Living in the Past: Why We Should Stop Dwelling on What Was
(Vietnamese below - Xem n?i dung ti?ng Vi?t ? phía d??i)
Original article link?here
Living in the past is a major obstacle to change - it does no good to dwell on/ cling to your previous life and refuse to let it go, if your desire is to change the future and become a better version of yourself today. For those who would like to advance further on their journey towards self-mastery, learning to abandon this bad habit is crucial to making progress and moving forward.
What Does Living in the Past Mean?
The act of living in the past (also referred to as rumination, dwelling on/ clinging to the past) occurs when one becomes excessively preoccupied with past events - or maintains a belief that things would/ should remain the same as they were previously. This behavior can manifest in various ways, including:
What Makes a Person Live in the Past?
Have you ever wondered: "Why am I living in the past?". Numerous factors may contribute to one dwelling on past things/ mistakes/ negativities - some of the most notable reasons include:
When it comes to human behavior, there is a common notion among psychologists that states: "When it's hysterical, it's historical". Specifically, many of our emotional reactions - including the tendency to live in the past - are actually rooted in previous experiences.
For instance, if you possess perfectionistic tendencies or constantly seek approval, it may stem from your parents never acknowledging your worthiness.
If you exhibit a sense of superiority and believe you will never do anything wrong, it could be a result of your parents showering you with excessive praise, fostering an inflated sense of self-importance.
Those who have undergone traumatic events often struggle to let go of the past. They may continuously relive the traumatic experience in their minds or live in a perpetual state of fear, dreading its recurrence. Reflecting on - and addressing - such unresolved matters is necessary to facilitate the release of the past's hold.
An example is when one experiences the loss of a loved one - in this case, moving on from their grief should prove challenging. Or,?one who was constantly bullied in school might become cautious of other people and likely to withhold information - both to protect himself from potential personal attacks, and to gain an edge over others.
A deep-seated fear of the uncertain is a reason why people seek solace in the past. They may perceive the future as uncontrollable, prompting them to resist change and grasp onto how things were/ have been.
For instance, managers who are used to the command-and-control style may be reluctant to relinquish their authority - even when they are fully aware of the benefits of empowering other team members. They may worry that others will not be able to make decisions on their own - or that they will make mistakes. They hold on tightly to the delusion that "I have succeeded by telling people what to do - there is no reason for me to embrace a new approach to leading the organization".
The allure of nostalgia may contribute to the habit of living in the past, as people immerse themselves in fond memories, often idealizing bygone times. When faced with difficulties, one may cling to previous positive experiences or successes as a means to avoid the present harsh realities or responsibilities.
A good example is when a person who is struggling with their current job may reminisce about their time in college - when they were carefree and successful. They may idealize that time period and compare it unfavorably to their current situation, which makes them become discouraged and unmotivated.
A pervasive negative mindset can anchor us in the past, impeding our ability to embrace positivity and growth. When one persistently fills themselves with destructive emotions - such as regret, grudge and bitterness, it becomes extremely challenging for them to embrace the present, make progress and move forward.
An overwhelming desire to preserve one's self-identity - to be "me" - is a common factor that hinders personal growth and perpetuates clinging to the past. For instance, a manager who has always been regarded as a "tough" guy may be reluctant to hand out praises for fearing that it will make him appear unauthentic (even when he is aware of the beneficial effects of giving compliments).
Why Living in the Past is Bad
"Is dwelling on the past bad?" - some may ask. It is true that occasional and purposeful reminiscing may bring about positive effects - such as fostering gratitude for the present, drawing lessons from experiences, cherishing memories, and reconnecting with one's core values. However, when reminiscing becomes a habitual tendency or a means of escape from the present, it becomes a problem we need to worry about.
Below are some major dangers of living in the past:
Constantly fixating on the past inhibits personal growth and prevents one from moving forward. The inability to fully let go of previous events hinders progress in life - while at the same time evoking feelings of sadness, regret, and anger. Over time, continually reflecting on negative experiences will exact a toll on one's mental well-being.
Another problem with dwelling on the past is how it distorts one's perception, veiling present circumstances with idealized or romanticized notions. This twisted view may lead to unrealistic expectations, dissatisfaction, and resentment.
Endlessly comparing oneself to a past version engenders a sense of inadequacy - which results in diminished self-esteem and a lack of confidence. By fixating on what has happened or what could have been, one neglects the opportunities and possibilities available in the present.
