time! How could I have been so gullible? I should know better. I often say yes to things I shouldn’t.”

Discussion and Solution: Oh, we’ve all been seduced and flattered by someone or something that seems too good to be true. At the time, though, you felt recognized and valued. How could you pass that up? Similarly, many of us have agreed to be part of a project—and then regretted it later. Perhaps you were committing to something to help a friend or relative, and you felt you couldn’t say no.

The next time you are asked to give your time, energy—and perhaps money, first step back and ask yourself: Is this too good to be true? What will be asked of me? Do I really have the time? Do I really need to be flattered, needed and respected that much? Can I say no, even if I feel uncomfortable—or selfish? Stay focused on your career goals, values and projects. No one is going to look out for you better than you.

3. Rejection: “I can’t believe I didn’t get that contract or win that prize or be invited into this exclusive group. I’m better than Lucky Lucy.”

Discussion and Solution: There’s no question that rejection hurts—literally. Physical pain and emotional hurt share similar neural connections in the brain. Don’t wallow in negative thoughts or beat yourself up if you’ve been overlooked. Stop thinking that this chance is the only big one you’ll ever get. And maybe it is—some opportunities may not knock twice. But so what? Are you really going to devalue your effort and accomplishment because of one Big Time Rejection? There are always opportunities—including ones you create.

We all want to be valued, but make sure you know how to value yourself. To cope with rejection, get proactive. Make a list of what you’ve overcome in your life. Did you have parents who were abusive, poor or sickly, for example? Did you spend years in a bad marriage where you accepted emotional crumbs? Or were you ill?

Now make a list of all the negative thoughts about yourself that crop up during tough times. There’s no point in ignoring them. But now next to each negative thought write your rebuttal. You might say: “So I had rotten parents and was a late bloomer. Better to be late than never bloom. And look how far and well I’ve come. That took inner strength. My siblings never made it out.”

Don’t shoulder all the responsibility for not having been selected. Remind yourself that there is a good chance that these decision-makers had personal agendas and perhaps aren’t as good as their image. There are almost always hidden reasons for rejection that have nothing to do with you.

4. Bad Personal Timing: “I’m just not my best self now, and I’m not able to focus, prioritize or give it my all.”

Discussion and Solution: Even very emotionally healthy, happy and smart people go through rough patches. Life happens to everyone at some point. Yes, it’s horrible timing that just when you were hitting your stride, you had some bad things crop up.

Instead of being angry, accept that life is not fair. And there is no reason to blame you for something beyond your control. Adjust your timeline for your goals. You might also be surprised that after you’ve come through these trying times that you’ve actually changed your goals or their importance. Read again your lists of what you’ve overcome, your good qualities and your accomplishments.

5. Failure: “I blew it.”

Discussion and Solution: Yep, you did. Your plan didn’t work. You didn’t make a good impression. Well, who hasn’t messed up? Laugh, get a perspective. Learn from what went wrong. Schedule a few pity party moments, and then activate your inner value by reading your list and rebuttals again. Give up the idea that you have to be perfect to be loved, appreciated and competent. Work on tweaking your intuition. Read some books on reading people.

Hope these tips helped.

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Inspirational Words

"Worry not that your child listens to you; worry most that they watch you." - Ronald A. Heifetz

"If we had paid no more attention to our plants than we have to our children, we would now be living in a jungle of weed." - Luther Burbank

"The happiest people in the world are those who feel absolutely terrific about themselves, and this is the natural outgrowth of accepting total responsibility for every part of their life." - Brian Tracy

"The only way out is through." - Robert Frost

"All our words are but crumbs that fall down from the feast of the mind." - Kahlil Gibran

"The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved - loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves." - Victor Hugo

"A teacher who is attempting to teach, without inspiring the pupil with a desire to learn, is hammering on a cold iron." - Horace Mann

"Life shrinks or expands according to one's courage." - Anais Nin

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Spiritual Centre - Be Bold

If you happen to trace out any weakness in yourself, please think it to be mine and be bold and go on with your practice. The responsibility shall thus be shifted to me, and you shall be relieved of its effect. This is quite easy to do. Do it and watch the results.

(C) Shri. Kamlesh D. Patel - President, Shri Ram Chandra Mission - https://www.sahajmarg.org

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Story Time - Buddha Stories: The Hare in the Moon

The Bodhisattva was once born as a pious hare. One evening he was about to meditate when his eye caught the almost complete orb of the moon in the distant sky.

He remembered that the coming day was the holy fifteenth day of the brighter half of the month – the day on which one should not eat a single morsel before offering food to the guest first.

The Bodhisattva felt worried as he had no food that was good enough for a guest. After much thought, he decided to offer his body as food to anyone who may come to visit him.

Now, Sakka, the King of Gods, learning about the Bodhisattva’s resolve, appeared in the forest the next day to test his strength of character.

He took the guise of a Brahmin and pretended to be in dire need of food. Seeing the Brahmin, the Bodhisattva lit a fire by striking two stones and jumped into the raging flames.

Sakka was stunned by this act of sacrifice. The hare’s soul went up to heaven and Sakka, in his honour, adorned the moon with the hare’s image.

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Time to Smile - Life is Like That

What Does He Do Next...?

What does a basketball player do when he or she loses their eyesight?

Become a referee.

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