Love: The Other Four-Letter Word

Why It Matters More Than You Think

Love.

It’s not a word many people are comfortable using in the context of leadership. In fact, a lot of leaders shy away from it altogether. They think it’s too soft, too emotional, or that leadership requires a level of emotional disconnection. But I believe love is not only essential in leadership, but it’s also one of the most powerful forces a leader can deploy to inspire loyalty, trust, and performance in a team.

Let me tell you why.

In the month or so since I left my position as CEO of Vecta, I have received messages from two of my previous mentors. They reached out not to discuss business, but to check in on me personally. They wanted to make sure I was okay. They asked if I needed anything. These were people I hadn’t worked with in many years, but their concern for my well-being didn’t stop when I left their direct line of influence. That, to me, is love.

It’s also why I would still follow them anywhere.

Redefining Love in Leadership

When I say “love,” I’m not talking about sentimentality or something without boundaries. I’m talking about a kind of love that is rooted in care, respect, and commitment to the people you lead. It’s about more than just performance metrics or hitting KPIs—though those things matter. It’s about seeing the whole person behind the role they play in your organization and being genuinely invested in their well-being and success.

Here’s the truth: people want to be seen. They want to know their leader cares about them beyond what they can contribute in the next quarter. When a leader shows genuine love for their people—by checking in, supporting them, and standing by them—it builds a level of trust and loyalty that no amount of technical skill or strategy can replace.

Love in leadership shows up in small, powerful ways:

• Reaching out to a team member after they’ve had a tough week, not to talk about work but to check on them as a person.
• Offering support during personal crises or challenges without expecting anything in return.
• Creating an environment where people feel safe, respected, and valued for who they are, not just what they do.

Love aligns perfectly with the principles of my LIFT Leadership framework—it encourages leaders to Listen and Look deeply at their people, to Identify what truly matters, to Focus on building trusting relationships, and to Take Action with empathy and accountability.

Boundaries in Love and Leadership

Now, let me be clear—love in leadership doesn’t mean there aren’t boundaries. Leadership requires us to make tough calls, hold people accountable, and navigate challenges that demand objectivity. Love without boundaries can lead to favoritism, blurred lines, or even a reluctance to have difficult conversations when needed. That’s not love—that’s avoidance.

Real love in leadership involves accountability. It’s caring enough about your team to provide feedback, help them grow, and challenge them to be better—even when it’s uncomfortable. Love doesn’t shield us from the hard truths. It encourages us to speak those truths with empathy and the genuine belief that we’re helping the other person grow.

Love in leadership means:

• Setting clear expectations: Holding your team to high standards because you believe in their potential.
• Giving constructive feedback: Sharing honest insights when things aren’t working, but doing so with kindness and a focus on improvement.
• Maintaining professional boundaries: Love can’t interfere with objectivity, fairness, or the ability to lead the entire team equally. Boundaries allow love to thrive in a way that benefits the organization and the individuals within it.

The Potential of Love in Leadership

Love has the potential to transform organizations. When people feel loved—when they know their leader truly cares—they give their best. They feel safe to take risks, to innovate, and to speak up when things aren’t right. They work harder because they know they’re valued, not just for their work output, but for who they are as people.

When I reflect on the mentors who reached out to me after I left Vecta, I see that their leadership was successful not just because of their expertise, but because of how they made me—and countless others—feel. They weren’t just managers; they were leaders who loved their people. And because of that, they will always have my loyalty.

Love in leadership creates a culture of trust and respect. It builds environments where people are committed to the vision because they know their leader is committed to them. And in times of challenge or uncertainty, that’s the kind of leadership people follow. Not because they have to, but because they want to.

Final Thought: Leading with Love

Love in leadership isn’t weak. It’s not about avoiding hard conversations or letting emotions run the show. It’s about leading with humanity, caring for people, and understanding that leadership is about much more than driving performance—it’s about fostering connection, trust, and growth.

So, how do you lead with love in a way that drives results? By showing up with empathy, setting strong boundaries, and investing in the people around you.

When you lead with love, people won’t just follow your direction—they’ll follow your example.