Luxury is belonging. And belonging is the ultimate luxury.

“I won’t belong to a club that accepts me as a member.” — Oscar Wilde

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There is a subtle advantage in gaining the purchase power, and the knowledge, to access the world’s finest goods and services provided by the Luxury Industry. You become a member of an exclusive group. An elite.

A journey in luxury is a journey across exclusivity and inclusivity, the extreme ends of one of the most rooted human needs: belonging.

The world’s leading luxury companies regularly practise extreme exclusivity so to foster a sense of belonging and in this article, I will present case histories, and the principles used.

But first, a little science.

Humans are social creatures. In isolation, we perish. We form communities to protect our own existence and to manifest our potential. Countries, companies, families, they are all the expression of what Maslow, in his hierarchy of needs, calls love and belonging, which is placed right after (in the visual representation, above) basic physical needs, such as food and water, and safety.

We need relationships to survive and strive.

Walter Longo, one of the world’s leading experts in longevity, travelled the world to investigate the reasons people in some small villages in Sardinia (Italy) and Japan?experienced record longevity. His findings were clear. They ate a very limited amount of food and had deep human connections with family members and neighbours, whom they’d see and talk to everyday.

Dr Dan Siegel, a Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at the University of California, Los Angeles, School of Medicine, who conducted a study on happiness, said: “ Although we in the western world are abundant with food, money and material things, studies show that we are some of the most unhappy people on the planet.

According to Dr Siegel, the “me” discovers meaning and happiness in life by belonging to a “we”. “Although we may think of, and treat, relationships with one-another as the icing on the cake, they are actually the cake”, he says.

There is more to improved health when humans foster meaningful relationships.

“Belonging is a psychological lever that has broad consequences. Our interests, motivation, health and happiness are inextricably tied to the feeling that we belong to a greater community that may share common interests and aspirations. Isolation, loneliness, and low social status can harm a person’s subjective sense of well-being, as well as his or her intellectual achievement, immune function and health. Research shows that even a single instance of exclusion can undermine well-being, IQ test performance and self-control.”

Meaningful relationships activate reward-related brain regions including the ventromedial prefrontal cortex and the posterior cingulate. Activation of these brain regions is thought to cause the release stress-reducing neuropeptides such as opioids and oxytocin, which boost the immune system and protect the body from damage due to inflammation. (as mentioned in Eisenberger NI, & Cole SW (2012). Social neuroscience and health: neurophysiological mechanisms linking social ties with physical health. Nature neuroscience.)

LUXURY IS BELONGING

Both the middle-class person buying her first LV bag, and the anonymous billionaire investor gaining a piece from the art collection that once belonged to the late Paul Allen (co-founder of Microsoft) did not make their purchase in isolation. The bag is to be seen, and so is Georges Seurat’s painting “Les Poseuses, Ensemble (Petite version)”, sold for $149 million, with fees.

A luxury purchase is an affirmation of identity, and the best companies know it well.

They know that designing and producing beautiful items is not enough to build a network of loyal clients, and loyalty is based on the very sense of belonging.

Unsurprisingly, the word “family” is often used (and sometimes abused) to greet customers and employees. Companies call themselves houses to foster a sense of community, and they go beyond words and take exclusive initiatives to foster inclusiveness amongst the selected few (do you see the hyperbole?).

It was 2018 when Cartier made the headlines with what was called one of the “most legendary parties ever”. A crowd of 300 hyper-selected guests was invited to attend Cartier Mirage, where they experienced a futuristic skylight show powered by 250 drones, along with the latest creation of the Maison. Cartier’s iconic panther was projected into the sky, and you can watch a glimpse of the show here (look at how in awe the guests were).

The Mille Miglia is the world’s most popular race for classic and vintage cars since 1927, and it attracts drivers, who are discerning car collectors, from all over the world. For the past 35 years, the main sponsor of the race has always been Chopard, the swiss watch and jewellery house. Ever since, Chopard has launched an incredibly successful watch line named after the race.

Rolex has been sponsoring several yacht races for many years. “Every single owner that enters the regatta, for sure, is dreaming of being handed a Rolex”, said Paul Westlake, a 10-time world champion sailor. “You never see a bigger smile on an owner’s face than when he stands on the podium holding onto that Rolex.” he added.

Luxury brands compete on the level of their gatherings. As recently as October 26th, 2022 The Tiffany Lock Collection event was hosted by Alexandre Arnault and Anthony Ledru. The celebration was held at Sunset Tower Hotel in West Hollywood, California and featured VIP guests and celebrities.

Other industries have taken a luxury approach to foster a sense of belonging amongst their clientele (the dualism inclusivity-exclusivity).

The Centurion card, otherwise known as the black American Express credit card, cannot be requested. It is by invitation only. The fact it offers attractive points rewards, which may not even appeal to the wealthy owners, is of secondary importance. The major benefit is shopping with a card almost no one has, and everyone knows about.

Sitting in the Emirates First-class lounge in Dubai is a lovely experience. The à la carte dining menu is complemented by an interesting selection of fine wines (Emirates is the #1 customer of many prestigious winemakers in Bordeaux and Bourgogne) and yet, what really differentiates it from the equally great experience guests have in the business class lounge, is the sense of exclusivity. Fewer guests, most of which either flying first class, or holding an Emirates platinum card.

The list of companies in the airline, hospitality, banking and luxury industry fighting to gain the loyalty of their customers is long and not everyone gets it right. Many of them offer points and rewards and do not engage customers at a deeper level. An opportunistic approach may grow business for sometime, but doesn’t build real loyalty. Customers will keep their eyes and ears open to a better offer.

It is when brands and their audiences share values, and world’s views that loyalty is cemented.

WHAT TO DO?

There are many things companies and individuals can do to trigger the sense of belonging we’ve been writing about.

1. Listen to the customer and acknowledge their needs, pain-points, and world’s view. Nothings feels better than being listened to. When you put yourself in the listener’s position, the other person will immediately develop a close bond with you.

2. Take a stand. You can’t please everybody. Say who you are and what you believe in, and the people who share the same view will follow. A smart way is to do it after listening to the customer and avoid subjects onwhich you share opposite views.

3. Say who you are not. When Chanel opens a boutique accessible only to selected, high-spending, loyal and socially relevant clients, it makes a double statement. A statement that says who they gather to, and at the same times clarifies who’s being avoided, pretty much everybody else. Equally, there is a subtle pleasure watching economy class passengers wander in the airport, from the windows of the lounge as you’re sipping a glass of Tignanello.

4. Find a common enemy. “Nothing unites people more than war”. Tragic, sometimes, but true. Yet, not every war must be negative. For example, EssilorLuxottica, the world’s largest producer of eyewear, glasses and lenses, has launched OneSight, a philanthropic initiative to fight uncorrected poor vision, which affects 1 in 3 people, in developing countries. In an everyday conversation with a customer, finding a common enemy is easier, and less compromising, than you may think. The bad weather, the heavy traffic, the time wasted scrolling meaningless posts on social media, they are all neutral topics that can help create a sense of familiarity upon which building belonging and loyalty.

TO CONCLUDE

Luxury, and many other aspects of social life, are a fine balance of inclusion and exclusion. A person’s identity, which is their ego, is fragile, and always needs protection and confirmation. You may attract a customer with an excellent product or a good offer, but if you want them to stay with you in the long run, you must develop a sense of belonging. You must give them something to be part of. Call it family, club, group, or society. If it’s not worth belonging to, it’s not worth buying (and paying a premium price) from.

To your success!

Carlo Pignataro

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