Make it Personal, Start with a Story

I’ve been speaking in front of groups for about 15 years, and it never fails: I’m always nervous beforehand. If nervousness were a spectrum of energy, the feeling might range from a fluttery discussion with the butterflies to making up excuses to cancel. (the latter being a sometimes-fantasy that never plays out) There is one thing, however, that calms the butterflies and boosts my confidence every single time.?

I start with a story.

A story is a more engaging and relatable way to start a meeting or presentation than launching into an agenda or a list of statistics. It’s not just more fun for you, it’s more fun for them, creating a strong connection between you and your audience.

I find when I start with a relevant story, it brings equanimity. It’s unexpected to the audience but calming because it’s easy for you to share and for them to listen to and grasp the message when told well.

Katie Couric asked Jane Fonda why climate change is such an important issue to her. (Aspen Ideas Festival podcast)

Jane replied with a story. She said.

“I was born in 1937 in Los Angeles. There were no freeways; there was no smog. There were only two billion people in the world. I could swim safely in the ocean. It wasn’t poisoned. I was one with nature. I would go to sleep to the cry of coyotes. Then I left, and I didn’t come back until I was in my 40s. I had two children. I remember when I first moved back my eyes burned, my children developed asthma, I couldn’t understand why everybody wasn’t talking about this, but I realized it was because they had gotten used to it. When I was little, cancer was very rare. Nobody knew anybody that had cancer. In the 70s and 80s, I began to realize it was a cancer epidemic, and everybody either knew somebody that had cancer or had cancer.”

I am curious to know how this story impacts you. What images conjure in your mind? What kind of reaction?

People expect to be bored at your presentation or meeting. Even if that isn’t true, let’s assume it is. I might have expected someone to respond to Katie Couric’s question with statistics about rising global temperatures, sea levels, or carbon emissions. Instead, Jane Fonda told a story and made it personal.?

It conjured the frog in a slow boil metaphor. The frog doesn’t realize it’s in dangerously hot water because it has gradually changed and dies. What it brought up to you is different and personal. One of the beautiful things about storytelling is how we all relate differently to it but?remember?it.?

Jane shares her lived experience of environmental change within a single lifetime. From the cry of coyotes to burning eyes, from pristine oceans to rising cancer rates. It’s a before-and-after snapshot that makes an idea tangible and immediate.

Make it personal to you; make it personal to them.

By making your message personal, you don’t have to tell?your?story but rather tell a story about why it matters to you.?

It doesn’t have to be an epic story. ?Jane Fonda’s story wasn’t a life-saving story, there wasn’t a massive transformation.

There was a moment when she returned to Los Angeles, and she saw the stark contrast of the environment and the lifestyle the children experienced, which speaks volumes. Her observation about people becoming accustomed to poor air quality reveals a profound truth about human nature and our capacity to normalize deteriorating conditions.

When you lead with a story, you can ride the wave of equanimity that follows and find your flow. The audience is leaned in, and you got past the hard part – the start.?

Next time you need to communicate an important or even a less-than-compelling message, ask yourself: How can I make this personal? What experience can I share that will help others see and feel what I’m trying to convey??

I invite you to give it a try. Where can you try this out in the next couple of weeks? Practice on a colleague or friend beforehand and watch their reaction. One of the beautiful by-products of storytelling is the confidence building that occurs.

Take care out there.

Become a?Powerful Presenter?– work with me one-on-one to level up your presentation skills so you can get better in your meetings, talks, and pitches. The best leaders are extraordinary storytellers who bring their depth of knowledge and ideas to life with clarity and confidence. Storytelling (and being a better presenter) ?is a skill that needs to be unlocked, not learned. You have it in you; you need a guide and sounding board. Let’s talk and make this happen for you in 2025. I will help you funnel all that knowledge in your head into messages that make you the influential communicator you have always wanted to be.?Comment below or schedule a 30-minute chat?to learn more and see if we are a fit. You do not have to prepare for that big opportunity on your own. I will help you nail it!

My new book,?The Power of Story, Connect With Purpose, Unlock Your Influence?is now available!

You can order it here.