A Letter to Future Me

I turned 50 on January 1st. I have been driving hard in my business and my partners for four years through real estate and industrial downturns, Pandemics, recessions, concessions, elections, and too many other "ions" that I have lost count. I thought of every one of those moments, "right around the corner. The next break is right around the corner."

Those "right around the corners" turned into months and then years. All of them are filled with good work, hard work, and trying to balance that very unique act in business - making money while keeping EVERYONE happy.

This week, all those "right around the corners" turned rapidly into "right now." The sheer volume of "WOW!" is a little staggering. Yet, amongst the (even faster pace!?!!) of "right now" and some well-earned high fives and pats on the back, I feel more reflective than forward facing. I mean, I KNOW what is going to happen next, I know what the outcomes are going to be, and I also know that there is SO MUCH MORE following right behind it.

So, instead, I'll look backwards. Share my private memories and thoughts while I make sense of the extreme good that is "right here, right now." (there is a song in there, somewhere)

I remember trying to cash a $78 dollar check(I Know...). I remember living out of our overdraft in our bank account. I remember three days to payday and deciding between milk and diapers(thanks to my family, it never came to that entirely). I remember my young son asking if he needed to call 911 while I had a heart attack on the treadmill. I remember being scared going in for a procedure on the aforementioned heart. I remember sitting at work with burning tears in my eyes while trying to contain my grief because one of my dearest family members had died, and I was afraid to take time off. I remember separating from my first wife. I remember living in the basement of my own home, knowing I would be nearly homeless soon as our inevitable breakup screeched into reality. I remember moving back into my parents' home in my thirties with young boys. I remember going on my first date (with my now wife!) and using my credit card because I didn't have enough money to pay for dinner. I remember two jobs and trying to keep my shared business afloat(my second real business failure). I remember making $700 dollars and praying it was enough to contribute to my new household. I remember not making a single dollar in income for 10 months throughout the ten years of being a coach. I remember the last time I tried to end my own life.

I also remember the first time my wife didn't check the bank account to ensure enough money. I remember going on vacation and paying for it all. I remember going out for a nice meal and never wondering where the money came from. When grown children call with one of their "life challenges," send them cash without thought. Giving a great team member a little extra because they were in need. Taking my whole team to a world-changing event. allowing my darling wife to take a whole summer away from work to recharge and return to being 'her'(I'm very fond of her. she smells nice and makes me smile). I remember being told I made someone's life remarkably better! I remember the hugs from my little girls. I remember doing the act of service, changing lives, creating opportunities, speaking at MIT & Harvard and STILL going home to my family whole.

This week, this delicious, insane, treasure-filled and chaotic week, with so many wins (and more to come! #blessed), attractive opportunities, outstanding partners, staff, clients, and soon-to-be clients, travel, and a rock of a household giving me the room to be my best, I say, "thank you."

You made me reflect on every challenge. A week like this taught me the value of one thing: every challenge faced is a lesson. Some are easier; others take more to bear. All prepare you for when Life is reasonably good. Recognize the challenging points. Embrace the opportunities. Celebrate when you do something good.

Someday, you will only be left with memories.

Are you willing to make them count?