Maintaining sanity in uncertainty

7 Personal guidelines to weathering your storms

Life is embodied by a series of seasons. There is a season for happiness and another one for sadness. There are seasons of calmness and disturbing seasons of turmoil, anxiety and uncertainty. It is not the size of the storm that destroys an individual, it is not knowing what to do while engulfed in a storm. There is only one sure thing about storms, they all have an expiry date. Each storm teaches us something about ourselves that we never knew. Storms vary in nature and impact. No one wakes up to look for storms; they just come upon us unexpectedly. We just have to deal with them when they are thrust upon us. Here are some guidelines of maintaining your sanity during the present and future storms.

1.    Watch your words – When you get into a storm and your perception is that the storm will kill you, then you immobilize and exonerate yourself from need to put on a fight. Perception becomes reality. You must maintain positive self-talk where you affirm yourself daily of the possibilities after the storm is over. Affirmations do not focus on the present but the ultimate. They give you a chance to “visualize” the time after the storm is over. You are always in conversation with yourself, please make that inner-talk worthwhile by dwelling on possibility, potential and promises you give yourself for weathering the storm.

2.    Watch who talks to you – When you are in the midst of a storm, your priority is to become the gatekeeper to the windows of your soul. What you choose to see and hear can spell victory or gloom. When you are in a storm, you need to surround yourself with people who support you, partner with you in a fight as well as those who believe in your potential. Limit the frequencies you tune to because everyone wants to have a say about a storm they are only observing while you are the one inside it feeling the heat firsthand. Walk away from certain people for that season. Stick to your core pool of advisors.

3.    Watch your assumptions – it is easy to fall into the pit of assuming that everyone is looking down on you and laughing at you. You can also start assuming that the world owes you a favour to fight the storm that you are in. It is easy to assume that the world has lost their love for your welfare and comfort. People can only go so far to assist you; some storms need your energy and resolve to contend with them. Do not entertain an over-inflated temptation to delegate your storms to other people, even those you have helped before. Everyone has their own storms to attend to. Play your part.

4.    Celebrate your successes however small they are – There is benefit that comes from reflection on past successes. When you can look back to what you have done or accomplished as well as reflecting on the smaller battles you have faced so far in life, your hope wells up. The victories maybe small to other people but are very large to you. Sometimes all you need is that glimmer of hope that then encourages you to throw one more punch. In the big battles I have faced in life, I used the cushion that came from looking at and standing on past “medals”.

5.    Audit your own thought patterns – Anxiety, depression, worry and emotional breakdown are all products of the mind. Take time out to see what thought patterns make you drift into negative territory. Write your thoughts down and connect all the dots. What you think about the most can make or break you. You are your own manager before you even manage other people. You become what you focus on.

6.    Stay true to values and vision – A life without values will be shaken by every whim of pressure and pain. When you have a vision supported by actionable goals, you will not be swayed by the voice of any storm. Your vision should be the script that you look at everyday to remind you that no matter what detours and humps you will meet on the way; you will fight them. As they say, “no pain, no gain”. Sharpen your dream all the time; let it become clearer with the passage of each day. Goals give life to dreams, purpose is the fuel while values remain the glue that strengthens your vision infrastructure.

7.    Laugh and live – it sounds so contradictory that one can be encouraged to laugh while in the midst of a raging storm. Sometimes we beat ourselves up too much because we think we have let down our families and ultimately ourselves. In that state we resign from finding plans out of the quagmire we maybe in. Whether you are in a storm you created or it is a storm that has been thrust upon you, sing and dance for a moment. 

You will weather your storms and help others to do the same. Build your capacity all the time knowing that storms remain a constant in life. We will celebrate with you when you get to the other side.