LinkedIn patrons relieved at Pew findings?

In its latest research into the social media habits of American teens, Pew Research Center uncovered a fact that is rumoured to be warmly welcomed by patrons of LinkedIn:

Teenagers have yet to discover LinkedIn

The above bar graph from the Pew Research survey lists the specific online platforms the teenagers were asked about. Upon reviewing these 10 brand names, it is apparent that LinkedIn is not among them. When asked to clarify why this was the case, it is rumoured that an anonymous source at an organisation that cannot be named said:

"We can neither confirm nor deny that."

I reached out to the aforementioned organisation that shall remain unknown, and asked somebody/ anybody to clarify what it was they could neither confirm nor deny. I received:

In trying to establish the veracity of this potentially fake news, I (possibly) contacted Ethan Hunt, a rumoured member of what may or may not be known as the Impossible Mission Force – abbreviated as IMF, which should not to be confused with the International Monetary Fund . I'm still working on confirming or denying the hypothesis that LinkedIn patrons are relieved at this survey of American teenagers ages 13 to 17?from Pew.

PS August is known as the 'silly season' by some. Please take my above post in the manner in which I wrote it = with a smattering of sarcasm, humour and silliness! Sarcastic, silly, and humorous comments are welcomed.