Lonely in a Crowd

Have you ever been lonely in a crowd of people? That’s the question a client posed to me a few weeks ago. “Yes,” I told her, “I have.” “In fact,” I explained, “you don’t have to be alone to be lonely. My most lonely moments have been when I was surrounded by people but didn’t feel seen, heard, or valued for what I bringing to the group.”

And come to find out, “Whitney” and I aren’t alone in having been lonely at work. The Belonging Barometer 2.0 study by EY uncovered a sense of loneliness at work from a whopping 82% of global respondents. And we aren’t talking about the loneliness that just comes from remote work. We are talking about the lack of genuine human connection that has turned many workplaces- remote and in-person- into a series of repetitive transactions over eight hours a day.

As work becomes a lonelier place to be, team productivity and morale suffer, disengagement and turnover increase, and personal health takes a hit too. Jennifer Moss, author of The Burnout Epidemic has shared that “Loneliness is as impactful on our health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day.”

It’s not a lost cause. Employees like my client Whitney want to connect, they want to be seen and feel valued for the unique perspective they bring. Employees will respond to our gestures, but as leaders, supervisors, and co-workers we have to be deliberate in the actions we take.

Here’s some ideas you can try out today.

? Be deliberate in scheduling time to build relationships. Ask one person out to lunch each week. Bring a coffee to someone you know has been working extra hard. Ask questions, not just about what people do at work, but who they are. And of course, be willing to share a bit of your “outside of work” personality and what you care about with them.

? Create, support, and promote Employee Resource Groups. Has your company established ERG’s? If so, make sure all of your employees know about them and encourage them to take time during work hours to participate.

Maybe your company hasn’t created a program. Talk to your HR Leadership and share the data that shows by providing opportunities for like-minded people to come together during working hours, work productivity and engagement spill over and affect all of an employee’s working hours.

? Provide a psychologically safe place for people to share their perspectives, cultivate their inner strength, and be authentic when voicing opinions. Work to ensure that the environment in which people collaborate is respectful and promotes a growth mindset.

? Encourage teams to raise their collective resilience through collaborative work and development opportunities. When people are allowed to have fun together at work, bonds develop. People feel seen, heard, valued, and appreciated, which makes getting focused and producing high quality work a much easier thing to do.

If you are looking for an opportunity to bring short bursts of programming to your team or ERG, check out my new Micro-Learning Series. Each series consists of four 60-minute virtual workshops on topics from Mastering Your Muddled Mindset to Leveraging Your Virtues for Increased Productivity. I would love to help your teams explore their possibilities today.