Life's Script Is Written In Mysterious Ink.
For many of us, the beginning of a new year comes with the optimism of a fresh start. Millions will create resolutions to become better versions of themselves. A few years go I decided to adopt podcaster Tim Ferriss’s position and do away with making resolutions, opting instead for what he calls a PYR - Past Year Review. Tim finds these to be “more informed, valuable, and actionable than half-blindly looking forward with broad resolutions.” You can check out a quick, 6 minute episode about PYRs here.
It’s so much easier to look back with clarity than it is to look into the future. That being said… there are some things I’m really looking forward to this year - like graduating and finally getting my MFT license. There are also some things coming in 2024 that I’m dreading - like the November election and the fate of a dear friend who is in fragile health. As I sat down to write this week’s newsletter, the subject line for the email popped into my head. “Life’s script is written in mysterious ink.” It feels right for this moment in time. It suggests that, even in the face of uncertainty, there exists a certain inevitability to our paths.
At the start of 2020, in the early days of the pandemic, I was amused and somewhat comforted by repeating to myself the meme that says “When something goes wrong in your life, just yell PLOT TWIST and move on.” Now, nearly four years and a gazillion plot twists later, that meme doesn’t pack the same punch.
Earlier this week a friend who works at the Holocaust Memorial Museum in Washington DC posted something on Facebook that stuck with me. She was speaking with someone whose grandfather took photos in Buchenwald as part of a Congressional delegation that visited the camp in 1945 after liberation. She then emailed him a link to historic film footage from the museum’s collection the documented that same group and their tour of the camp. It was the first time the caller had ever seen moving footage of his grandfather.
She told him she loves the days when folks at the museum can connect the dots and reunite people with their family’s history. In reply, he wrote:
“As one of my mentors taught me: “We are where we should be.” You have placed yourself well. It must be awesome to wake up everyday and know you will be a blessing at some point in the week.”
In the grand narrative of life, the notion that "we are where we should be" invites us to consider the intricate interplay of choices, destiny, and circumstance that shape our individual journeys.
At first glance, the phrase may seem simplistic, but its depth unfolds in the layers of lived experiences. It's an acknowledgment that every twist and turn, every triumph and tribulation, contributes to the unique mosaic of our lives.
Embracing the idea that "we are where we should be" requires a willingness to surrender to the unfolding narrative, to trust that the currents of existence guide us to the shores where we are meant to stand.
When one is standing on the brink of a new year, this perspective not only offers solace in challenging times but also prompts us to reconsider our definitions of success and fulfillment.
The concept challenges us to view our journeys not as a series of random events but as a purposeful unfolding, with each chapter playing a vital role in shaping our character and destiny.
In embracing this outlook, we find a certain peace in the present, recognizing that, in the words of Peggy Noonan “the story is still being written, and we are precisely where we're supposed to be within its unfolding pages.”
Now on with this week’s Ohio EFT Newsletter:
For Happiness in 2024 Stop Overdoing Everything.
by?Julia DiGangi on January 8th, 2024
Overachieving and overthinking are ways we try to feel more secure, but this article points out that both can seriously hurt our mental and physical health.
Pilots Hide Mental Health Issues So They Don’t ‘Lose Their Wings’.
by Andrea Sachs on January 8th, 2024
A recent incident in which an off-duty Alaska Airlines pilot tried to take down a plane has pushed federal officials to address the flaws in their mental health system. This article details how grounded pilots face lengthy waits and expensive evaluations to get back in the cockpit.
Attachment And Adult Love
by Dr. Sue Johnson on January 8th, 2024
In the course of studying for the Marriage and Family Therapy national exam, I ran across a set of flashcards that mentioned The 10 Tenets of Attachment Theory. Things like “Attachment is an innate motivating force” and “The process of separation distress is predictable”. I was a bit confused, because this wasn’t something that I remember hearing during EFT Core Skills. I did a little digging and found this short video where Sue explains what they are. This short article is a great breakdown of the same 10 points.
Forget FOMO. Embrace JOMO To Discover The Joy Of Missing Out.
by Richard Sima on January 8th, 2024
What could be joyful about missing out on good times? The joy comes when we stop being so preoccupied with other people’s lives and start focusing on our own. This article explores a fascinating day a few years ago when a widespread social media outage forced many people to disconnect from Facebook, Instagram and their own obsessions with other people’s comings and goings. It was a natural social experiment, and scientists stepped in to measure the effects. What happened next surprised everyone.
Are You Fit For Your Age? Try This New Year’s Tune-Up To Find Out.
by Gretchen Reynolds on January 8th, 2024
Want to know if you’re as fit as most people your age?
The Washington Post asked top exercise experts for easy, D.I.Y. ways to test five of the most essential elements of fitness. These elements are noteworthy because each has been linked to longevity, meaning our?balance,?mobility,?grip strength,?stamina?and overall fitness could influence just how long and well we live. Here’s the link.
Ohio EFT’s Next Monthly Google Meet Video Call - Friday - January 26th @ 9:00am (EST)
by Ohio EFT on January 8th, 2024
Join us at 9:00am on the last Friday of the month for our continuing discussion about Emotionally Focused Therapy. We’ll be continuing with Stage 2 with Step 6 - Promote acceptance of the newly discovered tender and hidden parts, aspects of self and new ways of relating. I’ll have the link in the next edition of the newsletter.
Early Bird Pricing For The EFT Externship In Columbus Ends Next Week!
by Relationship Counseling of Ohio on January 8th, 2024
Relationship Counseling of Ohio is hosting an Emotionally Focused Therapy Externship in Central Ohio March 4th through 7th, 2024. ?Drs. Allison Fagan and Colby Srsic will be hosting this Westerville, OH event and Elana Katz, LCSW will be returning to conduct this training! This is a fantastic opportunity you won’t want to miss, and you can get early bird pricing if you sign up by January 15th. Click here to register. Got questions? Get answers at [email protected].
A Landmark Generation: Introducing Gen Alpha
by April Rubin on January 8th, 2024
It's the only generation born fully in the 21st century: the oldest are about 13, and the youngest will be born in the year ahead. Enter?Generation Alpha, the first entirely online cohort. Its members have grappled with a climate crisis and pandemic — and can spend money more easily at their age than even their savviest close elders. Read all about it here.
Just 4,000 Steps A Day May Be Enough To Prevent Alzheimer’s Disease
by David Merrel on January 8th, 2024
As few as 4,000 steps a day can maintain brain health and help prevent Alzheimer’s disease, a new study suggests. Researchers in the U.S. and Canada explain that simple exercises enhance critical brain regions involved in memory and learning, thereby reducing the risk of dementia.
Be A Fountain, Not A Drain: The Best Advice For The New Year.
by Melissa Kirsch on January 8th, 2024
There’s such fanfare about the end of the year and the beginning of a new one, but the difference is only a day. I find myself thinking about this a lot, how we invest the turning-over of a new year with such meaning, but it’s really just a Sunday into Monday, a transition we don’t dignify with ceremony the other 51 weeks. Still, when it kicks off, it’s momentous. Advice given on New Year’s takes on the air of a benediction, a strong first sentence with which to begin a new chapter. Here’s a great collection of the best words of advice for 2024 given to New York Times readers.
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