Letter to my younger self

Dear Hanna,

What is dating?

Dating is an intentional and communicative process aimed at getting to know multiple people. Your journey in dating is rooted in self-love and self-respect, always aiming for relationships that honour your worth and integrity at every step.

Ethical Conduct: As you seek relationships that align with your values, always remember to treat both yourself and your dating partners with dignity and ethical respect. Your actions should be governed by a moral compass that ensures you're not only looking out for your interests but also respecting the autonomy and feelings of others.

By being deliberate, honest, and respectful, you align your emotional investment with relationships that truly resonate with you. From the get-go, you establish clear communication, creating a foundation for a respectful and enriching experience. While chemistry often serves as a compelling initial spark, it’s balanced with other indicators to gauge long-term compatibility.

Independence: As you journey through the dating landscape, it's crucial to maintain your independence and sense of self. While sharing your life with someone can be enriching, it shouldn't come at the expense of your individuality.

In the age of digital dating, your thoughtful approach extends online as well. Be as discerning on dating apps as you would be in person, using them as a tool to meet people who align with your values and goals.

Long-term Vision: Always keep in mind your ultimate relationship goal, whether that is a committed partnership, marriage, or another form of meaningful connection. This will guide your actions and choices, making the dating process more focused and intentional.

As you navigate this landscape, be alert to any red flags or early warning signs. Acknowledge them and consider their implications positively, taking them as opportunities to refine your choices and align closer with what you truly seek.

Honesty with Self: Authenticity is key. Be honest with yourself about what you're really looking for, not just what you think you should be seeking based on societal norms or external pressures.

Your journey focuses on quality conversations, a variety of fun activities and adventures, and enriching and memorable experiences. In the words of Helen Keller, “life should be a daring adventure, or nothing at all”.

Effective communication about your emotional needs is crucial, enriching your understanding and expression of your own desires in a meaningful way.

Maintaining a balanced life is key. Your holistic approach contributes to a healthier emotional state and enriches your interactions with potential partners.

Emotional intelligence is a cornerstone of this dating approach, enabling you to tune into your own feelings and engage thoughtfully with those of the people you’re dating. Both parties articulate and respect each other’s boundaries, thereby fostering an atmosphere of transparency and mutual respect. Included in this dialogue are comfort levels concerning physical intimacy and the pace of the relationship.

Personal growth is not just an added benefit but a primary objective. Self-reflection and adaptability are also vital elements. Your willingness to adapt enriches your experience and can lead to more meaningful connections over time. Embrace the diversity that dating offers.

Your support system is an indispensable part of a balanced and fulfilling dating experience. This network consists of your circle of friends and family, as well as a trusty dating coach if you choose to consult one. Together, they serve as your emotional backbone and greatest advocates. This collective wisdom empowers you to navigate the complexities of dating with confidence and clarity.

Remember that dating is a dynamic journey. Not every date will lead to an extraordinary relationship, and that’s okay. Let patience and resilience be your watchwords.

The ultimate aim is to forge experiences that help both you and your date understand if there’s a deeper connection. Transparency and respect are maintained throughout this process.

Always Be Interested. Be Interesting. Be Intentional?

With my best wishes,

Your future self.

Hanna