A Letter to My Younger Self
Dear tough guy,
I understand how it feels to live a life of loneliness, burdened by insecurities and plagued by self-doubt. You question whether you will ever make it or not. I know that you often feel completely lost because no one is there to give you a shoulder to lean on and help you move forward. You are in college, where you are exposed to so many new things, some of which you weren’t even aware of before. These things challenge your sense of identity, whether it is your career, hobbies, or interests. Being shy and introverted often makes you feel empty and directionless. You’re afraid of interacting with others because you worry about making a mistake, what if you do something unique and someone laughs at you? What if they criticize you, or worse, what if your loved ones abandon you because of something you did wrong? These types of thoughts bombard your mind, leading you into overthinking, which in turn prevents you from taking risks in life. You end up not trying new things, things that could help you discover your true self, your passions, and your interests. You have chosen to remain distant from others, living a life of mediocrity. But how long can you continue living this way? Imagine yourself five years later, still stuck in the same place, while your best friends are out there doing unique things, finding success, earning money, and building families. The contrast will only make you feel more insecure, and you might find yourself blaming your parents, your luck, or society. How long will you keep doing this? Don’t you think there is a need to adjust your attitude, to step out of your comfort zone? You have been spending too much time on unnecessary things, hoping that they will bring fulfillment, but they won’t. These distractions will make you nothing in the end.
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You are now an adult, no longer a kid who can depend on your parents to feed and care for you. You need to understand that your parents won’t live forever. They are getting older, their faces are wrinkling, their hair is turning grey, and they are crossing fifties. Your father will retire, and your mother, who once cooked for you without a second thought, may no longer be able to do so due to the wear and tear of aging. Have you ever wondered how they feel when they look at other children, who are succeeding, settling down, starting families, and taking care of their parents? How do you think they feel when they look at you, especially your mother, who carried you for nine months, endured the pain of childbirth, and nurtured you with care? All her sacrifices, all her dreams of you becoming successful, how does she feel when she sees you living the mediocre life, doing nothing, being no one? Do not let her sacrifices go to waste. It is time to take charge of your life. I understand that change is hard, especially for someone like you, someone who is shy, introverted, and struggles with self-doubt. But remember, the hardest change to make is often the one that will bring the greatest rewards in the end.
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Admiral William H. McRaven, once said during his famous commencement speech at the University of Texas in 2014, “If you want to change the world, start off by making your bed. If you make your bed every morning, you will have accomplished the first task of the day. It will give you a small sense of pride and it will encourage you to do another task and another and another. By the end of the day, that one task completed will have turned into many tasks completed.” Start accomplishing smaller tasks in your daily life, even though it is silly, because each one will build a sense of accomplishment. You will start feeling encouraged to do more tasks, and before you know it, you will be accomplishing more and more. Remember, no child learns to ride a bike as soon as they are born. It takes practice, persistence, and the willingness to try again after falling down till they learn. So, start take charge of your own life. Learn to take criticism, stop making excuses for your failures. Make your failures your teacher, because they will teach you things that no syllabus ever will. The more you fail, the more you learn, and the more you learn, the more you will grow in life. Whether it is in your job, business, studies, or sports, growth comes from pushing yourself beyond your comfort zone. Start coming out of your comfort zone and explore things around you. Invest your time in productive activities like reading, writing, learning new skills, and exercising. Whatever you choose, make sure it excites you. You can’t know your true self unless you try new things, take risks, and learn from your personal experience. It is through action and exploration that you will get to know who you truly are and what you love.
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Start writing a journal and mention what did you do today? What mistakes have you done and what did you learn from them? What good things have you done? What you will do tomorrow? This will track your progress. Learn from your mistakes and improve, so that your tomorrow is better than today. Stop hanging out with people, whether they are your friends or loved ones, who aren’t ambitious, as they will distract you and divert your focus from your goals. Always have good mentors, role models who have achieved a lot in their field. For instance, if you want to become a military officer, make sure to read the biographies of heroes who have served and succeeded in the military. Their experiences will guide you and inspire you to push you beyond your boundaries. It is better to learn from others mistakes, it will save your time, effort, and unnecessary struggles. By observing and understanding the challenges others have faced can help you avoid making the same mistakes and apply their insights to your own journey. This mindset will definitely help you grow faster and more efficiently. It’s about continuous learning and self-improvement.
