What others talk about you does matter. Your personality speaks for you before you utter a word. Non-verbal cues are critical in effective communication. People do observe your body language to assess if what you are saying is truth.
Reputation is what others think about you. Personality is what you seem to be. Character is what you really are.
Our impression in the job interview or initial conversation with someone is just a beginning. What happens thereafter and repeatedly matter. Our seniors, colleagues, and clients will know us for how we operate, behave, and respond on a day to day basis. People do observe our behaviour with and opinion about our co-workers, department and organization. In nutshell, our actions speak louder than our words.
- Meetings: It's important to understand our role in the meeting; be well prepared with notes, documentation, presentation; always carry a diary and pen; know the agenda and about people involved.
- Events: Our presence and participation in a variety of events in an opportunity to meet people, have informal dialogue with others, build relationships, and showcase some hidden skills.
- Work Desk: Your work desk or workspace is also part of your presence. How things are organized or otherwise speaks about you. Things that we all surround ourselves is also part of it.
- Social Media: Right from our profile picture and the way to write our name to our posts, likes, comments and even duration of use of social media matters.
Right Personality
There is no single fixed personality that is right for all roles and circumstances. Some positions and situations call for aggressive and bold leadership from the front. Other roles may require a personality that weaves together a more humane approach. Some roles requires personality that builds consensus within a group.
- A strong personality has the backbone of courage and clarity of thinking, and one that exhibits strong soft skills in verbal or written communications.
- The approach and soft skills needed to build a humane approach are to work effectively and almost invisible behind the scenes.
- A personality required to build consensus within a group exhibits the soft skills of being a good listener and build on suggestions of multiple people to arrive at a decision.
- When speed in the essence, the right personality is driven by results, and takes quick and agile decisions based on personal intuition coupled with sampling of views of few key opinion leaders and thought leaders in the group.
Body Language
Body language reveals your inner self and personality. Strong body language means a commanding presence, that reflects confidence, competence and charisma.
- Body language is the strongest signal we omit at all times, without even realizing it. Whether it is through eye contact, hand gestures, facial expressions, or the distance we keep - we are communicating all the time.
- Body language reflects person's emotions. Most common emotions or emotion clusters are Aggressive, Submissive, Attentive, Nervous, Upset, Bored, Relaxed, Power, and Defensive.
- Handshake is the most common body language. Your handshake could be either warm (comfortable, a light grip maximum surface, accompanied by eye contact), unknown (short duration and lack of interest), adversary (tight-gripped, short, jerky, and cold smile), and formal (moderateness of grip & duration and comfortable palm & finger position).
- Eye contact with the audience or person in front, for entire or major portion of the conversation is important. Lack of it can be considered as lack of self-confidence, lack of honesty, or lack of respect.
- We all have our personal space. The distance depends on the comfort, familiarity, and setting. However, there are four types of zones: Intimate zone, Personal Zone, Social Zone, and Public zone. In a professional setting, we generally operate in a Social Zone or Public Zone.
- Gestures: It involves facial expressions and movements. Facial expression should indicate a friendly & approachable disposition; enthusiastic, sincere, expressive; and stir up interest in the other members. Movements include movement of the speaker as well as movement of the body parts of the speaker.
- Posture: Posture refers to how you stand or sit. This is a sure give-away of your attitude and confidence level. Whether you are sitting or standing, a good posture would: be comfortable for you, demonstrate your active interest and confidence, not hinder other communication vehicles such as gestures and movements, and not be disrespectful or embarrassing for others.
Assertiveness:
Assertiveness reflects the ability to express or maintain a point of view in a calm but firm manner, especially when there is a difference of opinion, the situation heats up or when there is a pressure to give in to the opinions of others. To be assertive: believe in your ideology, plan your goals, maintain your position, and maintain a calm approach, be willing to negotiate, and know when to back out.
- Express oneself in a direct and honest manner while simultaneously respecting the rights and dignity of others.
- Can bring out win-win solutions that are more sustainable and long term.
- Work as per your strengths and minimize the negative effect of weaknesses.
- Helps in standing up for what is rightfully yours and denying unreasonable requests.
Framework: The Assertiveness Triangle
Appearance / Dressing
There is no defined dress code at most of the workplaces in the new era. However, there is norms or unwritten rules to be followed. One learns it by observing others, taking inputs from colleagues, and following instructions of seniors. Although it is okay to respect ones freedom of choice, personal identify, and social dynamics, as a professional our appearance should be appropriate for our job. Other factors such as our role, seniority, location, shift timings etc. also needs to be considered.
- Apparels: The style, pattern, texture, color, etc. are generally discussed. In addition, clean and ironed cloths is the most important thing. Dress code could be either business formal, business casual, or causal. When it's not disclosed, formals should be preferred. No doubt your apparels or dressing should be comfortable for you but at the same time you need to adhere to provided guidelines and also not make people around you uncomfortable.
- Grooming: With the rise of influencers, fashion trends, drive to be unique, and flexibility offered by startups, it's difficult to define right grooming. However, for freshers and junior members in the team, it's recommended to stick to grooming like a business professional. There is no point in imitating any of the successful persons in your field who has redefined grooming, as those are expectations and that person has earned that spot already.
- Accessories and Gadgets: I have combined these two together as there is increasing overlap in these two. At workplace or when on business travel, give first preference to accessories and gadgets that are useful to you. If those can enhance your persona, it would be an added advantage.?
