A look back at the 2 years that went by...

A Coincidental Return: Reflections on August 1st

On August 1, 2022, I arrived in Bhubaneswar, having taken the Konark Express from Mumbai. Exactly two years later, on August 1, 2024, I was standing at the Bhubaneswar Railway Station waiting for the same Konark Express again—this time heading somewhere else. The coincidence struck me, and as I watched the train pull into the platform, memories of the past two years rushed back, compelling me to reflect on this period.

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The Decision to Join: Placing a Bet on Gram Vikas

I still remember the odd circumstances under which I decided to join Gram Vikas. I was at the cusp of placements, looking for an opportunity that would take me out of my comfort zone. Working at the grassroots level in a place I’d never been before seemed like the right way to challenge myself. When I got the call confirming my selection, there was a mix of excitement and nervousness—knowing very little about Odisha, but eager to dive in headfirst. The biggest relief was that since the organization usually recruits in the first weeks of the placement process, I had the whole of my last semester to relax, knowing I already had a job in hand.

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Personal Roots of Migration: Drawing Strength from Family

The idea of migration wasn't foreign to me. My parents—Appa and Amma—moved to Mumbai from Kerala in the early 90s in search of a better future. Their stories of adapting to a new city were always shared with a mixture of pride and struggle. It was these narratives that perhaps planted the seed of resilience in me. I believed that if my parents could adapt and thrive in a new place, I could too—no matter what challenges lay ahead in Odisha.

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First Impressions: A "Honeymoon" of Discovery

My first year at Gram Vikas felt like what we often call a "honeymoon period." Our induction was designed with village stays, and I was sent on assignments that required walking kilometers through forests and hills to reach remote villages. These experiences were novel, sometimes daunting, but immensely enriching. As someone who finds it challenging to step out of my comfort zone quickly, this experience was both daunting and enlightening. We walked kilometers to reach remote villages, some even had to cross rivers to reach, slept in community centers offered by villagers, lived in water tanks, ate at random uninvited weddings, danced with them in their celebrations, and even taught them some of the songs I knew. I witnessed lifestyles vastly different from what I was accustomed to. The simplicity of the community members and their excitement to see someone alien to them made my settling period easier, Crossing rivers, living in a water tank, and interacting with communities under the open sky—each moment brought new perspectives and added layers to my understanding of rural life.

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Overcoming Fears: Wildlife and Isolation

I used to never step out without a torch, fearing snakes. The initial shock of finding reptiles and insects inside my room was something I had never anticipated. But befriending a frog in my toilet surprisingly helped ease my phobia. Over time, I became accustomed to the sounds of these creatures, especially during power cuts, with crickets providing company through long, dark nights. Still, there were moments when I missed the comfort of city life.

Knowing that these conditions were common across most of our locations, and that my colleagues shared similar experiences, helped me push through the challenges. Their support turned daunting tasks into shared adventures, reassuring me that while I felt clueless, I was still moving in the right direction.

The first year was filled with travels across the stunning mountains and streams of Gajapati, offering moments of rejuvenation. Riding through lush landscapes and enjoying local cuisines was a major reason I came to Odisha. Yet, loneliness still crept in. Despite thinking I could adapt to a slower life, I struggled with solitude and even questioned my choices. There were moments when I considered leaving.

But field visits helped me overcome these feelings, and I began finding joy in small moments—a scenic sunset, sleeping under the stars, or discovering that my broken tap had been fixed while I was away. That simple act brought me immense joy and reminded me that happiness can be found in the little things if you’re truly open to it.

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Language and Laughter: Finding Belonging Through Words

One of the highlights of my early months was learning the local language. Though my mastery was limited, I made it a point to engage with the community in Oriya. The joy on their faces when I spoke a few words in Saura, the language of the local Adivasi community, was priceless. It broke down barriers, and I started feeling more connected, not just professionally but personally, with the people.

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Year Two: The Reality Check After the Honeymoon Phase

If the first year was about excitement and discovery, the second year brought a reality check. We had settled into our roles, but it became evident that what we were delivering didn’t fully align with what the community needed. A "course correction" became essential. We revisited the community, conducting field surveys to better understand their changing priorities and struggles. The insights were humbling—there were gaps between our interventions and their expectations. This was a critical moment for us, reinforcing the importance of participatory development and the need to listen, adjust, and collaborate with the community rather than assuming a top-down approach.

Rekindling Creativity: Rediscovering Art and Theatre

In the midst of these professional challenges, a personal breakthrough happened. A summer workshop on Theatre of the Oppressed in Himachal rekindled my long-lost connection with art and theatre. Over time, I had unknowingly distanced myself from these passions, but rediscovering them became a pivotal moment. Art and theatre weren't just hobbies—they were tools for empowerment and connection. This realization reawakened a sense of purpose and self-worth that had faded amidst the day-to-day grind of fieldwork. I started to use theatre as a medium to connect with the community, bringing creativity back into my work and personal life.

Moments of Pride: Taking the Lead in the Field

Some of my proudest moments have come from leading field activities and training programs for Pravasi Mitra, our field implementation partners. I still recall the success of a training session where I introduced the Pravasi Mitra to Image Theatre—a form of Theatre of the Oppressed. Not only did the participants embrace the tool, but they also independently organized a public performance in their own village. Watching them take ownership of the initiative was one of the most fulfilling experiences of my time here.

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Looking Ahead: Gratitude, Growth, and New Challenges

Looking at the two years that went by, I can’t help but feel immense gratitude. It was filled with moments of extreme highs as well as extreme lows (moments where I was on the verge of packing my bags and going home). The learnings helped me navigate through this rough yet amazing journey. The experiences here have shaped me in ways I hadn’t anticipated. The relationships I’ve built, the communities I’ve worked with, and the personal growth I’ve undergone—these are the treasures I’ll carry forward. The future holds new challenges, but with the lessons learned in the past two years, I feel that I am at a much better place than where I was a year ago. From not knowing what exactly I want from life, I am getting to clearly realise what I do not want from life.

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