Making a case for seeking Gold in everyone you meet ??

“Results are a consequence of doing things well and having high standards, improving the detail of how we play.” - Gareth Southgate

If you look at your whole life and create a list of all the things that have an impact on your performance, then it would most likely look like the following -

• Health
• Habits
• Fitness
• Systems
• Hobbies
• Coaching
• Nutrition
• Academics
• Profession
• Negotiations
• Relationships
• Communication
• Emotion Management?

Out of all the items listed above, which ones have you been formally trained on?

The most likely answer will be academics—only Academics—since that consumes our entire youth from childhood to the completion of professional qualifications. For example, I was mainly studying until I was 25, scraping through college, thriving in my MBA, and then scraping through my CFA, only to finish it on my third attempt.

Many brilliant minds taught me Finance, Marketing, Mathematics, Economics, International Business, Supply Chain Management, and all the topics that make up the curriculum for B. Com, MBA Finance, and CFA.?

But if I look at whatever little milestones I have achieved, 99% of the credit goes to all the subjects that were never taught to me formally.

• My ability to close deals was learned by repeatedly failing to do so for my dad in his business and at my first few sales jobs with Videocon TV Distributor, Anand Rathi Securities, and SCB. At all these places, I was a disaster, or merely average, but I kept improving.
• My current friendships were formed after repeatedly losing friends due to drifting apart for no apparent reason besides no effort to keep in touch.
• My health had to deteriorate to absolute lows for me to wake up and start reading umpteen books to get my life back in order.
• My systems of productivity and performance were created only after I got burned out chasing audacious goals, which cost me peace of mind and many relationships.
• My communication skills were developed only after thrusting myself into places where I had to step up and enroll more and more people in the project, e.g., volunteering at Landmark Education Corporation or Networking.

These were all learned from mistakes, misjudgments, accidents, or pure luck.

Though it all came to me from unexpected places, the common thread across these accumulations of lessons was one simple fact—every domain has someone operating at higher standards than me, and I need to learn from him, copy him, experiment with his protocols, see what works and what doesn't, and eventually end up with stuff that works for me.

• Vegetarianism didn’t work for me, so I tried a high-fat diet, which worked wonders. Dave Asprey and all his books singlehandedly transformed my health.
• Expecting the moon from others didn't work for me, so I turned stoic with low expectations and focused only on what was in my hands, leaving the rest to providence. This yielded terrific results for me without me chasing them. Seneca and Ryan Holiday were my captains on this journey.
• Being nice all the time didn't work for me, so I started communicating assertively and with humor, finally finding a style that worked for me. Rajiv at LEC, Sachin at Infiniti, Anurag at SCB, and many others imparted invaluable lessons on the way.

Come to think of it, There have always been people around me who had the smarts, skills, nerve, and chips on their shoulders that would put chips in their pockets. All I had to do was recognize their operating standards, guiding values, and life principles—and adopt some, adapt to some, edit some, build upon some—and make a toolkit from these that would catapult me way ahead than I could have imagined.

There is no other alternative unless you think everything should only be learned through accidents and misjudgments through your acts of commission.

Why not learn vicariously?

I have chosen to do that, and it's been a smoother journey than all my previous self-harming stunts.

Today, my thought process is different but evident -

I meet everyone with an open mind, as he may have a skill, a system, a guiding value, or an operating principle that could make a tremendous difference to me and my family. I am just listening with my ears perked, looking for gold to add to my toolkit.

Whenever I find a gem, I send myself a voice note, an email, or an addition to my to-do list—which eventually goes in my journal, where I can record it in a way that sticks with me for a long time.

I also have a spaced repetition system that has turned many of these aspirational values into a part of who I am today. Pounding these into my psyche has been a slow grind, but it’s been possible through patience and time.?

It’s simple.

Cut, copy, and paste aren't only for Excel. They work in real life, too, and I have been blessed by many people who have made them possible for me!

The only requirement is to keep looking for gold in everyone you meet. You might find truckloads of it in the person sitting next to you ;)??

And there is nothing to lose if you don’t. You keep moving on !!!