Making Things Right

I recently connected with a friend who is going through the painful years of seeing loved ones decline. I know what that is like, as I experienced my stepfather’s decline and my mother’s decline and their subsequent deaths in 2020 and 2021, respectively.?

Trying to “make things right” for my parents when they were declining was my way of resisting life. Busyness was a distraction. It was easier to clean out their fridge and bring over a meal rather than sit with them and witness their humanity. I kept all of the messiness of mixed emotions at bay, so that I could keep going, week after week, month after month. I refused to fully accept their transition into the unseen realm, until they were on their death bed.

It strikes me that many people do the same thing. It may be a different context--a workplace with frenetic energy or a demanding boss, a home with (even more demanding!) young children or a friend with a serious illness. We want to make things right, instead of be with whatever feels wrong. I have found that trying to wrangle the form of a circumstance, to “make things right”, leaves me exhausted and frustrated.

Working with the?energy?of a difficult situation, therein lies the path to freedom.

It’s only in the last few years that I’ve had the capacity or the tools to operate differently.

I've done a lot of work with ?emotional fitness . Instead of stuffing down emotions, emotional fitness practices help to release the energy of emotions, in a constructive way. It makes space internally, and with that comes more creativity.

Just as important is spiritual fitness. What does this mean? I define this as having the ability and capacity to connect to life in a deeper way, going beyond the circumstance and the five senses (e.g. touch, taste, smell, hear, and see). Instead of trying to figure out the circumstance, I connect at a soul level and use my energetic senses (e.g., light, movement, warmth, voice, and substance). Working energetically, I get to the heart of the matter, with compassion and understanding.

If this all sounds ethereal, it need not be. The tools I’ve used to create ease and grace in my life, no matter the circumstance, are simple and direct. Whether it’s clearing space internally, breaking ties that are harmful, or connecting to light and love, there is nothing complicated here.

My mind tries to make things complicated. My heart knows the way.

PS. If all of this intrigues you, join me for a free event that will speak to your heart, Sanctuary for Your Soul . On February 24, join me for sixty minutes steeped in love, compassion and acceptance.