The Life-Changing Lesson I Learned From an 80-year-old Brazilian Cook

I was barely 15 years old when my name was called over the loudspeakers at the youth camp in Jaboticabal, Brazil. Oh no. Was I in big trouble?

Frankly, I was confused about why I was being summoned in the middle of the day, but I soon found out: The Friday night’s banquet needed my help.

The menu for that week called for Brazilian Beef Stroganoff. Unlike the version we eat in the US made with either ground beef or a lesser cut of meat and noodles, the Brazilian version is quite different. It is made with filet mignon flambeed in cognac, folded into tomato cream sauce, mushrooms, hearts of palm, and drunken raisins (more cognac) served with rice.

?“I heard you know how to make this dish,” said the 80 year-old-cook before me. Her eyes were tired but kind. She stood only four and a half feet tall, but in her lifetime of cooking for public schools, she had feed tens of thousands.

I was puzzled by the question but answered politely, “Yes ma’am. I have made it a few times.”

“I have never made it. Would you teach me?” She asked.

?I was surprised and even a bit shocked to be asked by this fantastic cook (I had been eating her cooking three meals a day) to “teach” her how to cook something.

We worked on the list of ingredients, and she asked me to come over after lunch on Friday to cook.

Friday around 2, I reported for duty, not knowing what to expect. Well, the only reference I had was cooking with my Italian grandmother. She taught me to make gnocchi, fresh pasta, Bolognese sauce, and all kinds of wonderful dishes.

?But SHE was the teacher and made sure to critique my often poor technique.

?Something completely unexpected happened. This 80-year-old grandmother watched me intently, asked questions, and not once corrected me.

?Looking back, I made so many mistakes cooking that dish. My chopping skills were horrific, for one, and there were a dozen other things she could have corrected me on.

?But that day, I was the teacher, and she was the student.

?As we finished the dish and I was about to leave, she thanked me: “Thank you so much. Now I know how make stroganoff.”

?That moment was so pivotal in my life that I remember everything about it. The rain was hitting the tin roof of the dining hall hard as I walked out. The smell of fresh, wet dirt engulfed me as I opened the kitchen door.

?And one of the most profound thoughts I would ever have in my entire life came to my 15-year-old brain like a lightning bolt lost in that storm.

?I will never be too old to learn!?

?This principle has guided me for over 40 years now.

Often in a moment of weakness or laziness, I entertain the thought, “I’ve put in my dues. Let someone else learn this stuff.”

Then, I think back to that day at camp in Jaboticabal and remember that amazing woman who patiently learned something new from a kid in a kitchen she had commanded for over 60 years.

Learning new things is not always fun, especially when people half your age have figured out how to do something you are now struggling to understand.?

But in learning, confusion is followed by clarity.

In the past few years, I have deeply studied digital funnels and how to apply them in ministry, nonprofits, and churches. These funnels allow organizations to grow faster and at a fraction of the cost of previous strategies.

There is so much benefit in understanding and deploying growth digital funnels for my clients. And I love wrestling with new challenges (IOS privacy measures) and testing new strategies to help our clients succeed.

As you look at some of your current challenges, whether it’s fundraising, staff, volunteers, or donor acquisition, I would suggest asking the following questions:

Where can I go to learn? Who could help me grow to the next level??

Being curious and teachable will serve you for a lifetime. Victories are great, but they live in the past.

Finding a mentor or coach will help you grow faster, make fewer mistakes and become the go-to person anywhere at your current position and anywhere else you go.?