Life after a death

It's hard to believe how fast time flies but today marks exactly two years since my dad unexpectedly passed away. The whole situation was a shock to my family because the night it happened was like any other night. "Goodnight family" were the last words we heard from my dad as he headed up to bed. The next thing I knew, I was woken up in the middle of the night by my mum and my sister's frantic voices and we took it in turn to do chest compressions, with 999 on the other end of the phone calmly giving us instructions. If I'm being honest, the one thing that got my family and I through the whole experience was the peace that God placed within.

It is hard when you lose someone that you love, I don't know if the pain of loss ever truly subsides. Thoughts of "what would he think if he were still here?" pop up when I see certain things or I'm in certain situations, even now. I kind of like having those thoughts though because they make me remember him and I never want to forget my dad. My dad was truly an amazing man, an amazing father, an amazing husband, brother and son that impacted the lives of many in such a positive way. I'll always be eternally grateful to God for blessing me with the father he blessed me with, albeit for a short period of time.

One thing that this whole situation has taught me is that life is short. You hear people say it all the time but honestly it doesn't really hit home until something like this happens to you. When my dad died, I realised that I had to pursue my dreams. I had to! There's no way I can be on this earth and not live a life that makes me happy. Even if not for myself, there's no way I can have a dad like I had and live a mediocre life. My dad truly believed in me (and my sisters). He told me I will do great things and I believe him.

It may seem like memories like this put pressure on me to live up to my dad's expectations but I don't really think it's pressure. It feels more like a desire to see within myself and live out what he saw in me. Both him and my mum essentially planted seeds within my mind that I'm now watering and hoping will blossom in my lifetime. Seeds of greatness, seeds of success, seeds of passion and a sprinkling of banter.

To anyone that is currently grieving, the truth is, you'll never stop missing that person. You'll never stop wishing they were there when something funny or amazing happens. But what happens is, you get stronger and more resilient. You quickly realise that it's worth standing up for what you believe in and fighting for your dreams because as you know all too well...

life is too short for you to be mediocre.