Be The Light

"Darkness is merely the absence of light." - Marianne Williamson

My wife Kirsten and I were sound asleep in bed when a storm rolled through. It was the middle of the night and I vaguely remember the thunder and lightning, but I definitely remember the children coming into our room to climb into bed with us for comfort. If I am coherent enough, I typically try to carry them back to their own bed, though I must admit, a majority of the time I try to ignore their tentacle like appendages and the extra 1,000 degrees celsius they add to our bed and fall back asleep. 

This particular night I got up to carry one of the littles back to their room and by the time I stood up, I realized something was completely different than normal. Our room, the house, was completely pitch black. Not the typical modern household at nighttime dark where the main lights are off but there is subtle illumination from cable boxes, digital clocks, televisions, night lights, telephones, etc. I mean, dark as a cloudy, moonless, no light anywhere, kind of dark. 

And it freaked me out. I know how to semi-consciously navigate my home in a sleepy stupor at 3 a.m., but this level of darkness was disorienting. It was disturbing somewhere deep inside of me. I grabbed my phone and turned on its flashlight to help me clumsily carry my limp, asleep child back to their bed and return to my own warm spot next to Kirsten. But upon my return, I clicked off the light and lay there in the silence, contemplating the depth of the darkness that was enveloping me.

And even now, remembering that story, I am amazed at how powerful, how impactful, how helpful that small, subtle light on my phone was at that very moment. When I was disturbed, it provided me peace. When I was disoriented, it provided me context and direction. A small light piercing into the darkness. 

Sometimes the world we live in can feel that way. Dark. Deep. Disorienting. Even though it is the world we know, at times it can feel different and darker than other times. We experience this darkness ourselves and see it on the faces of those around us. The question is are we letting that darkness envelope us, consume us, and disorient us? Or are we pushing back against it and shining our light? Are we choosing to let our light shine and stand in contrast to the darkness within the world? To Choose Life we must be the light. 

What is intriguing is that I believe most people would answer yes to this question. Yes, I am being a light in a dark world. But to be courageously authentic and radically human, we must have the humility to look in the mirror and ask ourselves the tough questions about our life to ensure we are who we believe we are. Sometimes we even need to pose questions to those closest to us to find the true answers. If you have the courage to try, start with these.

Do I stand in clear contrast to the world around me?

One of the most defining qualities about light is that it stands in crystal clear, definitive and obvious contrast to the darkness around it. Contrast in photography is used to create clarity in the photograph. And if you are consistently being the light in a dark world, you will clearly be different than those around you. You will be counter cultural. You will clearly stand out from the crowd. 

This light can manifest itself in numerous ways. In a world that prioritizes possessions and has a willingness to go into debt to have them, you may choose a debt-free life, drive old beat up vehicles and play the disciplined, long financial game. In a hostile world that is comfortable berating another human because they have a different view than you, you may choose to consistently honor, while disagreeing, with those on the other side of a topic. In a medical community that all too often prioritizes profits over people, you may choose to make less but provide more for your patients, your employees and their families.

The more moving parts and complexities an organization has, the increased probability that mistakes will happen. As it is with most busy, large hospital systems and their billing departments. These departments consistently process thousands upon thousands of nuanced, detailed codes and price points, so it was not surprising a few years back when the ICT (pronounced “Ice Tea” and standing for our Inventory Control Team) at Habakkuk noticed one of our facilities had accidentally overpaid us on an implant from a Bipolar Hip surgery we had performed earlier in the month.

Our team promptly notified the facility, changed the pricing, and ensured the hospital received the funds in the return. They didn’t think twice about it and went on about their business. A few months after the episode I was at a meeting with a local surgeon who operated at said facility and the CEO of another hospital in town. The CEO was inquiring about our organization and the surgeon, before I could even begin to share about our team, piped in and said, “You will love working with their team. They are different. Not too long ago they actually returned money they were accidentally overpaid to another facility I work with.”

I was stunned for multiple reasons. One, I had no clue the surgeon even knew (came to learn later that the co-management group of physicians he was a member of had discussed it in a finance meeting the week before) and, two, that behavior was different than the norm. Seriously?

Those individuals in our team were light contrasting against the darkness. Simply, clearly, they stood out next to the world around them, by just being them. They were the light.

Can others see their own life more clearly after being near me?

Another quality of light is that it provides clarity to surroundings. It provides orientation when we are confused and unable to find our way in the dark. Just as I was able to find my way on that pitch black night the moment I turned on my flashlight, if we choose to be the light in a dark world, as other people are close to us they will begin to see their own life, calling and purpose more clearly. They will be able to see the pitfalls and challenges that surround them on life’s journey with greater clarity after interacting with you.

It isn’t that we define their life, journey or purpose for them, because that isn’t what light does. Light doesn’t define its surroundings. Light illuminates its surroundings. Just as a surgeon adjusts an OR light throughout a procedure to ensure it is providing the best clarity to treat a patient, that is what we should do for others in their lives. Do we talk about things of substance that challenge assumptions in others lives? Does our tone and pace leave people more lucid or disoriented in their life? Do we share our experiences, both wins and losses, to equip them on their journey?

One of the most, if not the most, important elements of being a leader is casting vision. Being a Purposeful Visionary is one of the most impactful disciplines of leadership effectiveness. People desperately need to follow a leader who consistently, patiently, and passionately casts vision for where the organization is going.

Notice I didn’t say the leader always says how they are going to get to the end vision. The best leaders allow their team to use their individual skills, experiences and perspectives to create the strategy to achieve the end state. But the leaders role is to constantly be clarifying the vision. This is being the light in leadership. Providing illumination on the potential obstacles and opportunities along the way. Constantly reminding the team why they are doing what they do, calling out behaviors that are counter to decisions the team has made and spotlighting where they are going together. All while trusting their team to achieve the destination differently than how they as the leader would. If we choose to be the light in a dark world, our life will provide clarity and vision to those we encounter and they will be better equipped to navigate their purposeful journey after encountering us.

Are people drawn to you?

The final quality of light is its near magnetic power to draw people out of the darkness and towards it. From the view of distant cities out an airplane window at 34,000 feet on a crystal clear black night, to a singular office being lit up at 2 a.m. in the sheer face of a skyscraper, our eyes are naturally drawn to light. We do not keep our focus on the vast darkness, rather we are drawn to the singular light starkly standing out. If you Choose Life, if you choose to be courageously authentic and radically human, if you choose to be the light and stand in contrast to the dark world around you, people will naturally be drawn to you.

The beauty of this quality within you is that it will often be undefinable. Others may try to explain why they want to be near you, and sometimes they explicitly know why, but often it is an undefinable “it” about someone. And don’t confuse this with charisma and gregariousness. Those are sometimes qualities of someone who has chosen a purpose focused, courageously authentic life and stands out as a light, but they are not exclusive. 

We recently interviewed a sales representative from another organization. Let’s call him Billy. Billy was a sharp, enthusiastic young man who was successful in his current role. He communicated multiple times that he enjoyed his job, liked the people he worked with and didn’t necessarily desire to leave his current employer. So I asked him why he was even interviewing with us?

One by one, he began to name the sales and service representatives within our organization that he had worked around and encountered. He listed them one by one, each by name, and then he said it. “I don’t know what it is, but there is just something about them. I just, I just want to be around them. So when I saw this position open, I knew I would regret it if I didn’t apply and pursue the opportunity to be with each of those people every day.”

“I don’t know what it is, but there is just something about them.”

Yes. That. When you Choose Life, when you choose to let your light consistently contrast against a dark world, people will inevitably be drawn to you. 

These questions are a great starting point to grow in awareness as to how bright your light is shining. Their purpose is not to beat ourselves up, rather to provide a genuine feedback loop to evaluate whether the life we are living is making the impact it was created to have. For as we Choose Life, as we live purpose driven, courageously authentic and radically human, we will stand in stark contrast to the culture around us. We will help illuminate others purposes and callings. And others will naturally be drawn to us.

But I would miss my own calling if I did not close by sharing that, in truth, none of us can be the light. Just as the moon can only reflect the sun’s light to brighten up a dark night, we too can only reflect the light of the Son into this dark world.

Choose Life.