?? Love for your business AFTER the infatuation stage

Like all long term relationships, your feelings toward your business will change and evolve over time. I don't know a seasoned retailer who doesn't have a big ol' mixed bag of feelings about their business. Few things in life can bring so much joy and frustration, pride and defeat - sometimes in a single day.

For retailers just starting out, it can be confusing and a little scary when they start feeling REAL feelings (other than excitement and joy) about their budding business. Is it time to throw in the towel? Probably not.

Go with me here on a little analogy trip...?

The romance starts with butterflies and flirting: What if instead of counting these beans all day, I finally open that pie shop? Ooh, that's so exciting! What would I call it? "Pied or Die"? So cute. Everyone loves pie.

Then it progresses to infatuation with the imagined future: It'll be a little shop in my neighborhood, and I'll paint it all red and white, and we'll serve seven types of pie, and everyone who works there will wear cute aprons.

Then you fall in love -- the early, oxytocin love where you might forget to eat: Okay, I'm ready to quit my job and focus on Pied or Die full-time, and it's all going to be so easy, because it's such a great idea, and I love it sooooooo much.

Then, you get married to the idea and enjoy the honeymoon: You tell all your friends, post about it on IG, register your new LLC, start writing a business plan, you start researching city foodservice licensing requirements, and start working on a capital budget.

Then you look over one day and realize that the perfect vision of business you thought you knew has left the kitchen messy AGAIN and does not actually like the color red even though they?wore it ALL THE TIME while you were dating. And the fun nights of dinners out and cuddling become frozen Trader Joes AGAIN and whose turn is it to fold the fitted sheets AGAIN.

So you sit there and think, wow, the butterflies are gone. I'm frustrated and a little annoyed, and generally just not feeling it.?Have I made a terrible decision? Maybe. But probably not. You're just entering the next stage of your relationship -- the one where the real love and devotion?grows.?

Why am I still going on about this analogy? Because we all know that this evolution of feelings in a human relationship is normal, and it's a sign of something more lasting and stronger being built. Your relationship with your business is the same.?

After you make the commitment to launch your business, the honeymoon ends fast. REAL FAST. And that's okay because it's either (a) an indication that you're making real progress towards opening, or (b) an indication that there may be a real issue - like a fundamental mismatch - that you definitely want to identify before you sign a lease.?

Answer (a) means that you've been working hard and long enough to encounter resistance -- the road is long and uphill -- and you're realizing the immensity of the commitment.

Answer (b) means that you should stop what you're doing and figure out what the problem really is. If it's something fundamental -- like you actually hate pie -- don't be afraid to stop. There's no shame in ending the endeavor - just do it before you sign a lease!

So on the day you start having mixed feelings about your new business, congratulate yourself. Have a piece of pie and ask yourself whether you're going to push through or walk away. Either way is progress.