The Magic Potion

“Oh no, not again,” she said as she looked at her computer hanging for the millionth time that morning. She looked up in despair hoping that someone could feel her agony. No one else looked at her; every one of them busies clacking at their keyboards. Then, to her further dismay, the Task Manager on her computer froze, as if to say “no more, goodbye my friend.” She pushed the power button and the machine whirred and turned off. She pushed the power button to turn it on again, but nothing happened. Push again. nothing. She unplugged the power cord.

“I need a break,” she said and walked out. No one cared. She’d worked on something all week and had nothing to show for it. She took a stroll to the park nearby and furiously paced on its tracks leaving a trail among the fallen leaves. After what seemed like forever to a kid who was watching her from a swing, she sat down on a bench. She plunged her head into her palms and seemed to yell into the void.

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Nonchalantly, the kid approached her and asked, why you walk so fast? You trying to lose weight ah? She looked up and saw this young girl, maybe about five or six or seven, in an oversized t-shirt beaming at her. The gall. She didn’t even know who this kid was. Asking such random questions. Something about her smile was quite soothing and familiar though, so she indulged her.

“Yes, I am. Why?” You not that fat, the kid said. She couldn’t help but smile. “What are you doing alone in this park?” I not alone. You here. “I mean before I came.” I come see trees. “Why?” They like me. “How do you know? They told you?” Letting out a guffaw, Noooo. Trees no talk. Everyone else I go to, say ‘go-go’ or just shoo me away or ignore me. But, trees no talk. Trees look like they happy, swinging in wind. I feel happy. “What’s your name?” DJ. “DJ?” My friends call me that. You my friend now. She beckoned DJ to come and sit next to her.

DJ sat beside her and didn’t say another word. She just sat there looking up at this twenty-something-old young lady having a mid-life crisis. She told the kid about her work, about how everything that could go wrong was going wrong. How she’d lost out on promotion recently because only ‘so many people could be promoted at the same time.’ How she’d received a lower rating because she didn’t stay back late very often, which indicated ‘a lower commitment to the team.’ How everyone at work seemed to be involved in a rat race, pitted against each other and fighting it out unwittingly in trying to impress their bosses.

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DJ listened. After a lifetime of complaining to DJ, she looked up and noticed that the kid was smiling, bemused. She asked, “I’m sorry. I’m not even sure you understand any of this. Do you?” DJ simply nodded in agreement. She said, What is data anasis or presentin is? I don’t know. But, you not happy is I know. “Yes. I’m not happy. This is not the face of happy.” Why you work here then? That question took her back to the interview at 7Talken, 3 years ago.

Question 1: What are your weaknesses? “I am a workaholic. I tend to take on more tasks than I probably should, but I’m committed to these tasks and see them through.” *nice*

Question 2: What are your strengths? “I don’t need or seek external validation. I’m a self-motivated individual, and job satisfaction is all that matters to me.” *super*

Question 3: Where do you see yourself in five years? “I see myself contributing to the success of this company and at the same time expanding my skillset and proving to be a valuable team member.” *great*

Question 4: Why do you want to quit your current job? “I want to move out of my comfort zone, so I’m looking for a challenging role that will: a) develop my skills further, and b) help me contribute more meaningfully to the organization’s growth.” *awesome*

Question 5: “Why do you want to work here?” “I see myself in a company that values my talent and will help me broaden my knowledge. 7Talken is one of the best at recognizing talent, and I believe I can contribute to the organization’s success.” *perfect*

Final Question: There are other candidates applying for this position. Why should we hire you? “I believe in the vision and the mission of this company and personally relate to the goals that you’re trying to achieve. I’m equally passionate about communication technologies and helping people connect.” *tears of joy*

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She was rescued from drowning in her own thoughts any further by a tap on her shoulder. So, why you work here if you not happy? She shrugged and responded, “I need the money.” She was surprised at her own answer. All those things she said in the interview, all those answers that the interviewer lapped up, every word, all boiling down to “I need the money.”

Why so? “I have to pay my rent, course fees, food, travel, and so many other things.” So what? “I won’t be able to do all this without my current job. Would you not work at this job if it gave you money?” Never. I will not take money to be unhappy.

That hit her harder than she thought it would. She never thought of it that way. Being paid to be unhappy. She wanted this job so bad because she thought it would make her happy. Her whole life seemed to revolve around this job. Wake up at 6, get ready, and leave to work. Reach work by 8:30. Work the entire day, then some more. Get back home, cook, eat, and go to bed by 11.

Photo by Victor Rodriguez on Unsplash

She hadn’t realized until now that she spent 17 hours a day fighting a losing battle for 7 hours of sleep. Working to pay the rent for a house that she barely “lived” in. Working to pay for clothes that would make her presentable at work. Working to pay for food that would give her enough energy to go back in to work the next day. Working to pay for expensive transport that would take her to work. She was working to make money in order to be able to have a job. What a ridiculous thing, she thought.

DJ broke the silence with, why you join this work? “I wanted to make a difference. I wanted to become someone. Be my own person. To be the best at my work.” You was want to be better than other peoples here? “No. I didn’t think of comparing myself with others. I only want to be better than what I was yesterday.” You was want boss to say you are best? “No. If she says it, that doesn’t make me best. If she doesn’t say it, doesn’t change who I am.” You was want company to say you are become someone? “No. The company is not a person. Only I know who I want to be and who I am.”

“Only I know who I want to be and who I am. I can’t be defined by a number that someone else gives me.” Lost in her thoughts, she didn’t notice that DJ had walked away on the same trail that she made earlier. She walked back to work wondering how strange that conversation was. Strange, yet comforting.

Photo by Aleksandar Cvetanovic on Unsplash

She looked around the work floor and nope, no change. Everyone still had their heads buried in their screens. “Ostriches,” she guffawed. For once, she had everyone’s attention. She heard a “shhh” ring through the floor and more “shhh”s to shush the other “shhh”s. She plugged back her computer and pushed the power button. Her computer sprung back to life. “Nothing like a good old restart!” She smiled. And then some more as she typed in her login “[email protected]”.

This article was first published on Medium @karthickrichard.