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We always take small things like hobbies, interests or any other simple activities very lightly. It is very easy to dismiss them as distractions or, let’s say, a waste of time. It happens only when we feel overwhelmed by the burden of our responsibilities. We believe that success requires grand, life-changing decisions or actions. But what we do not realize is that these small, insignificant activities, which we take lightly, have the potential to change our lives in a way we can’t even imagine. Just think about it, what you do in your free time tells a lot about your interests, your passion, and ultimately, your potential. Hobbies are not just a way to pass the time, they show who you truly are. They allow you to explore different aspects of your personality and skills you might not use. Whether it is painting, playing an instrument, coding, or even something like cooking or hiking, every activity offers unique lessons and opportunities. Over time, these small activities can help you develop skills that contribute to achieving bigger goals in life. For instance, if you start reading books on topics you like, not only you will expand your knowledge, but you may also gain a deeper understanding of the world around you. Your interests might eventually lead you to new career paths or open doors to opportunities that you never considered before. Even something as simple as journaling or blogging can develop your writing skills and connect you with a community of like-minded individuals, potentially leading to collaborations, job offers, or even a new passion. What starts as a small interest, something you do for fun, can transform into something much bigger. These activities can shape your character, mindset, and life in profound ways. The key is to start taking these hobbies seriously. Invest time in them, explore them deeply, and allow them to shape you into the person you want to become. You might find that the things you once considered unimportant are actually the very things that drive your success in life. Think of hobbies as the foundation for a greater structure. They may seem like small building blocks, but when combined, they create a life full of passion, purpose, and achievements. So, embrace your hobbies, explore your interests, and invest time in what excites you. The more you do this, the more you will realize that these small things are actually big things in disguise. You just need to recognize their true potential and let them guide you to new heights.
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But to do this, you need courage. It is not something everyone can easily find within themselves, especially when the world around you feel so vast. We all have our fears and doubts. It is not so easy to leave our comfort zones and face the unknown. Change does not happen overnight. Courage is built little by little, day by day. It doesn’t come all at once. But it grows within you as you start achieving smaller tasks. These tasks may seem insignificant at first, but trust me they will serve as the foundation for something much bigger. When you start doing things, even if they’re small and simple, you begin to see progress. You begin to realize that you are capable, and that is what gives you the courage to take the next step. With each small victory, you will build your confidence. You begin to believe in yourself more, and with that belief comes the motivation to do even more. The first step is always the hardest, but it is the most important one. Once you take that step, you will find out that it becomes easier to take the next, and the next, until one day you realize you have accomplished so much more than you thought possible. A perfect way to start is by joining a club. It might seem like a small decision, but it can have a huge impact on your life. Find something that truly interests you, something that excites you. It does not matter if you do not know much about it yet, what matters is your willingness to learn and grow. Being part of a group or community that shares your interests can provide you with a sense of belonging. It can help you realize that you are not alone in your journey and that there are people who understand and support you. When you become a member of a club, it is not just about attending meetings or events. It is about actively engaging in activities, pushing yourself to take on new challenges, and learning from your experiences. You will find that each activity you participate in teaches you something valuable. Whether it is teamwork, leadership, communication, or simply learning how to manage your time better. These experiences shape you into a stronger person.
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But it is not just about joining any club, it is about truly becoming a part of it. Take initiative. Volunteer for roles that scare you a little. Maybe you will be asked to organize an event or speak in front of a group. These are the moments where courage is built. These are the moments that will push you past your fears and doubts, and showing you just how much you are capable of. It is easy to stay on the sidelines, watching others take the lead. But remember one thing, real growth happens when you put yourself out there, when you challenge yourself, and when you push through the discomfort. This is where you learn who you truly are. The key is to embrace the discomfort. Life is not about staying in the safety of what you already know. Life is about learning, evolving, and growing. Growth only happens when you step out of your comfort zone. The world is full of opportunities, but if you do not take the first step, you will never know what you are capable of. By getting involved and joining something that excites you, you are giving yourself the chance to discover new passions, new skills, and new perspectives. You are opening the door to a whole new world of possibilities. Each New experience you take on will teach you something valuable. Even if things do not always go perfectly, even if you make mistakes along the way, there is always something to learn. Mistakes are not failures; they are the opportunities for growth. Every time you stumble, you learn a little bit more about yourself and the world around you. You will find that you are stronger than you thought and more resilient than you ever imagined. Every lesson you learn, no matter how small, will help you on your journey to becoming the person you want to be. The courage you gain from these small steps will extend into other areas of your life. You will approach challenges with more confidence, determination, and a greater willingness to face the unknown. You will start to realize that the world is full of opportunities, and the more you will grow, the more you will see them. You will look back and see how far you have come and how much you have achieved, and you will be amazed at what you were once capable of. So, take the first step. Do not wait for the perfect moment, because it may never come. Join that club, sign up for that course, take on that new challenge. You do not have all the answers right now, just take action, and the answers will come. You will learn. You will grow. Most importantly, you will become the person you are meant to be.
