Live Your Life For You

So many people in this world are living their lives for other people. They have chosen jobs or careers or lifestyles to impress or appease their parents, friends or family. They basically let someone else dictate what they do for work and how they live their life. This is true for every person who wanted to be an artist or musician or athlete or architect or entrepreneur, but their parents told them they need to get a “safe” or lucrative job like doctor or lawyer or accountant instead.

There is nothing wrong with those jobs. Most of them pay well and provide some great security. And for some people those jobs are their dream and that’s what they truly want to be doing. But many people end up in jobs because that is what their parents tell them to do and they don’t want to disappoint their parents.

I have been through this as well. And I don’t want to take anything away from what your parents or family have given your or done for you. They probably raised you and fed you and maybe they even paid for your college tuition. But unless you took out a loan from them or promised them something in return, you don’t actually owe them anything. And the entire point of this book is that you take ownership of your career and life and live life for you and nobody else, so you may see me harp on this a few times.

I have been there. After college, I moved across the country and discovered entrepreneurship and tried some things that probably scared my parents. And I was always worried about disappointing them. But I continued to live life for me and do what I want, and I have never regretted that.

I bring this up because you may be in a job or career that you don’t enjoy or is not part of your long-term vision and if this chapter of the book has caused you to start to think of other things you can do, I think that’s great. But you’ve got to be prepared for some potential judgement or pushback from your parents, family and friends who might not agree with your decisions. Remember, it’s not their life. It’s yours.

You can tell them that while you value their experience and advice, and you appreciate their love and support, you ultimately get to decide what you want to do with your life and your current dream or desire is to do X.

They may not like it but if they truly love you, they will always be there to support you.

I know this is hard, so if you need extra motivation, consider this: I strongly believe that at the end of your life, your biggest regret(s) will be the dreams you didn’t fulfill and chances you didn’t take. You probably won’t sit around reflecting happily on how you played it safe or did what other people (your parents) told you to do. More than likely you’ll lament the chances you didn’t take, the times you didn’t stand or speak up for yourself or the times you did what other people wanted you to do instead of what you truly wanted to do.

This is what drives me every day and motivates me to take chances and do scary things. And this is why I continue to try to find ways to inspire and motivate others to take ownership of their careers and lives. I want you to live life for you. 

I hope this causes you to think about how you are living your life or why you've chosen your job or career and if you may want to make changes down the road. And if you decide you are not in the job or career you truly want, spend time reflecting, writing and planning and getting feedback from those you trust. No matter how old you are, you are still young and you can still make changes.

Best of luck!

This is an excerpt from the draft of my forthcoming book, 'Own Your Career, Own Your life'