Life Should Be Challenging
Olesya Luraschi
Empowering Leaders for Transformation & Success | Leadership & Executive Coach | Speaker & Psychology Lecturer | Startup Advisor
“When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not yet ready. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back.” –?Paulo Coelho
When did we decide that life should be easy and fun?
I mostly blame it on marketing and Instagram.
Although the idea that life should be a beautiful journey is nice. It is also causing much suffering.
Living in a space of constant ease is not how our minds work.
The mind will look for challenges and threats even in the most optimal environments.
This is why even tech billionaires and movie stars are unhappy.
For many centuries prior, humans believed life came with suffering. They tended to create meaning in that suffering.
They expected to suffer.
Although accepting suffering and not striving to alleviate it is not ideal either.
We seem to have swung too far the other way.
Now when you feel any negative emotion or small failure, you have a sense that something is going horribly wrong.
We have a cultural resistance toward challenges.
If it is not easy, then something is wrong with us.
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Yet, a well-known equation in psychology states:
Suffering = Pain + resistance
This equation aims to illustrate that although we cannot control the pain that enters our lives, we can control our resistance to it.
I believe we are creating more pain as a group with our collective mindset that life should be challenge free.
If we were to expect challenges as a part of a normal life, then we would have less resistance when they come.
Do not fall into the toxic positivity trap and think that others are having an easy time while you are constantly met with challenges.
Life is challenging. It is challenging for everyone.
Why? Because this is how the mind works. It will find challenges and things to improve upon, even in paradise.
Without this type of mental software, humans would not be able to constantly innovate and improve.
Although it does tend to make us fairly neurotic.
Embrace the challenge. The only way out is through—meaning the only way to an easier life is to increase your acceptance of the challenges you face.
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Experienced security professional managing AI in regulated environments
2 年Some of us find work and challenge fun. We are probably in the minority :)
Senior Technology Leader/Intrapreneur/Entrepreneur- Certified Scrum Product Owner? Certified ScrumMaster? CISCRP 6σ
2 年Suffering = Pain + resistance. Everyone has different ways to work through that. It could be just buckling down and embracing it, making notes and reflecting, storytelling or doing different rituals, such as participating in a group/community that provides a shoulder to lean on.