Moreover, this detrimental habit also hinders the cultivation of meaningful relationships, pursuit of goals, and fulfillment of responsibilities - ultimately leading to dissatisfaction, regret and strained connections.
Focusing on past mistakes, failures, losses, and traumas breeds feelings of sadness, anger, guilt, shame, and resentment. These emotions permeate one's mood, motivation, and self-confidence, while also impairing coping mechanisms when faced with stress and challenges.
A preoccupation with the past stifles openness to new experiences, ideas, and perspectives. It fosters resistance to change, averse to risk-taking, and settling for less than what one deserves. Additionally, repeating patterns of behavior that led to past circumstances or avoiding situations reminiscent of them stifles learning, growth, and the discovery of new possibilities.
Living in the Past - The Obstacle That Prevents You From Getting There
(Compiled with inspiration from the bestseller 'What got you here won't get you there' by world-class executive coach - Dr. Marshall Goldsmith)
As shared by Dr. Goldsmith, he once worked with a client who would spend countless hours lamenting about his problems, often relating them to his family history. After enduring this incessant whining, Goldsmith finally reached his limit and handed the individual a quarter, remarking, "Here's a quarter. Call someone who cares."
Reflecting on what has happened is not inherently problematic - in fact, it can be a valuable process if the objective is to come to terms with it. To understand why we got HERE.
However, if the goal is to shape the future - to get THERE, dwelling on the past will do nothing good.
During his coaching career, working with clients who cling tightly to their past, desiring to unravel the mysteries of why they are the way they are, has always been one of Dr. Goldsmith's greatest challenges. Convincing them that the past cannot be altered, rewritten, or used as an excuse is a lengthy process. The only option available to them is acceptance and moving forward.
What's really interesting is - many people derive satisfaction from living in the past, particularly when it allows them to assign blame to others for the misfortunes they have experienced. In this case, the inclination to dwell on the past manifests as an even more worrying interpersonal problem, in which previous events are adopted as a "weapon" against others.
On the other hand, we also hold on to the past in order to juxtapose it with the present, often with the intention of highlighting our own virtues at the expense of others. A classic example is when people start a conversation with something like: "When I was your age..."
What really is the trigger behind such a behavior?
When making excuses, we attribute our failures to someone or something beyond our control. We refuse to hold ourselves accountable - instead, we point the finger at anyone but ourselves.
Sometimes, we blame others not to justify our failures, but as a subtle way of boasting about our successes.
Dr. Goldsmith confessed that he too once fell prey to this detrimental habit. Years ago, he suffered from a profound professional setback - which caused him to later that day return home and unleash his frustrations upon his daughter, Kelly: "When I was your age..." It was a self-indulgent monologue, aimed at highlighting the arduous and gloomy aspects of his own childhood in stark contrast to the idyllic upbringing his children had been enjoying.
As for his daughter Kelly, she just patiently listened to him - until he finally finished his talk, when she replied:
"Daddy, it's not my fault you make money."
It was at that moment that Dr. Goldsmith realized the profound truth in her statement. How could he expect her to comprehend the struggles of poverty - when he had deliberately worked to shield her from that harsh reality? He then recognized the fallacy in his actions - and the unfair burden he had placed upon his daughter.
I don’t have much patience with "therapy" that clings to the past - because going backwards is not about creating change. It’s about understanding.
Marshall Goldsmith
For those who are interested, please check out the rest of the article here:?https://vncmd.com/en/insights/living-in-the-past/
CONNECT WITH DR. MARSHALL GOLDSMITH AT ITD'S UPCOMING GLOBAL LEADERSHIP TEAM CONFERENCE (GLTC) 2023
The?Global Leadership Team Conference?(GLTC) is designed to give attendees a unique perspective on how to develop innovative strategies for success in today’s global business environment. Our conference brings together 4 of the world’s most accomplished and innovative thought leaders, who will share their knowledge, expertise, and best practices on a range of topics.
