Live With Authenticity and Integrity

What does it mean to live authentically?

I recently had a call with a client that when asked "what are we celebrating/what are you proud of?" they sat in silence for ~30-seconds and answered honestly with, 'I am in a headspace where there is nothing I can come up with'.

This is a common theme for people who subconsciously tend to focus on what's not going well. In the stress/brain study world, they call it negative bias. Completely normal AND makes appreciative inquiry hard. Appreciative inquiry is a vital practice for all of us to implement regularly.

After ~10-minutes of talking, we discovered that the root of this client's disconnect, overwhelm, anger and defeat was the realization that they DO more than they BE with an expectation to validate whom they are seen as.

Examples: I eat all the healthy foods, I exercise every day, I journal, I meditate, I sleep well YET I AM NOT LOSING WEIGHT/I DON'T LOOK LIKE I WANT TO.

I reflected to this client what I heard and they confirmed that it was spot on.

Here this person was doing all the things they thought they needed to do to feel a certain way but when they spoke about all the things they were doing it came from an obligatory standpoint. Almost as if they didn't have a choice nor opportunity. When in fact they did. We all do.

Which brings me to the crucks of this conversation, authenticity.

This person realized in this session that almost everything they do in their day-to-day comes from a space of 'should' 'need' 'have' to based on what they have either heard, been told, or believe to be true to be seen a certain way.

When we do this - not only is there stress associated with the doing but also a subtle resentment and relying on external validation will always disappoint and discourage.

If you are not able to live life authentically what is the intention of living?

The concept and conversation of 'what does it mean to live authentically?' comes up a lot. And I would be lying if I said that most people are crystal clear on what that is. Which makes this message even more important...

If you cannot connect, visualize &/or answer what living authentically looks like, and feels like - be sure to give yourself grace in the process of creating a new way of thinking, being, and conquering the day with harmony.

Whenever we are creating a new identity or new way of showing up - it takes time, effort, and compassion. Start by observing what you do and check-in; do you do it because you want to or because somewhere along the road you were societally conditioned to believe that you need to/should do?

Each morning ask, what is the most intentional action I can take today that will enable me to show up authentically?

Who do you know that needs to read this today? Create a ripple effect, and share it!

Alyssa Poggioli

Life, Leadership, Connection, and Executive Coach

https://linkin.bio/alyssapoggioli