The magic is trusting you

Gabriela Monroy-Calva

Creative, advisor, workshop leader, lecturer/ Creative, consultant, workshop leader, speaker

April 16, 2024

In life's journey, we constantly find ourselves at the crossroads of choice. From trivial decisions to the most momentous, choosing reflects our self-confidence.

However, for some, this confidence is undermined by the paralyzing fear of believing that they cannot decide well or contribute to "the achievement of their desire", they are certain that everything, everything, is beyond their capacity.

In contrast, the bold stand out for their passion for living, and embrace uncertainty making the first and most important decision: trust themselves.

Self-distrust leads to the paralysis of fear, while the art of trusting oneself frees the mind and holds us accountable for our choices, without giving rise to guilt.

The bold trust themselves because they give everything for the joy of living their own life.

Self-Distrust: The Fear of Choosing Wrongly

For those who distrust themselves, each choice becomes a labyrinth of doubts and fears. They feel that they only have one opportunity to choose the right path and to follow it in a precise and pre-established way, and the weight of this irrational belief becomes overwhelming.

They consider that it will be luck, chance, statistics, the pill, the drink, god, the gods, and masochism that will one day make them worthy of "winning the golden ticket"..., and all of this triggers paralysis of fear that hinders any movement or drives a compulsively performing "trial and error" without method or results.

As I said, fear can manifest in two ways: as paralyzing inaction or as a compulsion to choose, without a true sense of freedom, but in the hope of being "favored" by something outside themselves.

In the first case, the paralysis of fear leaves the person trapped in perpetual indecision. They fear making an irreparable mistake and therefore cling to the security of inaction. However, this inaction perpetuates the cycle of distrust, as each missed opportunity reinforces the belief that "they are not capable of making correct decisions".

On the other hand, some are driven by a frantic compulsion to choose, but this choice does not arise from authentic trust. Instead, it is driven by the desperate desire to escape fear and uncertainty. This compulsion can lead to hasty and ill-informed decisions, often resulting in regret and self-recrimination.

In both cases, self-distrust becomes a prison that limits a person's ability to experience the fullness of life.

In contrast to the paralysis of fear, artists, the bold ones, stand out for their confidence in themselves and their creative process.

They embrace uncertainty as an integral part of the creative journey. They consider uncertainty as part of the process of deciding and creating.

They see every choice as an opportunity to explore new possibilities and discover something new about themselves and the world around them; They assume that they will make mistakes and be able to overcome them and see other options, even when they lose the game.

The bold understand that creating involves taking responsibility for their decisions. They recognize that every brush stroke, every written word, every musical note, and every work done, is an expression of their deepest being. By trusting themselves they commit to the process with courage and authenticity.

Although they may face criticism and failure along the way, they stay true to their vision and take responsibility for the results they get from their decisions. They know that they influence the outcome of their elections and that there are also factors that go beyond them and that they do not control them. (Yes, they can experience the vertigo of realizing how much YOU DO NOT CONTROL).

...Self-confidence is not about choosing the right ticket, but rather about believing in one's ability to navigate the journey, regardless of the final destination.

GMC (c)