(English above)
Link bài g?c:?Xem t?i ?ay
S?ng trong quá kh? là tr? ng?i l?n ??i v?i quá trình phát tri?n chính mình - s? ch?ng ích l?i gì khi c? bám víu vào cu?c s?ng tr??c ?ay và t? ch?i bu?ng b? nó, n?u mong mu?n c?a b?n là thay ??i t??ng lai và tr? thành m?t phiên b?n t?t h?n so v?i hi?n t?i. ??i v?i nh?ng ai mong mu?n ti?n xa trên hành trình làm ch? b?n than, h?c cách t? b? thói quen x?u này là yêu c?u r?t quan tr?ng ?? có th? v??n lên và ti?n v? phía tr??c.
领英推荐
Th? nào là s?ng trong quá kh??
S?ng trong quá kh? là khi ta b?n tam quá m?c v?i các s? ki?n trong quá kh? - ho?c c?ng nh?c v?i ni?m tin r?ng m?i th? s?/nên ???c gi? nguyên nh? tr??c ?ay. Hành vi này có th? bi?u hi?n theo nhi?u hình th?c khác nhau nh?:
Vi?c ??m chìm trong suy ngh? v? quá kh? th??ng g?i lên c?m giác hoài ni?m, nu?i d??ng ?o t??ng r?ng cu?c s?ng tr??c ?ay ??n gi?n và vui v? h?n. Thái ?? này là nguyên nhan gay c?n tr? kh? n?ng s?ng cho hi?n t?i và ki?n t?o t??ng lai t?t ??p h?n.
Nguyên nhan c?a hành vi s?ng trong quá kh?
?? bao gi? b?n t? h?i: “T?i sao t?i l?i có thói quen s?ng trong quá kh??”. Có nhi?u y?u t? có th? góp ph?n khi?n m?t ng??i r?i vào tr?ng thái ??m chìm trong nh?ng v?n ??/l?i l?m/tiêu c?c c?a quá kh? - bao g?m:
Nghiên c?u tam ly h?c ?? ch? ra r?ng, ph?n l?n các ph?n ?ng c?m xúc c?a chúng ta - bao g?m c? xu h??ng s?ng trong quá kh? - th?c s? ??u có ngu?n g?c sau xa t? nh?ng tr?i nghi?m tr??c ?ay.
Ch?ng h?n, vi?c b?n có khuynh h??ng c?u toàn/ liên t?c mu?n ???c ng??i khác c?ng nh?n có th? xu?t phát t? vi?c cha m? b?n kh?ng bao gi? th?a nh?n n?ng l?c/ n? l?c c?a b?n cách x?ng ?áng.
N?u b?n hay t? cao và tin r?ng mình s? kh?ng bao gi? làm ?i?u gì sai trái, thì ?ó có th? là k?t qu? c?a vi?c cha m? th??ng xuyên khen ng?i b?n quá m?c.
Nh?ng ai t?ng tr?i qua nhi?u "sóng gió" trong ??i nhìn chung g?p r?t nhi?u khó kh?n trong vi?c bu?ng b? quá kh?. H? r?t d? h?i t??ng l?i tr?i nghi?m ?au th??ng ho?c s?ng trong tr?ng thái s? h?i th??ng tr?c. Vi?c suy ng?m – và gi?i quy?t – nh?ng v?n ?? này là yêu c?u c?n thi?t ?? th?c s? bu?ng b? ???c.
Ví d?: M?t ng??i th??ng xuyên b? b?t n?t khi còn nh? có th? khi l?n lên s? tr? nên khép kín, gi?u ngh? và t? ch?i chia s? th?ng tin – v?i m?c ?ích v?a ?? b?o v? b?n than kh?i b? t?n c?ng cá nhan, v?a ?? giành l?i th? h?n ng??i khác.
N?i s? h?i sau xa ??i v?i nh?ng b?t ??nh c?a t??ng lai là ly do t?i sao nhi?u ng??i ch?ng l?i thay ??i và tìm ki?m s? an ?i trong quá kh?.
L?y ví d?, m?t c?p qu?n ly ?? quen v?i phong cách ra l?nh và ki?m soát (command-and-control) truy?n th?ng có th? mi?n c??ng t? b? quy?n h?n cá nhan - ngay c? khi h? nh?n th?c ??y ?? v? l?i ích c?a vi?c trao quy?n cho các thành viên trong nhóm. Có th? thái ?? ?ó xu?t phát t? m?i lo nhan viên s? kh?ng th? t? mình ??a ra quy?t ??nh - ho?c h? s? ph?m ph?i sai l?m. H? bám ch?t vào ?o t??ng r?ng “T?i ?? thành c?ng v?i ph??ng pháp l?nh ??o tr??c ?ay - kh?ng có ly do gì ?? t?i ph?i ch?p nh?n m?t cách ti?p c?n m?i c?”.
