Lighthouses

Sometimes, the journey of life feels like being on a little boat sailing on a choppy ocean. And then, when the ocean is choppiest and sky darkest, you may happen upon the beacon of a lighthouse. You may change direction. Or you may just use the light to get a sense of the landscape. Better still, much later on your journey, you remember a lighthouse from the past and use that memory to guide you in the present, for the better.

The lighthouses are giant, and to them you are insignificant. The lighthouses may not even know that you existed; or perhaps they saw you in passing and wished you Godspeed. But they had a profound influence on your journey; your path may have been very different if you hadn’t encountered that lighthouse.  

This week, I learned that two of the most influential lighthouses in my journey have been extinguished.

The first is Egon Balas. He taught me a few classes at CMU. What stays with me was the rigor and precision with which he approached the subjects he was teaching: this is something that stays with me to this day. More importantly, the story of his life is truly inspirational. For someone like me who is so mixed-up about faith, one of my anchors for doing the right thing is thinking about other people who did the right thing under incredibly difficult circumstances: Egon has been one such figure to me.

The second is Ted Gifford. I encountered him only twice in my life. The first was a meeting at CMU arranged by my advisor, and over the space of a conversation that was under an hour, he totally changed the direction of my dissertation (and career that followed). The second was several years later, at an academic conference: just a brief hallway chat. He was ever gracious, and my conversations with him stay with me today and continue to influence the direction of my work.

Rest in Peace, gentlemen. I am incredibly thankful for my encounters with you.

To be fair, I have been fortunate to have found relatively smooth waters: but that is due to the good fortune of many lighthouses, sailing partners, and launch pads. Some day, I hope to have the courage to thank some of these in person. Until then, to everyone who has helped steer and propel my little boat, thank you.

And ever joyful, they see it burn,

They wave their silent welcomes and farewells.

From “The Lighthouse”, by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow