A Life You Want to Lead

In 2013, I found myself caught up in a whirlwind of commitments and responsibilities. Fresh out of college and I had just started my new job.? I was also planning a wedding, coaching soccer, and serving on the board of a non-profit organization. I was constantly pushing myself to the brink of exhaustion, unaware of how to slow down or ask for help.??

The Struggle of Asking for Help?

Asking for help felt like a blow to my ego.??

Why? Because to me, asking for help meant that I couldn't handle it. That I was weak. Undeserving. Unworthy.??

I would push myself until I couldn't go any further, then take a vacation to recharge, only to repeat the cycle all over again. It was a vicious pattern that I followed for two years. Add to the mix the addition of my first and my life became unsustainable and joyless.?

While I managed to maintain a facade of composure at work, my energy was short-lived. At home, my husband would witness the toll it was taking on me. I was constantly exhausted, easily irritated, and deeply unhappy.?

Realizing the Need for Change?

I pushed myself to such extremes because I believed working tirelessly was the key to success. An antiquated mindset to say the least. Unfortunately, the very actions I thought would lead to success were causing me to fail.??

I was operating under the assumption that I knew what I was doing, but the reality was that I didn't. This was not the life I wanted to lead; something had to change.?

So, I asked myself a simple question: What truly matters to me???

The answer was clear — my faith, my family, and serving others, in that order.?

Prioritizing What Matters?

The first step I took was to turn to my faith. My husband and I started attending church again, hoping to find direction. As my faith grew, I dismantled the walls of pride I had built over the years.??

While pride had driven me during difficult times in the past, it was now hindering my growth. I prayed for an open mind and an open heart as I sought counsel. Through meetings with some remarkable individuals at Daniel Stark, I developed a strong desire to learn and grow.?

I had to let go of preconceived notions shaped by my personal hardships, my culture, and the people I surrounded myself with. I realized just how much I still had to learn and change within myself.?

When I’m not investing time and energy in what matters to me — faith, family, and purpose — I'm not truly growing. More importantly, I'm not leading the life I want to live.?

Now, my life has dramatically transformed because of how I prioritize my time and energy.?

My husband and I now have two rambunctious boys who bring us endless joy and laughter. I have a fulfilling career at Daniel Stark, where I can serve others and make a difference. I continue to serve on the board of a non-profit organization that is dear to my heart. Despite how busy my life is, I carve out time to travel and grow spiritually.?

Of course, there are still chaotic days, but I've learned how to bounce back from those moments and get back to my three priorities.?

Lessons for Shaping the Life You Want?

Here are five lessons that have shaped my perspective on the life I want to lead:?

1. Be slow to respond, and quick to listen: There is power in staying silent and processing the information you're hearing before blurting out your thoughts and opinions. Listening to understand instead of listening to respond can lead to incredible learning experiences.?

1. Surround yourself with those who you aspire to be: Envision the person you want to become and seek out people who embody those qualities. Evaluate your close circle and determine if it consists of people who support your growth and help foster those desired qualities. If it doesn't, be prepared to make tough decisions.?

1. Your words matter: Your words have the power to inspire or debilitate others. It's an amazing gift we take for granted and a responsibility we often neglect. Your words reflect what's in your mind and heart, so choose them carefully and wisely.?

1. Brand yourself: Whether you know it or not, you are building a personal brand through your words, actions, appearance, and work ethic. What are you selling? Consider the message you are conveying and make sure it aligns with your values.?

1. Be intentional with your time and energy: We all have a finite amount of time and energy each day. To lead the life you desire, prioritize activities that align with your goals and purpose. Take control of your day, eliminate what doesn't bring significant returns, and focus on what leads you closer to the life you want.?

These five lessons have transformed the way that I live my life. I hope that they can help you as well.??

— Claudia Yanez , Director of Marketing and Sales?

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