Suy ngh? hoài ni?m góp ph?n kh?ng nh? hình thành nên thói quen s?ng trong quá kh? - khi ta chìm ??m trong nh?ng ky ?c c? và "ly t??ng hóa" nh?ng gì ?? qua. Khi ??i m?t v?i khó kh?n, nhi?u ng??i có th? bám víu vào nh?ng tr?i nghi?m tích c?c ho?c thành c?ng tr??c ?ay - nh? m?t ph??ng ti?n ?? tr?n tránh th?c t? ho?c trách nhi?m hi?n t?i.
Ví d?: M?t ng??i ?ang g?p khó kh?n v?i c?ng vi?c hi?n t?i có th? h?i t??ng v? thành c?ng trên gh? gi?ng ???ng - so sánh kho?ng th?i gian t?t ??p ?ó v?i th?i ?i?m hi?n t?i. H? qu? là h? càng tr? nên chán n?n và m?t ??ng l?c trong c?ng vi?c.
T? duy tiêu c?c là m?t nguyên nhan "neo gi?" chúng ta v?i quá kh?, c?n tr? kh? n?ng suy ngh? tích c?c và phát tri?n chính mình. Khi liên t?c l?p ??y b?n than b?ng nh?ng c?m xúc tiêu c?c - h?i ti?c, ác c?m và cay ??ng - r?t khó ?? chúng ta ch?p nh?n th?c t?i, h?c cách thay ??i và ti?n v? phía tr??c.
Cu?i cùng, cái t?i c?ng là m?t y?u t? c?n tr? s? phát tri?n cá nhan và d?n ??n tình tr?ng bám víu vào quá kh?. Ví d?, m?t ng??i qu?n ly lu?n ???c coi là “c?ng r?n” có th? mi?n c??ng ??a ra nh?ng l?i khen ng?i - s? r?ng ?i?u ?ó s? khi?n anh ta tr?ng gi? t?o (ngay c? khi y th?c ??y ?? l?i ích c?a vi?c mình làm).
Tác h?i c?a thói quen s?ng trong quá kh?
“S?ng trong quá kh? thì có x?u kh?ng?"
?úng là h?i t??ng v? nh?ng s? ki?n ?? qua có th? mang l?i nh?ng tác ??ng tích c?c – ch?ng h?n nh? nu?i d??ng lòng bi?t ?n ??i v?i hi?n t?i, rút ra bài h?c kinh nghi?m, tran tr?ng ky ?c và k?t n?i v?i các giá tr? c?t l?i c?a chính mình. Tuy nhiên, khi h?i t??ng tr? thành m?t thói quen l?p ?i l?p l?i - ho?c m?t ph??ng ti?n tr?n tránh hi?n t?i, ?ó là lúc chúng ta ph?i th?c s? suy ngh? nghiêm túc v? nó.
D??i ?ay là m?t s? tác h?i chính c?a vi?c s?ng m?i trong quá kh?:
Liên t?c ??m chìm trong quá kh? là nguyên nhan kìm h?m s? phát tri?n cá nhan, ng?n tr? ta ti?n v? phía tr??c khi lu?n b? chi ph?i b?i c?m giác bu?n b?, h?i ti?c và t?c gi?n. Theo th?i gian, vi?c th??ng xuyên suy ng?m v? nh?ng tr?i nghi?m tiêu c?c s? ?nh h??ng nghiêm tr?ng ??n s?c kh?e tinh th?n c?a m?i cá nhan.
M?t v?n ?? khác c?a vi?c s?ng trong quá kh? là gay "méo mó" nh?n th?c c?a con ng??i, thay th? hoàn c?nh th?c t?i b?ng nh?ng quan ni?m ???c ly t??ng/ l?ng m?n hóa. H? qu? theo sau ?ó là nh?ng k? v?ng kh?ng th?c t?, thái ?? kh?ng hài lòng và oán gi?n.
