Make the Throw!
Tim Richardson
The Power of the Pause/Exceptional Service keynotes, workshops, and panel discussion facilitator. Speaker, author, husband, father, outdoor enthusiast, and aspiring jazz pianist.
“Throw me a life vest!”
I yelled at Kelly who was quickly moving through the Gulf of Mexico without me. Aided by a strong wind, the the boat we had been sailing on was headed away from me. It was quickly moving toward shore leaving me stranded in the middle of the ocean.
She was distressed and paralyzed with fear. I couldn’t blame her; she had never sailed before, and I hadn’t bothered to give her any sailing instruction in case of an emergency.
I was in trouble.
I was without a life vest a mile or more away from the beach in rough waters just before sunset. Fortunately, I was in my early 20’s, in excellent shape, and had been a swimmer and surfer in high school. I was able to swim toward shore and eventually was rescued after 45 minutes of swimming. Though my story ended well even without a life vest, many other stories of accidents without them do not.
Life vests are important. They help save lives.?
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Sadly, someone in your circle may feel like they are about to drown but they are too afraid or embarrassed to ask for a life vest (if that's you, reach out to someone who can help!). Because their struggles aren’t physical or outward, the situation continues unnoticed by those around them. So they suffer in silence and may become so despondent that they may consider taking their own life.
Our community tragically lost a young teenager recently. Were there signs? Had he asked for help? Could it have been prevented? Did anyone have an opportunity to intervene? There are so many questions that those affected by suicide face.
Similarly, a very good friend of mine lost his brother several years ago. I remember telling his brother once that he was going to either implode or have a conversion experience. I saw the signs and yet I didn’t get involved. No one knew that his internal troubles were so severe. No one offered a life vest.
September is suicide prevention month and a reminder of the serious issue which has increased in frequency over the last several years. I read about it almost weekly on LinkedIn.
Check in on friends, family or co-workers in your life. If someone in your life is struggling, get involved. Be more intentional with those who may seem less like themselves. Think about how you could help if someone you knew was really struggling.
If you notice the warning signs, maybe you can be the one to throw the life vest and save a life.
Attorney | Tuohy Law Offices | Estate Planning | Small Business, LLCs | Illinois Living Trust Lawyer
6 个月I am very sorry for the loss of this young man. Jim, this is an essential message about awareness and being present. Making the throw, however, is bound to many unknowns. Freezing, as your wife did, is common. It's born of fear and uncertainty of doing the right thing and choosing the right words. Perhaps more common is missing the signs. Five days ago, I missed them with a young man I mentored 25 years ago, and in hindsight, they were billboard-size. What was his stressor was magnified by anxiety and deeper issues? It was just a tiny legal case that could go away—the lawyer in me saw that reality. One conversation led to another over two days on a roller coaster. Then he took his life and left behind a wife and 13-year-old twin girls. Undercurrents often occur in calm waters that we can't see. We don't reach for the life jacket because we miss the signs. In my 20/20 hindsight, my conversations with him are different, and like all survivors, I'm haunted by my failure. More awareness can lead to better radar and finding the right words and life jackets at the right time. Thank you for that, and allow me to add the never-too-loud drumroll for more and better mental health awareness, acceptance, and treatment.