Look inwards to find a solution

I think it's because we know about our imperfections (even though we do not consciously acknowledge that always) and become afraid to confront them within us. Lack of self acknowledgement can even block self satisfaction which generally brings contentment within oneself. Hence, I think it is important to sometimes gather enough courage to look inwards to learn about ourselves and forgive ourselves first in order to be a better human being. It's up to what mindset they have. They don't have great reason to come out from there comfort zone. They already have that they need to live. For example : a labourer has to do work daily they don't have option to become lazy. If they don't work they don't have money to feed their families. Laziness only come from comfort zone. The person has to come out of it and find reason to improve themselves.

People don’t like to acknowledge that they have control over themselves because they are afraid of change, not the other way around. These two things still are deeply connected, however. The resistance of change is mostly explained by the uncomfortableness a lot of people have with risking what they do have for something greater, in concern that they lose their current situation to something worse. Plus most people are lazy. It’s hard to change. It requires effort, which a lot of people aren’t a big fan of.

But how do they resist the change? How do they take that uncomfortable pressure of them? Lack of control seems like a perfect excuse. “This is just me,” they say. “I’m just being myself.” “Yeah, I just have problems with change.” “It’s not my fault.” “You don’t know what I’ve been through.” Many in this world will pinpoint anything, anything to take the responsibility out of their hands so they are not forced to change. They already are resistant to change, and this causes them to victimize themselves, taking the control right out of their hands.

Even I also fell in that category. And I was happy with it knowing it is only the correct way of living. I was happy and content because I didn't know what I can do by improving myself. And I am certain most people do feel the same. But eventually I was exposed to some spiritual stuffs and self improvement books. And from there, my journey of self improvement began. Actually we are what we feed our mind to. So if someone's diet is not healthy, he will never attempt to do anything. And it's not a problem with specific person. Everyone does the same, until they realise it needs to be changed. That need is only triggered through nourishment of the soul and mind with positive and powerful information.

I personally felt the difference, when I started reading books my whole paradigm started shifting. I was exposed to the world which I thought was never possible. Slowly and gradually, I realized I need to change. This is not what I am or what I should be. I need to work on myself. And from there my journey begins. Humans are a social species. We rely on forming societies for our lives. Few people can live without any other people; nobody can live if every other person wants him dead.

We have evolved as a social species for millennia. Each of us comes pre-loaded with the need to be seen in a good light by our in-group, however that may be defined. Public speaking shines a spotlight, sometimes literally, on us. It exposes us to the possibility of scorn, ridicules, rebuke, or rejection by our peers. These are existential threats, just as surely as are spiders and sharks. We evolved to exist in small nomadic tribes of hunter-gatherers. Expulsion from such a group is a death sentence. The fact that we no longer live that way is as irrelevant to our fears as the fact that few spiders are actually dangerous.

We go to thought in mind to find what we know… from the brain giving us a matched memory to what we see or hear. From this impulse at first/blush recognition we run rational reasoning justifying the impulse, “of course it is.” This reasoning sets upon us… expectations ahead as the brain tuns a here and now program - continuing. Normal for people? We do not want to know more fearing fear itself, that we our expectations will weaken organized as they are - knowing more.

There are plenty of people out there who give of themselves and try hard! Take first responders, for instance. How about people who volunteer on suicide hotlines? I know people who are so kind, they help get donations to people who really need help in weather disasters and so forth. Dump those people who don’t think they have to be nice to you. They suck and are not worth your time. And they rarely change. You’re better off alone than being treated like an option.

I knew a woman who only called me when she felt like it even when I left her messages weeks earlier. We went to high school together. So weeks went by, and when she called, I got to hear about her messed up life. I am not a psychiatrist, friendship is supposed to be a fucking 2 way street. No wonder she’s obese and her ex-husband left her. She never demonstrated that she was interested in anything I had to say. Forget that crap. Cheers!