The Long Game, best taken with the long patience
Alisa Grafton
Lawyer who Speaks II Founder of Great Networking?? || Speaker on Networking and Connecting with Gen Z ??|| Author of "Great Networking" ?? || Consultant Scrivener Notary??at Notable Notaries || UCL Course Convenor
When I was a junior lawyer, a boss sat me down once and asked me, with a tinge of prejudice in his voice: "When will we be seeing the results of all of that networking, Alisa?"
"I don't know", was my honest answer, "but I hope that we will". I was hoping indeed, from the very bottom of my heart. But there was no guarantee.
And herein lies the biggest fallacy about networking: we all know that it is essential to learn building relationships in order to get ahead with anything - because people do business with people - but most of us don't know how the matrix works exactly.
And even for those of us that do, we know that it is not the exact sciences. When we get all our ducks in a row, when we connect with people well, when we follow up properly, when we have mutually identified and subsequently verbalised common interests, when we skillfully manage the important relationships while keeping an eye on Cat B and Cat C connections, when we.. etc etc etc - we STILL don't know when and how the magic will happen.
I sometimes think of networking as the long game where the one who has the nerves of steel wins big. Why? Because you have to trust the process, you have to invest in the relationship, you have to be clear on your purpose, you have to look ahead while foregoing the satisfaction of getting the deal done "snap-your-fingers-now".
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"Nope", says Josh the Gen Zer, "I don't have the patience for that. The social media has spoiled us! We have a short attention span, and if the connection loses aura, it's not giving good vibes".
Okay Boomer - I felt he was about to add...
Actually, it's a lot more exciting in my book. Networking is a little like being a cat - your strength is in your patience. Your approach is slow but your focus is sharp. There is no panic - your new connection will not run away. Take your time building the rapport, and the rest will fall into place. Most likely. But no guarantees.
Still, considering the opportunities that networking offers, the long game is well worth it.