Make the Ask, Take the Silence
Peter Roskam
Partner / Federal Policy Practice Leader / Former U.S. Congressman / Host "The Cloakroom with Peter Roskam" podcast
It was intense. I was a new candidate and decided to test the adage:?“The first one to talk— loses.”
I found myself in front of a prospective political donor whom I had not met.?His volatility reminded me of Joe Pesci’s “Tommy” in Goodfellas.?I didn’t have anything to lose, so I decided after I gave my pitch and made my “ask” that I wouldn’t say another word until he gave me an answer.
By my way of thinking, there were three things he could say which would prompt a reply from me. They were “yes,” “no,” or “I’ll give you less.”?If I didn’t hear one of those, I was not going to say anything.
This sounded better in my mind than when I actually sat across from him in his office in the middle of his work day during time he was making in his schedule. After some chit-chat I came around to my pitch and then said:
“I wanted to ask if you’d be willing to contribute a thousand dollars to my campaign.” ?
— FULL STOP —
(A thousand dollars was the maximum allowable contribution almost 25 years ago and it meant something then.)
It got very quiet, very quickly, and he looked jarred, as if I had cheated him.?I had just slammed on the conversational brakes, and he had the expression of someone who had hit his head on the dashboard. Immediately, I second guessed myself. Who did I think I was, coming into this guy’s office, taking up his time by playing some game?
I was tempted to say “I know it’s a lot of money” or some filler which would undercut me but somehow I resisted.
After an uncomfortably long pause, he replied in disbelief:
“A THOUsand dollars ?!”, with emphasis on THOU.
That was a question, not an answer, so I stayed quiet.?He looked put-out as more time elapsed.
“That’s a lot of money!” he declared.
That was a statement, not an answer, so I stayed quiet.?I’m really uncomfortable now. ?
Tick.?
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Tock.
“Let me get this right.” (This is never a good sign.)
?“You want me,” he continued with his thumb to his chest,?“to give you a grand?” he said snapping his index finger at me. His Chicago accent completely flattened out when saying the word “grand” with a hint of menace. ?I’m starting to free fall. ?
Tick.?
Tock.
“Why does a nice young guy with a cute family want to go to Congress? ?That place is a snake pit.”
Question and statement. Not an answer.?
He looked over my shoulder as if off in the distance, and I sat still as if the dentist was going to?drill.?His eyes suddenly focused on mine and, looking like a stone cold killer, he said:
“Okay.”
Whew!
In the years since, I’ve had thousands of fundraising conversations and raised tens of millions of dollars for my campaigns for office.?I developed a better handle on how to ask and became more comfortable with silence in conversation.
The principle applies whether raising money, making a pitch or asking for an order.?As the end of your Q2 approaches, give it a try:
Let me know how it goes in the comments below.
XOgenica Energy Systems
2 年I shall try it today. With a prospective investor with XOgenica. It will be my first.
Business Development Executive
2 年I ALWAYS view the ‘ask’ as you giving someone the opportunity to get involved. i.e. will you contribute $10k to Peter Roskams campaign? Just an example.