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Do not overthink what you are doing by worrying about what others might say or think. What if people judge me? what if they make fun of me because I am doing something different? These thoughts can paralyze you and prevent you from taking the steps that lead to growth and success. The truth is, those who judge or mock you are often the ones who feel insecure about themselves. They may feel insignificant or incapable of do something different. Instead of working on their own growth, they focus on bringing others down. When someone tries to pull you down, it has more to do with their own fears and insecurities then it does with you. They feel threatened because your courage to step out of the ordinary reminds them of their own inability to do the same. Forget about doing, just thinking about it is a big deal, which is not something these people can handle. Rather than facing their own struggles and trying to improve, they take the shortcut route of criticizing others. They will say things like, “That’s not realistic,” or “You’re wasting your time.” But what they are really doing is projecting their own fears and failures onto you. They don’t believe they can do it, so they want you to believe the same about yourself. Remember one thing, every great person who has ever achieved something extraordinary faced criticism and self-doubt at some point. They were called daydreamers, unrealistic, or even foolish. But what if these famous people had let the fear of judgement stop them? They would have ended up living a mediocre life. So, the next time someone judges you, makes fun of you, or tells you that you can’t do something, remind yourself that their words don’t define your worth. Only you can define what you are capable of. Don’t let their doubts become your reality. Instead, let their negativity fuel your determination. It is just another piece of evidence that you are on the right path, one that they are too scared to take. You’re doing something unique, something bold, and that’s why it scares them. It is important to develop a strong mindset, one that is not easily swayed by the opinions of others. Ask yourself, “Am I living my life for myself or for others?” If you’re constantly trying to please everyone around you, you will never be able to live the life you truly want. You will always be stuck in a cycle of seeking approval, and that’s a trap. Approval is fleeting. One moment they might praise you, and the next, they might criticize you. Instead, focus on earning your own respect. At the end of the day, your opinion of yourself is what matters most.
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Take every criticism as an opportunity to learn and grow. Reflect on it. If there’s any truth in it, use it to improve. But if it is just baseless negativity, let it go. Don’t carry the weight of others’ words on your shoulders. Life is too short to be lived according to someone else’s expectations. Remember one thing, the people who truly matter, the ones who genuinely care about you, will support you, even if they don’t fully understand your vision. They’ll encourage you to keep going and celebrate your success with you. It is also important to remind yourself that being different is not a weakness, it is a strength. The world does not need more people who follow the crowd. It needs people brave enough to stand out. The unique thinkers, the risk-takers, and the dreamers are the ones who bring about change. So, embrace your uniqueness. Instead of worrying about standing out, focus on standing tall. Be proud of the fact that you are daring to do something others are too afraid to even try. Surround yourself with people who inspire you, who lift you up, and who believe in your true potential. These are the people who will remind you of your worth when you start doubting yourself. They’ll be your source of strength and encouragement. On the other hand, distance yourself from those who constantly bring negativity into your life. You don’t owe anyone an explanation for pursuing your dreams. Protect your peace and energy by setting boundaries with people who drain you emotionally. Most importantly, do not let the fear of failure stop you. Failure is not the opposite of success; it is a part of the journey toward it. Every time you stumble, you’re learning. Every mistake you make teaches you something valuable. Don’t let the fear of what others will say keep you from trying. Because at the end of the day, the only true failure is not trying at all. Imagine looking back at your life five years from now. Do you want to regret the chances you did not take because you were worried about being judged? Or do you want to look back with pride, knowing that you had the courage to chase your dreams, no matter what others said? The choice is yours. You have the power to write your own story, to shape your own future. Do not give that power to anyone else. In life, you will face many people who will try to bring you down. But remember one thing, their words are just noise. Do not let their opinions drown out your own voice. Stay true to yourself, stay focused on your goals, and keep moving forward. You are capable of amazing things, but only if you believe in yourself enough to give it a try. So, keep your head up, ignore the negativity, and keep working to be your best self.