Kh?ng ng?ng so sánh b?n than v?i chính mình trong quá kh? s? khi?n ta c?m th?y kém c?i - làm gi?m sút lòng t? tr?ng và ni?m tin vào b?n than. Khi ch? t?p trung vào nh?ng gì ?? x?y ra/ có th? x?y ra, ta ??ng th?i ?ánh m?t y th?c v? nh?ng c? h?i và ti?m n?ng ? th?c t?i.
H?n n?a, thói quen x?u này c?ng gay c?n tr? vi?c nu?i d??ng các m?i quan h? có y ngh?a, theo ?u?i m?c tiêu và hoàn thành trách nhi?m – d?n ??n s? kh?ng hài lòng, h?i ti?c và các m?i quan h? c?ng th?ng sau này.
Vi?c h??ng s? chú tam vào nh?ng sai l?m, th?t b?i, m?t mát và ch?n th??ng trong quá kh? s? nu?i d??ng c?m giác bu?n b?, t?c gi?n, t?i l?i, x?u h? và oán gi?n. Qua th?i gian, nh?ng c?m xúc này s? tác ??ng t?i tam tr?ng, ??ng l?c và s? t? tin, khi?n ta g?p r?t nhi?u khó kh?n khi ??i m?t v?i c?ng th?ng và th? thách trong cu?c s?ng.
Khi quá b?n tam v?i quá kh?, ta c?ng ??ng th?i "?óng c?a" v?i nh?ng tr?i nghi?m, y t??ng và quan ?i?m m?i. Hành vi s?ng trong quá kh? d?n t?i tình tr?ng ch?ng l?i thay ??i, kh?ng thích r?i ro và kh?ng s?n sàng n? l?c ??t t?i thành qu? x?ng ?áng, c?n tr? kh? n?ng h?c h?i, phát tri?n và khám phá các c? h?i m?i...
S?ng trong quá kh? - Tr? ng?i l?n trên hành trình thay ??i
Trong tác ph?m 'What got you here won't get you there', TS. Marshall Goldsmith - chuyên gia executive coaching hàng ??u th? gi?i - chia s? v? vi?c m?t trong nh?ng khách hàng ??u tiên c?a ?ng lu?n dành hàng gi? ?? than v?n v?i ?ng:
“Marshall, anh kh?ng hi?u. ?? t?i gi?i thích ly do t?i sao t?i g?p ph?i nh?ng v?n ?? này. T?t c? ??u do cha và m? t?i..."
Và c? th?, anh ta tu?n m?t tràng "liên tu b?t t?n" v? nh?ng ?au kh? trong quá kh? - mà anh cho là nguyên nhan d?n t?i tình tr?ng hi?n t?i c?a mình. Cho ??n lúc cu?i cùng, Goldsmith quy?t ??nh thò tay vào túi l?y m?t ??ng xu và ??a cho anh ta:
“?ay, 25 xu c?a anh ?ay. H?y s? d?ng nó mà g?i cho ai quan tam t?i nh?ng gì anh mu?n nói.”
Nh? ?? ?? c?p, vi?c dành th?i gian suy ng?m v? quá kh? kh?ng có gì là x?u c? - n?u m?c ?ích c?a b?n là ch?p nh?n quá kh?. Nh?ng n?u mong mu?n c?a b?n là thay ??i t??ng lai, thì vi?c ??m chìm trong nh?ng gì ?? qua s? kh?ng mang l?i l?i ích gì c?.
Kh?ng ai có th? thay ??i, vi?t l?i hay bào ch?a cho quá kh? c?. T?t c? nh?ng gì ta có th? làm là ch?p nh?n và b??c ?i ti?p.
Th? nh?ng - vì r?t nhi?u ly do, chúng ta v?n th??ng thích s?ng trong quá kh?, ??c bi?t n?u ?i?u ?ó cho phép ta ?? l?i cho hoàn c?nh v? b?t c? ?i?u b?t m?n gì trong cu?c s?ng hi?n t?i. Nói cách khác, chúng ta s? d?ng quá kh? nh? m?t "v? khí" ?? ch?ng l?i ng??i khác.
Ngoài ra, vi?c bám víu vào quá kh? và ??i chi?u nó v?i hi?n t?i còn là m?t cách ?? làm n?i b?t ?i?u gì ?ó tích c?c v? b?n than mình - trong khi "h? th?p" giá tr? c?a ng??i khác.
