Is Likability Essential - Is It Important to be a Clone With a Permanent Grin?

A seasoned Corporate C level executive from a Fortune 100 company recently told me that in his 30+ years of experience, if he had learnt one thing, it was that given a choice between being liked and being respected for his performance, he'd always prefer to be liked. This took me by surprise for a variety of reasons.

The link between a happy team and a productive culture has been well documented. Collaboration is easier, staff retention is higher and people come to work with a smile on their faces. In the tough times that we live in, this is vital for the success of any company. We are often told that one of the key factors in a cohesive team is the likability of its members.

However, a brief glimpse around us shows that not everyone is so likable. In my 7 years helping grow a company from near nothing to now 1500 people and a $3.5 Billion market cap, I have hired, fired, mentored, coached, led and observed a large number of people of all personality types, many of them very closely and across every possible skill set needed to grow and work in a digital media company.

Lately, I have been observing a trend everywhere of people trying very hard to "fit in" to the popular culture within corporations just to be liked, even if it comes at the cost of performance. I suppose it's human nature to be part of and expected to be liked by their teams, groups or any social networks they may be a part of at work. But not everyone can be.

To some people it comes naturally – they are social butterflies, flitting in and out of the office circles with ease, spreading positivity with every emoticon in their emails and often going out of their way to help others. Others are drawn to them and feed off their relentless optimism. They may be good at their jobs, or they may not. Often it doesn't matter because they are liked so everything else tends to be overlooked.

Others try their best to be a team player, going out of their way to help others. They make an effort, sometimes against their nature, to support others and create a pleasant working atmosphere. They are harmonious and unobtrusive colleagues and probably form the majority of any typical office.

Then, there are the less “likable” individuals. They might have certain personality traits that make them hard to co-operate with. They might take a more self-centered approach to work, often not going out of their way to help others if it is not part of their job description. They might simply not “fit in” with everyone else – they are there to do their jobs, not become a clone of everyone else with a permanent grin on their faces.

However, it can sometimes happen that these “unliked” individuals can be the most productive. They come to work, concentrate on their job and can be some of the most valued people in terms of adding to the financial bottom line. This is where a distinction must be made – there is undoubtedly a cultural “bottom line” – where the “feel-good factor” resides – but the true bottom line should not be forgotten. At the end of the day, this is what ultimately dictates the fortunes of any company.

In the search for cultural fit and conformity, recruiting and HR departments are in danger of forgetting this second factor. Hiring for culture and attitude is great, but hiring for results and effectiveness should not be forgotten. Ok, someone is a little surly by nature, but if they are the most qualified candidate and have an impeccable record of delivery, should they really be discarded?

This is a fine line - if too many people feel that it is ok to act in their own best interests rather than follow the company cultural norms, there will be anarchy. However, if companies unfailingly put personality ahead of performance, they will lose out on some star contributors who simply aren’t so “likable.”

I believe that it goes back to the diversity argument. The more diverse the team, the better the chances of success. If a team is filled with lovely “likable” people, the hard truths may not be said and failures may not be acknowledged. You need a mix of personalities to complement each other. The “miserable sorts” are often unafraid to call a spade a spade – you don’t make much money with your heads in the clouds. 

So, from a business point of view, “likability” is still desirable, but being less “likable” doesn’t always equate to being entirely undesirable.