On Love

Whoever said “love is blind,” said it wrong! Actually, love should be blind!

All forms of life transcend from the ‘Collective conscious’ – simplistically put our souls are like tiny drops of water coming out of a single ocean. Each drop independently is incomplete…collectively they make the complete ocean. The ultimate purpose of all drops is to go back and unite with the ocean and become one with it. Each drop follows a different path, a different process to reach the ocean. And the journey of each drop is unique and full of unique experiences. Each drop represents a lifetime.

Our souls are like drops evaporated out of the collective conscious, going thru the process of distillation and precipitation to be able to converge back into their origin. Life is like a distillation chamber!

Like the water drops, souls also get contaminated depending upon the ‘karmas’ that we accumulate. Learning’s and realizations from our ‘karma’ or life experiences purifies our souls.

What is love and why it should be blind?

Love is the emotion of oneness. Love is when one drops everything and unites with another ‘drop’! ‘Falling’ in love is actually ‘rising’ towards higher consciousness. Ironically we often restrict our own upliftment as we are spiritually unaware and intellectually corrupted.

Intellect tells us to find love with open eyes. Be rational. Along with it comes the collective intellect of the society and its corrupted norms. The most natural distillation process gets disturbed and we lose the opportunity to unite with ourselves.

What happens when one falls in love?

While falling in love is mostly used in the parlance of man-woman relations, it is necessarily not the case. One can fall in love with a pet, a place, a child even a thing. We are constantly falling in and out of love. Man and woman love undoubtedly is the highest form of love as it is the only form of love that is fully complete.

Like magnets facing the correct poles, the lovers get attracted to each other. The attraction of the souls is oblivious to the societal norms, the practicality of relationships, socio-emotional consideration etc. Like magnets, they just get attracted. Deep inside one feels blissful and calm. Spiritual distillation begins. This is the most amazing feeling in the world. If continued undisturbed this feeling can lead us to our purest divine forms.

Intellectual understanding of emotions is only possible thru feelings. And we feel through our senses. This is where the sensory experience of love comes into the picture. The poetic relevance of the fragrance of the beloved, a momentary glimpse worth the 4-hour wait, the voice that sounds better than a Beethoven symphony, the tender touch – all are the sensual manifestation of the ultimate feeling of bliss.

The highest form of sensory experience is, of course, the experience of ‘making love’ the experience which satiates all five and the sixth sense. Sex without love is not as gratifying since the sixth sense is not involved.

So what goes wrong?

Like all other natural processes, human evolution has disrupted the process of love also. What needs to be experienced unconditionally is laden with the most complex intellectual, egotistical and societal conditions. Few poisons that deprive us of experience blissful love are:

Expectations – the drop of water has no expectations from the world around or the fellow drops. It unconditionally wants to unite. Divine souls in human form have expectations. If you love me to behave like this, do this, don’t do that. Expectations lead to conditionality. Pure love cannot be experienced under the confines of conditionality.

Societal norms – the biggest impediment of spiritual growth is the creation of societal norms. Love means marriage, family, socializing with my friends, alignment of views etc.

Ego – ‘I’ is the largest roadblock in the path of love. Union in love needs melting of the being. The being however refuses to even bend. Ego creates its own, most absurd, litmus tests to identify love. Repeatedly we kill the intuition on account of lack of explanation.

Need to own – whatever gives us pleasure we want to own it. From natural scenery, plants, animals, fragrances, music to fellow human beings. If I love you I want to own you. Ownership means control. And controlling other souls is like taming the flow of the river – too much effort for no counterproductive results.

Logical reasoning – Why do you love me? What’s the hidden agenda? Yes, in the name of love often people end up taking advantages. Remember real reason of true will be unreasonable. We kill love with analysis paralysis.

Pleasing others – often love gets sacrificed because of our own need to please our other loved ones. We believe that love is only worthy is it is approved by all other incidental people in our life. Others are incidental in our journeys to meet our true soul mates. That’s the ultimate reality of life!

Practical considerations – we asses practicality of love before experiencing it, forgetting that often the initiation of love may have happened in most impractical of the situations.

Finally, how to be in love?

Being in love is not just a desirable thing in life. It is imperative for a contended life. Lifetime contentment requires us to be:

Be blind: Whatever we see is an illusion – Mithya! Illusions are created by our conditioning and intellect. Be blind to the future. Just experience the bliss in the present. No eyes can see the future…when we start planning a future love disappears. Just experience love in the present, on and on. LOVE has to be blind. No wonder best kisses are experienced with eyes closed!

Love unconditionally: Conditionality is not a good condition for love. Love is an end in itself. Don’t expect any benefit out of being in love. The journey itself is the destination.

Kill the intellect: If you think while loving, you will never be able to love. So kill the intellect. What, why, how, where…true love never has answers to these questions. If it is, it will take all care. You don’t have to think and plan.

Be true to your own self: Experience love where you feel it and feel it truly. Looking at love through the approval of others will only harm you. True love is like sexual pleasure – only you would know why something is pleasurable for you.

Stop using love: Once we experience love, we want to use it for everything - Social status, money, family, security, sex etc. It is nothing but emotional blackmail, leading to conditions and hence disruption of the distillation process of love. Ironically, we all use love subconsciously.

Live Love & Let Go!!!