?? bao gi? b?n t?ng b?t ??u m?t cau chuy?n dài v? b?n than v?i m?t cau m? ??u ??i lo?i nh?: “Ngày x?a, khi t?i b?ng tu?i b?n...”
?ay có l? là thói quen x?u mà r?t nhi?u b?c cha m?/ c?p qu?n ly m?c ph?i - khi ta so sánh th?c t?i v?i nh?ng thành c?ng/ khó kh?n t?ng tr?i qua trong quá kh?, v?i m?c ?ích chính là "t?n vinh" chính mình.
Nh? TS. Goldsmith chia s?, chính ?ng c?ng t?ng ph?m ph?i t?t x?u này - và r?t may, chính con gái ?ng, Kelly, ?? giúp ?ng nh?n th?c ???c ?i?u ?ó.
"Chuy?n x?y ra khi Kelly m?i 7 tu?i. M?t h?m, b?c b?i vì th?t b?i trong c?ng vi?c, t?i v? nhà và trút s? khó ch?u c?a mình lên Kelly. T?i thuy?t m?t tràng v?i con gái t?i r?ng: 'Khi cha b?ng tu?i con...'. ?ó là m?t "bài gi?ng" ??y t?c t?i, v? vi?c tu?i th? c?a t?i khó kh?n và kh?n kh? nh? th? nào so v?i vi?c Kelly bay gi? ???c chu c?p ??y ?? và kh?ng ph?i lo l?ng gì c?.
T?i b?t ??u b?ng cách nói v? vi?c ?? l?n lên ? m?t tr?m x?ng Kentucky th? nào, v? hoàn c?nh túng thi?u khi ?ó - r?ng t?i ?? ph?i n? l?c ra sao ?? tr? thành ng??i ??u tiên trong gia ?ình t?t nghi?p ??i h?c. T?t nhiên, ?i?u này trái ng??c hoàn toàn v?i t?t c? nh?ng ?i?u tuy?t v?i mà Kelly hi?n có.
Con gái t?i kiên nh?n l?ng nghe, ?? t?i ???c trút h?t b?c d?c. Khi t?i nói xong, Kelly tr? l?i:
“B? ?i, vi?c b? ki?m ???c ti?n kh?ng ph?i l?i c?a con.”
Chính cau nói ?ó khi?n t?i gi?t mình t?nh ng?: “Kelly nói ?úng”. Làm sao t?i có th? mong ??i con t?i hi?u ???c th? nào là nghèo khó - trong khi t?i ch?c ch?n r?ng nó s? kh?ng bao gi? tr?i qua hoàn c?nh nh? v?y?
T?i ?? l?a ch?n làm vi?c ch?m ch? và ki?m ti?n. Con t?i thì kh?ng.
Trên th?c t?, chính t?i ?ang khoe khoang v? vi?c mình ?? ph?i v?t v? nh? th? nào và th?ng minh ra sao khi v??t lên ngh?ch c?nh l?n nh? v?y - và che gi?u thái ?? ng?o m?n ?ó b?ng cách trút s? th?t v?ng c?a mình lên con c?a mình. May m?n thay, con t?i ?? giúp t?i nh?n ra ?i?u ?ó."
T?i kh?ng b?n tam l?m v?i các “li?u pháp tr? li?u” h??ng v? quá kh? - b?i vì chúng ch? mang l?i hi?u bi?t, ch? kh?ng t?o ra s? thay ??i.
Marshall Goldsmith
B?n ??c quan tam có th? ??c ph?n ti?p theo c?a bài vi?t t?i link sau:?https://vncmd.com/chuyen-de/coaching-mentoring/song-trong-qua-khu/
K?T N?I TR?C TI?P V?I TS. GOLDMSITH T?I H?I NGH? L?NH ??O TH??NG ??NH TOàN C?U - GLOBAL LEADERSHIP TEAM CONFERENCE (GLTC) 2023
H?i ngh? L?nh ??o Toàn c?u?Global Leadership Team Conference?(GLTC)?c?a ITD World là s? ki?n hàng ??u dành cho nhà l?nh ??o và giám ??c ?i?u hành c?p cao mu?n h?c h?i thêm ki?n th?c và chi?n l??c ?? ??t ???c thành c?ng b?n v?ng – trong b?i c?nh m?i tr??ng kinh doanh thay ??i nhanh chóng nh? hi?n nay!