Love knows no boundaries or barriers

Paulo Coelho writes "a perfect heart is not one that lacks a mess of scars and tears". In fact, a perfect heart has holes with love we’ve given away, it has mismatched pieces of other people who gave us a broken piece of their heart, only to fill those very holes left by others. Love gives us a perfect heart, a heart that’s selfless, generous, compassionate, perfect in its imperfection. Love has no bounds because love is not related or restricted to any particular thing or person.?

I guess it’s the kind of term people still struggle to define and the term that mankind hasn’t been able to settle a single definition on. Everyone’s definition of love varies. In fact, our life is a series of love taken for granted. The way our mothers introduce us to the world and run when their ears ring with our infant cries. How fathers introduce the world to us and give us those long life important lectures at the dinner table. Love is when the sibling you usually fight with, comes to console you in your room and says, “Yes, don’t worry. I got in trouble for that once too.” It’s when your best friend picks up your 4 A.M. call to listen to you cry, or just talk, or say nothing at all.

And for others love is God and the world they see around them. It’s the peace they find when they cry in prayer and have a hope of light that hugs all around them. Some fall in love with the sunsets and sunrises, they are in love with the sound of rain and the cold kiss of snow. Some people fall in love with the perfume of grass after a storm or scents from around the globe. People fall in love with the tastes of certain foods as they hum in delight and try to savor every bite.

Other people fall in love with the transcending levels of music, how a note of a piano could vibrate in your heart and set off ripples to far away memories. We fall in love with the smell of printed book pages, with the new world we get to step into when we play a video game. We fall in love with other people. Beautiful souls that fill our life with episodes of love. With some we share only a few months, with others we share our whole lives. Love teaches us sacrifice, how to give something so precious as our time or efforts, our care and compassion to someone else. Love fills the world you breathe in. It is everywhere and anywhere. The only thing that distinguishes it, is we all fall in love with different things and have our own unique way of loving, which is probably why…

Love is the kind of term people still struggle to define. And yes, it has no bounds for life is an abundance of love. Sometimes you need to give up on people. Not because you don't care but the reason being they don't. So if they don't love you as much you do or they don't care, then it is pure one sided love. You can't force someone to love you. Problem is that you are the one only suffering. The opposite person won't as they don't have that same feelings for you as you do for that person. So better leave it. Forget it. But you can't unlove someone.

Some may be for sex and lust: which serves as an act of procreation, is a primitive instinct, a source of pleasure, a stress reliever and an interactive ritual or a connection with a fellow human being. Reciprocal liking. If someone likes you, the probability of you liking that person back increases, especially if there is a big familiarity between two people and synchronicity. Hence why often someone in a male-female friendship ends up falling for another. Love is a drug. Love affects the same brain reward circuits, which are responsible for addiction to heroin and cocaine. If you tasted it once, you’ll want more and actively search for it. In addition, humans are social animals — we crave contact, comfort and mutual understanding.

That feeling of euphoria, and the release of dopamine, adrenaline and norepinephrine. It’s an addictive rush and oxytocin further bonds us to another person. Even if love was marketed as straight up poison, we would still gladly consume it because poison is that irresistible and we, as humanity, are that incredibly illogical. Most people end up not finding real love. They fall prey to the love or should I call it ‘craze’ for the path they walk upon that leads to their perfect match.

People end up loving the journey of hopping from one lover to another. And trust me, it might never feel like it, but that’s what the truth is. It becomes a game, and you get addicted to it. Your previous partner, ‘X’, always seems better than the present ‘Y’, and then to find better, you latch on to ‘Z’, but alas! Now you miss ‘Y’ and feel like you made a mistake. The worst part of it all, you thought you were in love with them. But were you really in love? Was it really love? Is love that disposable.

The bitter truth is, you end up making life a quest for love, when love should never be searched for. You won’t have to go search for it with a torch-light in the dark. It’ll come to you, at the right time. And I'm not an anti-lover kind of person. I'm just the one who believes in the bigger picture and thinks that there are bigger things than that cliched love. The kind of love I believe in isn't imaginary, and it's right in front of your eyes. I believe in the love of parents for their beloved children; the love between siblings; the pure love for rain drops, that you always end up drenched in the rainfall and you don’t regret it, even if you catch cold; the love that you love to shower on your pet, you’re always dying to see him and constantly worried about him while you’re out. I believe in this kind of love.

I believe in living and loving the moment. But the unfortunate part is that in the quest of pursuing the eternal love, we sideline the real one. We always overlook it over the virtual one. ?recently discovered that all relationships are continued for the sake of your own self interest. Even the very basic of the mother and child is for selfish reason, the mother wants to enjoy the period of motherhood (or because of societal compulsion) so she gives birth to a child, or to derive meaning for an equation between husband and wife they give birth to a child.

So where is the basic principle of unselfish means of having a relationship. We do many things not to satisfy others, but to make ourselves happy and human being according to me is a “selfish being” who does all actions just for the need to satisfy his emotions and wants, the word “sacrifice” is a very superficial word and does not exist at all. Even if we give up on anything it is because of satisfying our own level of emotions because it feels good to do so. So where is the question of doing anything for others. Cheers!