M?e (mom)- How she taught me the meaning of Intersectionality

Happy International Women's day to everyone!

It’s been a couple of months that I have been trying to finish this article. Every time I scribble down something, I go back to my old days living in a small town with my two siblings and my m?e (mom) .They were good old days; childhood memories remain with us forever and mothers shape our lives every day. I still remember walking back home in the dark after closing our shop. Holding her finger tight, her big brown purse slapping my face and trying to match her pace like it was some kind of a game. Walking fast and counting each steps as we approach home. All I can hear is her whispering, promise me; you will study hard and be a good human!

She follow Norton’s directive; she fed me with the mantra that education and hard word would uplift me. I did not know what she meant by then, the fight to be successful in her business did not come easy to her. Witnessed her daily struggle, cries and discrimination. It was not long then, when my own colour, faith and sexual orientation became a reality. You learn about oppression and differences around you before you even realise it’s occurring every moment around you. Behind all these developments there was one thing common; ‘buzzword’

What’s the Buzzword?

When I first discovered it, it was like a breath of fresh air after a lifetime of breathing smog. Finally, I could stop fumbling for explanations about why I couldn’t separate my colour from my sexuality and faith, why my mother had to work harder than anyone else? In the corporate world, If there's one thing that has always united me and my co-workers, even those with whom I have the least in common, it's that ‘buzzword’.

A buzzword that is complicated for many to understand until they acknowledge and experience it; Intersectionality. It wasn't particularly surprising, when I first entered the world of diversity and inclusion, the word intersectionality was an enormously important word. I was introduced to it through reading?Feminism is for Everybody and Ain’t I a Woman: Black Women and Feminism?by bell hooks in my quest to learn about impact of sexism on black women during slavery.

The concept initially coined by a well known?Professor Kimberlé Crenshaw , a lawyer and preeminent scholar in critical race theory. To understand intersectionality requires critical thinking. Perhaps this is why I flinch when I hear people refer their approach in a corporate world “intersectional” — it’s taking a term designed to complicate our understanding of society and flattening it into a label. Intersectionality is a framework for understanding how a variety of oppressions can intersect, and one that surrounds political activism. But the label is donned more as a mark of belonging than just an action.

"Intersectionality is a theoretical framework to understand how overlapping systems of oppression and discrimination affect and apply to individuals and groups"- Crenshaw

Why Intersectionality doesn't mean ‘ Soooo diverse’

It is an expanded view of Inclusion and It’s not your favourite word ‘sooo diverse’. Intersectionality is the intersection of multiple-stigmatized identities. Take example of my mom, She is a woman but also a woman of colour, she has a dual-stigmatized identities. I am gay, and mixed race. This means that navigating the world, I have separately experienced both racism and homophobia - such is the life of a minority! And, sometimes both at the same time.

Each one of those identities carries its own level of implications, in terms of our ability to be authentic and treated equitably. We are all intersectional. We all have multiple-intersecting identities that bring varying degrees of challenge, depending on the situation.

New words give us so much freedom. I wish I understood the challenges of my mother from an intersectional point of view. A few years back, the cool word was “kyriarchy “. Now it’s intersectionality. How does it liberate women like my mom who still exist and striving to be successful in a world dominated by men, women of colour with a social identity of raising three kids and trying to run a business alone. It isn’t that these words are unhelpful to the cause. It’s what we do to make everyone feel belong in the society and a workplace.

How can you be in Intersectional in celebrating International Women’s Day

There are several ways you can celebrate this day. Firstly, women’s day is everyday. It is your choice whether you want to remain on the surface by sending flowers, and putting photos on a social media or going deep by making commitment to drive a change and having an intersectional approach in everything you do.?

Go beyond ‘women first’ idea

The first step is acknowledging that the term Intersectionality originates in black feminist scholarship, and doing work to better understand its originating context and the struggle it was originally conceived in response to.

Focusing on women first doesn’t solve the problem. The singular focus on one identity - gender - can take away from solving the broader systemic problem. Diversity and Inclusion work is about paying attention to the experiences of marginalized groups, to correct collective biases and obstacles to ensure an equal playing field.

?Imagine you are a woman of colour and work for a company that share a report or running a campaign ‘ We’re focusing on woman’- Despite the good intentions, there’s an deceptive implication behind the message - “Wait your turn. We’re helping the white women first.” This is what non-intersectional approach look like. By bringing a woman of colour to talk in a meeting and not reflecting anywhere in the policy, programs or measures to capture their progress is not a half job but an incomplete job! The key to remember, if we can remove the obstacles for those who are most unfairly held back by our society, then those in the middle automatically benefit, too.

The key to remember, if we can remove the obstacles for those who are most unfairly held back by our society, then those in the middle automatically benefit, too.

Intersectionality leadership

Intersectionality is an art. An art to understand human experiences and challenges. The road to intersectionality isn’t a straight and easy shot. ?It’s a curving, bustling street filled with lots of other drivers, and you have to be ready to share the road. If you’re going to be an intersectional leader in your organization, you have to learn how to put empathy at the forefront of all your leadership practices. Lead with the heart first. Understanding the experiences of woman from marginal background and further their sexuality, religion and faith. They all come as a patch work and create multiple experiences in life.

Intersectional Allyship

While all marginalized groups share the pain of bias and discrimination, they also share opportunities for resilience and strength, and for raising awareness about equity, diversity and inclusion. Women leaders have a special responsibility to be attuned to opportunities for allyship.

Hiring women is not a solution

Just because I said we need to be intersectional and support women. It doesn’t mean you set a target for your recruiter and hire women in every role that you have in the business. Hiring is not a solution to Intersectionality. Understanding your culture, and creating equitable processes, programs and policies is the key. ?

Conclusion

Considering the layers of intersectionality ensures that all voices are heard and there is a conscious awareness of the trade-offs being made — and their implications. Intersectionality is important to me because without it, I wouldn’t have a place in the society. My unique experience in society wouldn't be validated anywhere, and I’d be forced to struggle alone. Adopting the ideals of intersectionality allows people to find themselves in multiple spaces, and use those spaces to rewrite narrative previously written for them. Everyone should get the power to rewrite their narratives. Everyone deserves a chance at individuality.

So continue to advocate for women’s causes, LGBTQ+ issues, racial equity, disability rights, immigration, and more - but do it through the lens of intersectionality. With that, we can actually solve problems, not replace one with another, or just work on issues closest to our own hearts.

Thank you, M?e. Happy International Women's Day.