Life is a serene lake with a small boat

Serenity and peace is within oneself. Our attitude in life gives us peace and contentment. According to me peace and serenity is achieved by practicing 2 virtues. The first virtue is that thought, word and deed should be the same. This is the quality of a mahatma and quite difficult to cultivate in this materialistic world. But people who have cultivated this virtue are at peace with themselves and with people around. The second virtue is to not compete with another person but with oneself.

Most of our common trouble arises because we want the degree that someone has or the 3 bedroom flat in a posh locality that someone else has. If we start competing with others there is no end. There will always be someone better than us and some one worse than us, so it's a pointless exercise. As a method to achieve peace we need to flow like a gentle stream in life. We cannot control the problems that we face but we can certainly control our response to these problems. Everyday promise yourself that nobody and nothing can steal your peace for the day. These things have worked for me as I run our family enterprise of manufacturing patient handling equipment.

Find something that is meaningful to you and spend your time doing more of it. Focus on what you are grateful for in your life. Write it down. Spend as much time as you can with people who energise you, fascinate you and make you smile. Manage your expectations and be kind to yourself. Strive for constant improvement, not perfection. Don't compare yourself with others. We all have our own journeys, our own demons, and our own challenges. Comparison is pointless. Focus on becoming a better person than you were yesterday.

Make daily exercise part of your routine. Spend time by yourself in nature. Pay attention to what you eat. It's about balancing the “good" and the “bad". Give to others. There will always be others who need more help than you do. Be very mindful of your internal dialogue and what you choose to say to yourself. Words that are repeated create beliefs, values and habits. They, in turn, create your reality. Smile. What you focus on, you get more of. Regardless of what it is.

Many a times, children say the earnest things. You can remain serene regardless of what life throws at you. However, sometimes the best answers come from children. It’s adults that say contradictory things. For example, when parents quarrel all the time, their children said, “Why did both of you get married?” Then the parents would say something like, “You don’t understand.” Systems thinking suggest that most of our problems are inherent in living in crowded cities with people driven by ambition, greed and shopping addiction. By simply moving away from the big cities, most people will become more serene, healthier, more friendly and more green automatically without learning yoga or meditation.

In other words, when we use holistic and system thinking, we can design away specific problems. Our quality of life will improve automatically and we can attain serenity in our life with ease. You are human and have emotions, situations will get to you, life is messy. Serenity as a goal is worthless. So what’s the real problem? How does judging yourself for having negative thoughts? ( no-one judges themselves for joy, laughter, excitement, or love)

Though I?am currently embroiled in a tough personal struggle that will offer me much stress…I do not know the outcome, though for worst part I know that whether I fully or partially vanquish the challenge is not an issue because I fully embrace my reliance….I wake nearly like all other days with a 445am 2 hour predawn cardio walk as my joints ache I return with a beautiful fatigue…some walks are alone, some are the genesis of ideas for later action and scrutiny…..some are laden with chatter others some are in soliloquy….on return I meditate/chant for an hour…yoga-light….. And some personal hygiene….breakfast…….and then I start my day…the exercise and meditation set the stage to conquer my darkness (ignorance) my fears Each day is different as some days the challenges can overwhelm me….however “I train consistently” ……..if this sounds like serenity…..the framework is now yours…..shape it to your liking.

You probably learned this judging behavior as a kid - I did. Now you are an adult and can make and execute on different choices. Be delighted you have the range of emotions that allows crying, despair, and envy. That’s some powerful brain cells - a very high class problem. Try being delighted that you can emote. Just as you should be delighted to walk, taste, and feel touch. Serenity is earned. You would try to understand empathy, sympathize, and have a trustworthy connection to your intuition. Then through strength and steadfastness, you maintain a responsive serene state of being. Cheers!