Looking Out for Others

A couple of weeks ago, someone extended an invitation to me to attend a casual weekend gathering in someone's apartment. Thirty or so people were expected in this informal setting, and I knew a fair number whom would be attending. The hosts of the event knew I'd be coming. I was excited to join.

When I showed up at the event, there were roughly 10 people there, none of whom I recognized except for the hostess. Not wanting to tag along with her as she prepped food, I headed into the living room. And suddenly a moment of terror came over me. I felt myself going into my shell, accelerating by the second. My impulse was to run out of the room, head out the front door, and not to return.

Just then, someone called out that they recognized me from the summer camp we both attended decades earlier. Another partygoer asked about my connection to the hosting family. And then a third person, seated across the room, shouted to me, "Why don't you come sit next to me?" I grabbed a plate of food from the buffet and sat down next to him. He introduced me to a few people there. I wound up liking all of them.

By the second hour I was at the party, I spotted a dozen or so people I recognized and knew. Still, I chose to stay in the company of the guests I'd just met, the ones who bailed me out in my time of need. By the end of the party, I was one of the last to leave. I thanked the hosts for a great afternoon. I've talked about that group of people repeatedly since this episode, citing them as beacons of kindness and goodness.

Yesterday afternoon, at a similar gathering, I saw someone who came as a +1 of a guest looking to be a bit lost. Mid-conversation with others, I called across the room to this stranger (at least to me) and said, "Why don't you come sit next to me?" I empathized with the feeling, with that situation. He and I wound up chatting for much of the party, and I learned a good deal about his life owning a bar and his background in theater.

What's this have to do with business? Well, two weeks ago I started a new job, and slowly but surely I've reached out to a number of my new colleagues to learn their names and a bit more about them. I'm more than halfway through the company by now, and I hope to have everyone's names down pat by the end of the month.

Mondays usually mean new hires are starting. Seek them out within their first days. It could do more than help ease their transitions. At lunch, call over to them and say, "Why don't you come sit with us?" That would probably mean the world to them.