Let's talk about the New Masculinity
GRAPHIC BY MICHELLE THOMPSON

Let's talk about the New Masculinity

The discussion about the attributed and expected behaviors of men has been alive for some time now. Men are expected to behave in accordance with the emotions that associated to them, and the social role of that masculinity in the patriarchal society.

After three months of intense work, Julian, in the middle of a meeting, could not hold back his tears when he was recognized by the Board of Directors. Two days later he called his boss to tell him that he was not feeling well – he ended up in the hospital for four days.

The boss, with some concern, told the general manager about this situation. Both decided to closely monitor their case, "with that emotionality, Julián may not be viable for the position, he will pop under the pressure. His skin is apparently too thin."

This is not a hypothetical story, it is a real life case. I was there. The tears, the hospital, and the hypothesis of management, happened and not so long ago.

We have constantly discussed, talked, debated and written about the worrying social dynamics of women, at work, and in society. Many feminist groups state that "women's things are not men's things." Without in any way taking away the immense merit and the immense relevance of the claim and defense of women in the social and labor field, today I invite you to see this issue from a different point of view, some may call it "the opposite vantage point". They are, however, the same issue, or they are intimately related.

The discussion about the attributed and expected behaviors of men has been alive for some time now. Men are expected to behave in accordance with the emotions that are associated to them, and the social role of that masculinity in the patriarcal society.

While this has been prevailing in our society, and it is clearly reflected at work; more and more men want to get rid of these labels. This happens for many reasons, I would like to underline two: ask for recognition of their authenticity, at par with women and other groups, and contribute to build a more egalitarian society.

For the small and insufficient, but relevant, social advancement of women, many working men have been displaced by the intention of hiring women for the sake of equality. This feeling is basic and reactionary. What has happened is that these "new men" have been finding ways to detach themselves from social and cultural patterns and show themselves to be empathetic, tender, compassionate, supportive: assuming the so-called "pink or rose skills" for themselves without shame.

Unlike many other phenomena that we have discussed here, this is one that is born from individuality and that gradually –especially since the studies led by Amnesty International– have acquired a more collective character. The "new masculinity" was born as a category and object of study.

To achieve a little more clarity about where we come from, and from we must depart: if a woman cries in the face of sadness, jumps with emotion, is tenderly moved by a baby, fixes herself more than necessary when she believes that she needs it, she is a "real woman". If a man does exactly the same, it is highly probable that he will be labeled "effeminate" or even homosexual, as if sexual orientation came with a set of mandatory emotions.

On the other hand, the male, for that same genitality, is saddled with a series of expected behaviors, all of them linked to force, rudeness and protection. Somehow the expected behavior of men is like that of kings, knights of the Middle Ages or the high command of the army. We must understand that this is deeply rooted and that there are very deep biases in our society that lead to stories like Julian's.

Today we are in the presence of phenomena of marginalized masculinity, one that in society and at work does not comply with the imposed paradigm and that classifies some individuals as "soft", "hypersensitive", or the most terrifying of all: "special". By failing to understand these new masculinities and trying to fit them into our inherited binary construction, that middle ground cannot be any different from a biased identification with sexual orientation, as stated before.

This “new masculinity” saw its first clearest manifestation in the home, when the distribution and balance of the roles regarding the care and formation of the children began. Until then, in general, it was a highly appreciated characteristic – except for the extreme macho ideology that created a false idea of subordination.

In the workplace, however, we are still a long way from getting there. We unconsciously demand masculinity in the roles, in job descriptions, in the treatment received and expected. This implies that emotionality, fragility and masculine compassion must remain in the closet to fulfill a masculine prototype.

This phenomenon of “new masculinity” should in no way be blended from with the advancement LGBTIQ+ groups at work. Curiously, in these groups –within the unacceptable discrimination– accept that the masculine can be more flexible.

Curiously, it is women who most expect this traditional masculinity and those who reject the “new”. According to studies by Amnesty International and the Frenchman Pierre Bordieu, this occurs because by overthrowing the emotional binary of gender, men have the right win to some of the battles that women have won. Paradoxical, to say the least.

This is a matter that has only been studied for a couple of decades, but that we have to begin to understand and manage in the business environment, but not under the concept of diversity, equity and inclusion, since it does not correspond to a category. It is rather about putting into practice one of the things that is most required today and that is the construction of emotionally safe spaces.

This is just an introduction to a debate that has given a lot to talk about, and that will break –and solve– many of the gender issues in the workplace.

We will understand that Julian's authenticity is what we must take care of and take advantage of, not stigmatize and cross out. We will understand not only that some men also cry and that they have “their days”, or that they are highly sensitive, but that everyone is like that and that hiding it implies a red flag against social, community and work harmony.


*A Spanish version of this article was published by the author in EL ECONOMISTA, México on March 2022.

要查看或添加评论,请登录

Juan Domínguez G.的更多文章

  • Diversidad, Equidad e Inclusión: ?la penúltima moda?

    Diversidad, Equidad e Inclusión: ?la penúltima moda?

    La reciente implementación de directrices federales en los Estados Unidos que buscan restringir o eliminar programas de…

    3 条评论
  • Tecnología y humanización: no es la cola la que mueve al perro

    Tecnología y humanización: no es la cola la que mueve al perro

    “Esa empresa es el futuro, su producto es único en el mercado”, dice con convicción el analista financiero, mientras…

    9 条评论
  • El nuevo humanismo en la publicidad: el giro a las emociones

    El nuevo humanismo en la publicidad: el giro a las emociones

    Durante muchísimos a?os, la publicidad se ha centrado en el producto, en ocasiones en el estatus que genera ese…

    8 条评论
  • La cultura de las emociones

    La cultura de las emociones

    Como todos los a?os, llega el momento de la retroalimentación, y le correspondió a Samuel la junta con su supervisora…

    4 条评论
  • El Bienestar en Empresas: Transformando la Cultura Laboral

    El Bienestar en Empresas: Transformando la Cultura Laboral

    En el dinámico panorama empresarial actual, el bienestar de los empleados ha emergido como un pilar fundamental para el…

    2 条评论
  • CQ -- Inteligencia Cultural, una nueva aproximación

    CQ -- Inteligencia Cultural, una nueva aproximación

    Desde que Daniel Goleman introdujo el concepto de inteligencia emocional (EQ) se complementó la medición de la…

    7 条评论
  • As from year to year: the invisible women

    As from year to year: the invisible women

    "Education sets you free, and that is the greatest act of rebellion that can be exercised" Eufrosina Cruz In March…

  • Talent and Market: the rules of the game

    Talent and Market: the rules of the game

    As we have already commented on several occasions, we are facing a highly changing, fragile, volatile and – above all –…

    1 条评论
  • As time goes by, what's next for 2023?

    As time goes by, what's next for 2023?

    All large consulting firms, before closing the year, present what they believe are the things that will be relevant for…

    2 条评论
  • THE MORE DIGITAL, THE MORE HUMAN

    THE MORE DIGITAL, THE MORE HUMAN

    More than 80% of entrepreneurship in the last two years has been digital, new, disruptive and changing. The big…

社区洞察

其他会员也浏览了