Loneliness teaches us what is life

Learn Minimalism : Own Less, Live More. Basically I talk to very selected people in my life. My friends and family often complain about it to me. I chose not to tell them the reason. Talking less make my words more valuable. I own a few set of clothes which I wear at my office or whenever I go out. They serve both the purposes. I don’t get much craving for shopping for no reason. Similar thing goes for the shoes, belts, perfumes and other accessories.

I own a very old laptop (8 years old Asus) to work upon. It has got hinges broken and fractured twice. Only I know how to handle it. However, official laptop is there but I don’t use it for personal usage. I had water when I was hungry because I didn’t have the money for some reasons. Over four years of my career, I never asked anyone for a loan just because I was short on cash. I kept calm and waited for the money to flow in somehow.

I own only one credit card but rarely used it to book a flight once. I have kept it for emergencies only. That reminds me, I traveled in flight for the first time ever last month. I was happy with trains and buses. I got it claimed from the organization I joined. I started using bucket instead of showering some years back to save water bills. I never got craving to get drunk/smoke/drugs or anything of that sort just to look ‘cool’ although I have tried them.

There are so many things that I have left to live more. With time, I learned that nobody needs luxury to survive. It is just an extra cushion over the couch for showing off. When you learn to survive with the basics, you will value everything you will earn in future and that is the best lesson to learn in life. In my childhood, you never existed since I have my cricket bat and bunch of teammates to play with me.

You never existed because real world connections used to play the vital role than the virtual world connections. You never existed because I used to spend my most of the time with my parents. I never felt your presence because most of the time used to pass over the cute fights with my brother. I never felt your presence because weekend picnics or movies used to give me loads of excitement. I never felt your presence because of the evening walks with my mom was beautiful after hectic day in school. We talked so many things about my school day on the way back as she bought some groceries and vegetables for dinner.

Everything was happy when above mentioned things were only important for me in my life. as I entered into teenage, indirectly you started building your presence which I didn't realize initially, I started mentally separating from my parents, I used to spend most of my time in chatting with virtual friends, never cared or heard to parents about what they were saying.I used to feel shy to bring parents to my college premises just to hold a tag of tough guy. I used to get irritate on them for small small things and didn’t care whether they got hurt or not!!!

Basically I never cared about how lonely/alone they are feeling in my absence until and unless I came out of that adrenaline rush and entered into the Professional Life. Post College Life, enter professional life into my first job, I started to realize the presence of loneliness away from home, that virtual connections slowly got disappeared..without friends, No family touch and loneliness is my only companion from past many years. Till the day I got married. It likes me so much that It don’t wish to leave me from past years.

Being with you taught me how patient I am by spending whole time on that 6 x 6 bed in a small isolated empty room being away from people. Being with you made me travel alone even for 60 long hours in spine chilling weather conditions. I went to such a places during my travel where they was no proper connectivity, transport or nothing. Can you imagine I just used to sit like a pumpkin for more than 24 hours ideally so many times without mobile nor internet and off course sometimes with no food. I go on shopping with wife to shopping mall, restaurants, theaters and all the places she liked but I am still alone there although she enjoys the shopping.

I don’t make any attachment with people nor I feel to make because one day or other day everyone will leave you. So being alone taught me how strong and patient I am, there was a quote “You never know how strong you are, Until being strong is the only option. and I enjoy being a loner because life teaches you a lot when you are alone in life. I learned quite a few things being alone. That anything forever is a lie. Best friends are there but you are your's only friend. I enjoyed myself staying alone. You will get so many ideas staying alone. You will get more time to think, know yourself and understand yourself.

You will get to know who are friends whom to trust. You will find your talents and creativity in you. You will meet the right people in life when your are alone. No one really listen to you. They will wait for their turn to talk. If you trust someone, trust till the end, either you will get a very good friend or a good lesson. Friends you will learn not only by staying alone,.. Just stay away from Facebook and Whatsapp and all unnecessary contacts or groups.

Discipline is very important when you are alone. Your habits are what make you. With nobody to tell you, self discipline becomes the one thing which gets things done. You may go nuts, if you continue to be anti-social. Being holed up in your room is not going to help. Networking becomes extremely important. You come to know who are your friends.

You understand the meaning of loneliness whenever you feel it. You begin to understand a lot of people in your life. You become compassionate. Pleasantries and courtesies begin to matter. For eg, I will never forget the neighbouring aunty who offered me a glass of milk when I was feeling sick and alone at home. Or the person who inquired about my day. It's absolutely essential to keep your health in check. A first aid kit, pads, band aids, paracetamol, indigestion medicines well stocked just in case of need. You will begin to notice the friends who say they are coming to meet you/ concerned for your health when you are sick and the ones who actually do. Small talk becomes precious and you enjoy life. Cheers!