"Be Mad at Who Sold You, Not at Who Bought You!"

When I was working on M&A consulting projects for clients, I frequently spent an inordinate amount of time working with the executives and key managers on the target side.

Too often, management on the acquiring side either doesn’t have enough time to do this, or they don’t value the effort. This is a mistake!

The management of the acquired company, even if they personally will be exiting soon after close, care about their business and their people. They know who the valuable players are, as well as where the issues and challenges are in their business.

Working with and building relationships with the management of the acquired company gave me a unique opportunity to assess their head sets and skill sets – in other words, their potential fit with the company acquiring them. It also gave me the opportunity to both listen to their concerns and give them honest coaching and feedback.

Several times, the acquiring company very much wanted to retain individuals with high potential because they saw them as strong players in the newly combined organization.

But these individuals would often wear their emotions on their sleeves: their body language and sometimes their actual words demonstrated that they were unhappy to be with this new company.

Yes, I understand that change is hard and that after 10 to 20 years with one company, it is unsettling to now find yourself part of a new organization with a different senior management team, a different culture and new relationships to be formed.

Becoming part of this organization, however, could be a wonderful opportunity to be part of a bigger organization that is growing and expanding; and that may offer increased roles, responsibilities and compensation.

"Your old CEO had no problem taking their millions, walking away and leaving you behind. These folks want you, so get the chip off your shoulder and embrace the opportunity."

As the outside consultant, I was able to pull the individual aside and say bluntly, “Don’t be mad” – though I used a different word – “at the company that wants you. Be mad at the company that sold you.? Your old CEO had no problem taking their millions, walking away and leaving you behind. These folks want you, so get the chip off your shoulder and embrace the opportunity.” That person would usually see the light and change their attitude and behaviors, hopefully before it was too late.

Here is a point for those of you on the buy-side to remember: be aware of the common issue raised here but respond in a way that may seem counterintuitive.

Embrace the high-potential managers that may exhibit this attitude. Pull them aside and deliver this same message to them:?“Don’t be ticked off at us for wanting and valuing you,?be ticked off at the folks who sold the company to us.”

Then give them some time to get on board, because at the end of the day, you need key people with the right skill set, but also the right head set!