Limping towards the finish line of 2020

Limping towards the finish line of 2020

I'm totally and utterly knackered - and my guess is that you are too. It seems that every single person I speak to is dragging themselves towards the Christmas break. There's something magical about that particular break - I think it's because so many of us stop at the same time, so there's less guilt attached to doing nothing. When I take a break in the middle of the year I always end up feeling like I'm wagging school. There's that nagging need to check the email or the phone messages and that background guilt that others are working so I should be too.

Ironically, the guilt has gotten worse since I started working for myself. When you're in traditional employment, annual leave is an accepted part of the deal so you switch off and enjoy. When you work for yourself, your brain keeps telling you you're never 'done'. There's one more client to call or article to write or whatever.

I'm beginning to realise that I'm my own worst enemy on the subject of guilt. I've been working towards this 'end game' for my career for decades - where I can do the work I want the way I want with the people I want - and I'm genuinely thrilled that it has become a reality. But something in me is always telling me I should be doing more in those moments when I want to be able to switch off and enjoy - and now I'm slightly panicking that I'm never going to get to a point where I actually enjoy the life I've been working towards - that's a scary thought.

There's one thing I've loved about this year and that is that we suddenly have permission to be human. We now have kids and pets and messy zoom backgrounds and wear fluffy socks and eat too much chocolate - and it's all ok. That's a relief.

I'd love to be able to end this piece of random rambling with some kind of profound life lesson or whatever, but the reality is I don't have a clue what that is, other than self-compassion in ever greater amounts and a note to self that it is ok to stop.

My deep thanks to every one of the people who have touched my life this year. Every real, raw, connected conversation, every virtual hug, every moment of laughter or tears and sometimes both at once. We're all flawed, we're all struggling, we're all bone-deep exhausted.

It's ok to stop. See you in 2021 xx

Matt McDonald

Business Strategy & Risk Management Consultant | Executive Coach | Melbourne, Australia

3 年

Its perfectly ok to admit that we are all "cooked"... especially those of us who went through extended lockdowns. But next year will be a different story. It always is !

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Gary Prince

??Medical Affairs Excellence??Segmentation and Targeting??Scientific Exchange??Gallup Strengths??60Seconds Coach

4 年

You've written exactly how I feel, right now, with the addition that I feel utterly betrayed by those I have done work for, added value and given counsel, yet not been paid at year end.

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Cynthia Munro

Director, Coach, Consultant and Facilitator at C Squared Consulting Limited (C2Consulting)

4 年

Totally can relate to your thoughts.

Sian Stephens

People and Culture Specialist | Leadership and Management Development | Business Wellbeing | Group Mentoring | Employee Engagement | Co-designing productive stress free high performing businesses

4 年

Well said Fiona Robertson have a relaxing Christmas and here's to a peaceful New Year ????

Mary Tan

Event Solutions to Create Lasting Impressions & Experiences | Spreading joy of Singapore Food | PCO | Event Manager

4 年

Thank you Fiona Robertson. It's as if you have read my mind! You have absolutely hit the nail on its head! Enjoy the festive season and relax/rest/reset. Have a great Christmas.

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