Lies Hide

By Lindy Earl

When you were a teenager, and your parents asked where you were going on a weekend evening, if you were doing something good, then you were happy to tell the truth. The truth, good truth, likes to be told! If (when?) I do something positive, then I am all about sharing it.

Bad truths, however, often turn into lies. At the very least, we might get evasive about the whole truth. What if, back in the day, you were going out drinking with your friends? Is that a truth that you wanted to share with your parents? When caught doing something that you didn’t want to share in the first place, you also wanted to avoid any discussion of it.

Think about the times when you were caught doing something naughty, and you just wanted the conversation over. “Acknowledged,” you thought, “now can we JUST MOVE ON?” I have heard people say this and I’m sure I had my turns saying it. We didn’t want to discuss our mistakes, and we definitely didn’t want to face the lie we told.

But, lies are out there. There are so many ways to lie! You can share half a truth, and I learned, very young in life, that half a truth is a whole lie. You can call your fib a little while lie, but it remains a lie. You can varnish it and make it look pretty. You can justify your lie in that you were sparing someone’s feelings. They were all lies.

Sometimes the lies don’t wield their power for a while, maybe years. But the knowledge that the lie is out there will hold you captive. Yep, that lie is hiding, just waiting for the perfect time, maybe when it can do the most damage, to erupt.

What lies, or fibs, or fabrications, or half-truths, are you hiding? I have kept a secret for over thirty years. Thirty! Is it a secret or a lie? It depends on whom you ask. Some people will feel that they were lied to, even betrayed, if the secret is ever revealed.

What about the thought that lies don’t hurt people? Wrong. Lies hurt the person who is telling the lie, possibly more than anyone else. We all learned right from wrong as children. We were also taught to be our best. The two are incompatible. When you lie, you are not going to be completely happy with yourself. You might be moody the rest of the day, and even take out your stress on others around you. They didn’t lie, but they are being punished by your behavior.

Another thought – a second lie is easier to tell. That first one may have torn you up inside, but somehow, the second, then third, then more seem to slip out. I have heard people tell lies about things that don’t even matter. The more lies, the harder it is to hide them.

Some of the lies didn’t even matter! Do people lie just to see if they can fool someone? What a lame game that is. I knew a guy who would like about his age, just so he could say, “Ha, ha! Fooled you.” Lame. He would like about how bad traffic was, for the same silly joke. Lying was his humor, although it was rarely funny.

Lies take energy! You have to remember who you told what.

We all know that it is better to not lie, yet it happens. Some lies are accidental. Yes, you’ll attend the event – and then you don’t. The best way to handle it is to ‘fess up immediately, preferably before you are asked. Even lies of omission need to be addressed as soon as possible. Once we you learn about a falsehood, correct it.

We can say we’ll never lie again, but I think it’s like saying we’ll never speed again. Drivers speed.?It happens.

Just be aware, when you intentionally deceive, your lies always find you out.

But, let’s end on a good note, even though it goes against everything said. Please let me share a story about a lie that I heard years ago, that has a good ending. A widow woman with eight children was being pursued by a nice gentleman. This was back in the 1950s. My friend was not interested in him, and in order to get the gentleman caller to lose interest, my friend lied and told him that she had twelve children. He believed her and didn’t care. ?He continued to pursue her and she had to give him a second look. It would have been impossible to hide this lie for very long – “Um, excuse me. Where are your other four kids?”?Oops. Yes, she came clean before the wedding and they lived happily ever after, into their 80s. Please don’t follow her example.