Living Without Growth Guilt

"The opposite of dying is growing. If you're not growing, you're dying."

These were some words I heard as I dove into a few episodes of Dave and Rachel Hollis, whom my wife had found inspirational and gave her some terrific structure to help guide her in reaching her business goals early on as she started up AB Marketing Studio. The announcement of the Hollis' divorce caused me to dive into research so I could brace myself for a conversation with my wife. I thought she might be devastated or it would impact her day-to-day. Luckily, it didn't. Although she enjoyed the events and new friends, my wife is able to pick the valuable nuggets and discard the fan-person behaviour that others can get upset about when celebrities' lives change.

But, it did open my eyes. This idea right away that GROWTH is the only solution to ______. Insert whatever. Happiness. A perfect marriage. A successful business. This got me thinking, especially in times of COVID, sometimes growth might be impossible, right? Or, in extreme cases, even harmful. For our most vulnerable in society, getting to work, having food, and taking care of health is a day-to-day challenge to overcome in an extreme growth society. Seeking security and stability is No. 1.

Aside from our personal obsessions with growth, COVID has taught us our economies built on unlimited growth can crash instantly. Yes, things will bounce back, but what has COVID taught us that may be coming? Less travel? Too much space and money/subsidies given to cars vs. people? The importance of public health and open data vs. proprietary and disparate competing systems? The relationship with STUFF over our relationship with LIFE may change.

"We can challenge ourselves to buy less. It could be that the more clothing we have and the more we buy into fast fashion, it’s less likely those clothes will carry meaning for us."

Not only is the thirst for things, push our desire for growth, but the need for big moments. As in marriage, work and life, those moments can be few and far between for most of us. Post-COVID, the date nights, sporting and concert events as well as travel and consumer spending may return for the most privileged, but even those moments are bookended by day after day. After day. After day. Of grinding, monotonous, simple, yet important moments with spouses, children, coworkers or even solitary work or exercise. Can we begin to feel happy without seeking unstoppable growth?

Can we begin to feel happy without seeking unstoppable growth?

This realization of go-go-grow culminated when I stumbled on this webinar presented by UNO professor and former Calgarian Dr. Erin Bass. In the context of corporate strategy, she spoke of the environmental outside impacts that may make you as a leader need to reassess growth strategies at all times. She listed two others: stability and retrenchment.

And although Dr. Bass was talking corporate strategy, I thought it fit with this concept of life and that we can't always, every day, every hour, be obsessed with growth of self, our family and our teams. It can become unhealthy.

The growth obsession can become in direct conflict with our desire to live or take advantage of others to get ahead. During the COVID19 pandemic, this was put into hyper-focus. For example, our businesses lost revenue. Clients parted ways. Profits and revenue shrank or ceased to exist. Personally, for those of us who kept jobs, our health, food security and basic needs had us seeking stability and retreating into new norms at home taking care of children or loved ones in new ways. Work was transitioning to remote, or for some, creating stability for others in their essential jobs in healthcare, civic duties or food supply.

Although we are far from done this pandemic, when we eventually do pull through, I wonder if the vast majority will bounce back to seeking growth 24/7 only for the majority to be let down by the next recession, a missed promotion or opportunity, less money on the pay cheque, or a new a job title with Director/VP in it. That can be uncomfortable moment for some to admit, it's OK. As much as the Hollises thought it was uncomfortable for everyone to seek growth. Maybe our desires to grow can sometimes block us from seeing what stability can do for your relationships, your work, your family or even your community.

After all, the opposite of dying isn't growing. It's simply living.