Making This Connection Will Change the Way You Lead

If I were to name the one book that had the single biggest impact on my life and leadership, it would be?Man’s Search for Meaning?by?Viktor Frankl. I was fortunate enough to have been given this book as a first-time leader.?

I vividly remember how profound it was for me to think about the ability to?choose?a response to what was happening around me, even when what was happening wasn’t within my control. I was in my early twenties, and nothing like this was ever taught to me before.?

Viktor Frankl was a prisoner in the Auschwitz concentration camp during WW II who survived torture and incredible loss. He is credited with saving the lives of many fellow prisoners by helping them understand that despite the fact that the Nazis took away everyone and everything they loved in the world, their captors couldn’t take away how they felt or saw themselves.

Because I witnessed this incredible journey through Frankl’s written words, strength, and methodology, I dove deep into my own passion for examining our “inner lives” and understanding the impact they have on our “outer lives.” Frankl said, “Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space lies our freedom and our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our happiness.”

I never lost connection with Frankl’s words, and my visit to Auschwitz a year before the pandemic only strengthened his story’s impact on me. I couldn’t fathom what he was able to endure and survive. It felt so important to me to bear witness to the lives lost and to honor Frankl and all those who were in the camps. Being there was a life-changing experience and one that I think about every week since I returned.?

With the advances and recent research in neuroscience…Learn more about what we now know with proof about our thoughts and mental models.

Happiness Has a New Curve

We have an outdated understanding of our life stages, according to?The Happiness Curve?author Jonathan Rauch. Most of us think we grow and learn during childhood and adolescence, enjoy our twenties and thirties, experience a midlife crisis in our forties, and then begin a slow decline during our fifties and beyond.

In reality, new research tells us that happiness throughout our lives looks much like a smile—or “U-shape,” as Rauch likes to call it. Life satisfaction tends to fall in our twenties and thirties, hit a trough in our late forties, and start to increase in our fifties. In short, there’s a lot to look forward to in the second chapter of your life.

Wisdom@Work?author Chip Conley latched on to this research soon after he started consulting with Airbnb…Find out Conley’s 7 lessons for finding purpose later in life.

A Look at Purpose for the Eyes, Ears, and Soul

I'm obsessed with purpose. With living life on purpose.?With working and leading on purpose.?With being purposeful and aligned with our values, our time, and our attention.?With what gives our life and work meaning.?And how we can create safe and meaningful connections at work.?Marcus Buckingham’s?Love and Work?is a terrific read and an even better audio book. Those of you who listened to it have told me that you felt as if you were sitting right next to him enjoying a cup of tea (he’s British). If you ever want to chat about it, I'd love to...?Discover why I love Buckingham’s work.

This Month's?Term Definintion:?Going Up My Ladder

"Going up my ladder" refers to a key concept relating to the?Ladder of Inference, a model developed by organizational psychologist Chris Argyris. It involves the process of making judgments and decisions based on a selective interpretation of available information.

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When someone climbs up their ladder, they ascend through several cognitive steps, from collecting raw data to making assumptions, drawing conclusions, forming beliefs, and ultimately taking actions. Each rung on the ladder represents a filter through which we process information, and the higher we climb, the more our thoughts and actions are shaped by our preconceived notions and biases.

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Understanding the notion of going up our ladder helps us recognize the subjective nature of our thinking and encourages us to pause, challenge our assumptions, and explore alternative perspectives before reaching hasty conclusions or taking uninformed actions.

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If you haven’t used this concept at work, chances are you’ve already experienced this idea at home. Paul and I have had our share of “marathon ladder climbs” involving the love-it-or-hate-it spread?Marmite, our different definitions of napping, and what constitutes a “clean” kitchen!

This Month's Check-in Question

What was a most recent moment of awe that you experienced, and how do you recognize when you’re in awe?

Note:?Many of you ask me for helpful check-in questions for your meetings. The check-in process—not to be confused with an icebreaker—is specifically designed to create safety, connection, and belonging. Check-in questions are a great way to give everyone a voice and a seat at the table and are asked at the beginning of the meeting before you get started. This practice sends the message that it is "our conversation," not "mine" or a single person's.Questions?

Drop me a line at?[email protected]