Magic route out of my burnout

The past 7+ months I have been struggling with my mental health.

Yeah, I know... I feel the need to share a recent little journey of mine. Apparently I wasn't indestructible.... who knew? Work was my mission and all hours of all days of all years went into this mission. A mission I am sure I share with most of you. Free access to psychedelics for safe informed use. Sharing experiences, moving hearts. Client experiences worth all my time and passion. But my creative brain turned to fear and old triggers, under prolonged stress.

With my #military #neurology and #convictions I worked like a "tank" and I did what I had to do. Wholeheartedly...with a passion. Until all of sudden I couldn't take #pressure, inboxes, feedback and my responses grew ugly to those I love. I felt #powerless and realised I experienced a #burnout. Months with deep dark thoughts followed. I became more isolated. I disconnected.

I started doing the obvious at first. Read up on it. Everything made sense. I started working out again. Eating (chocolate) more consciously. Analysing my trauma. But I must admit, doing psilocybin truffles seemed obvious. But I grew quite afraid of the medicine, the magic. I feared going to the pain. I had never felt this dark. This low. This scared. It felt like the big one.

I always say that people need to hit rock bottom before they can bounce back up. Well, my wake up call came when ("finally") my treasured relationship with a beautiful soulmate ran aground, ....almost. I received all the love, the support but I kept hurting her with my tone, silence, responses... My mind just kept manifesting all its fears. I became hopeless.

I know the answer was near (in my face actually, obviously) and all it takes is for me to face "the music". To prepare for a psilocybin truffle trip. I understand the loving nature of the psilocybin spirit. Its sacred state of being.

So I started with the motions and started with a small dose. It did me good. I lost fear of it. Two deep experiences later I feel I am back. Way back. More balanced, more calm, more centered.

The first was one of my most clear and intense psilocybin experiences. It had all the elements and completely blew my mind. Christal clear images, portals, me as an infant, energy bodies of loved ones. I could navigate it. I saw I was creating my own illusions. #duh

A week later the epic high dose followed like a long slow-motion energetic rebalancing "wave".

In my trips I went back to my traumatic incubator days. Went through divine portals in utter awe. I could thank my sweet dad for everything he ever did. I could see my partner, our relationship. Our energy, our path and journey. Warm, safe, true, real...unquestionable. The flame is back and the energy changed, thank God. Everything felt like a more "peaceful fit". So almost with immediate effect I felt I was back.

I'd lost my shine by not making space for these important experiences in my life. Keeping the flame alive. The glow. The passion with which I promise to lead by example by failing brilliantly, fearlessly and getting back up with full faith in the future. Grateful for the clarity of my magic truffle insights.

Everyone has suffered because of me and this hurts most. But now, doing what I could to fix it, being a dad and partner, a friend, but warmer, more patient, safer, that was worth my world. A better version of me, generally more liberated from limiting beliefs. They resurfaced when stress and fear take over. I'm happy feeling more resilient and having back my optimism. Calm and cautious of my energy. The subconscious narrative seems still blinded by my psychedelic insights.

I am so grateful for my experiences, my path, my work, my connections, my life. To live where access is legal. To work with the magic. To build our trust. To help provide safe and informed access for others.

I cannot un-see and un-feel all those post-session smiling and relaxed faces. Those stories. The tears. Those heart connections. It is simply the most valuable and obvious way to spend my time. Thanks to our tribe. The trust clients give us. The role we are allowed to play. I'm grateful I've found my #Ikigai

This is what we do with all the love and gratitude...

www.psychedelicinsights.com

#mentalhealth #connections #energy #love #trauma #burnout #psilocybin