Let's Talk Mental Weed Clearing!
Karan Scott
Author ? Advanced Cognitive Behavioural Therapist ? Cognitive Analytical & Dialectical Behaviour Therapist ? NLP Practitioner ? Safeguarding & Welfare Advisor at The Bedford College Group
I had myself a minor teachable moment the other day. Not that I knew it immediately upon starting the task, but one which gradually dawned on me over time, and I thought I'd share it with you.
So, I have a block paving driveway and, because I haven't been taking the car out as much as I used to pre-pandemic, weeds were beginning to grow defiantly between the blocks. They were not quite as bad as the accompanying image would have you believe, but it wouldn't have taken much longer, and this was undesirable.
For the record, I am all for wild flowers and my local council has been nurturing wild flower sites in parks and on larger roundabouts etc, which are beautiful, but there's a time and a place for everything, and my drive isn't it. Please feel free to grow weeds on your own drive if you strongly disagree with me on this, and I'll celebrate your freedom of choice.
Now, I could have watered the entire drive with weed killer and have had done with the task in twenty minutes, but I'm not a fan of weed killers. Neither am I a fan of taking the easy route purely for the sake of expediency, especially when there are predictable (ecological) consequences or false time economies in play. I'm of the mind do a thing and do it well because at the end of the day, there are only two ways to do a thing: well or again, so...
DO A THING AND DO IT WELL
Rather than splosh weed killer on the whole drive, I bought a weed brush with a moss rake to mindfully remove the debris from between the blocks, as this was providing a cozy seedbed within which the weeds were thriving. I deliberately chose the road less travelled and opted for the more difficult and time consuming choice, specifically to do a proper and more through job. You see, weed killer would have killed the weeds, but it wouldn't have removed the environment in which future weeds could grow. Yes, you could reasonably argue a pressure washer would have spared me this labour, but I would cite my water conservation considerations in response. Besides, why must everything be time saving? I am lucky and thankful enough to have the physical capacity to do these tasks, so why not, in the name of use it or lose it?
Furthermore, I have a largely sedentary job and this got me out of the house and moving about on a lovely summer day, further beautifying my home environment; what's not to love? Well, it took forever and my back felt riotous by the end of it, that's what's not to love - but we can't go through life just doing what is easy and convenient, can we? Where would the growth be in that? By doing what is difficult and by making the hard choices, we strengthen ourselves; be it physically, mentally, emotionally and even spiritually. There is simply no growth without challenge. The universe has spoken. The end.
So where was my teachable moment in all of this? Well, after I'd been weed clearing for a while and my lower back was making its mutinous murmurings evermore err... shouty, I had begun to regret starting this task in the first place. What had I been thinking? Surely there were easier ways to clear the drive than this? Should I really be allowed to make decisions for myself again? But then the words of the late, great Jim Rohn came roaring inspirationally into my ear:
You cannot take the mild approach to weeds in your mental garden. You have got to hate the weeds enough to kill them. Weeds are not something you handle; weeds are something you devastate.
And there is was. Whilst I was physically removing the weeds from my drive, my conscious mind had been distracted by the mind-numbing practicalities of the task. This gave my unconscious mind time to partake in some mental weed clearing of its own, because by the time I was finished on the drive, my unconscious mind had gifted me an entirely new way of looking at an old problem. Something of an epiphany as it happens. It was like new light through old windows and it was positively illuminating. This made me smile gratefully.
IMPLEMENT. IMPLEMENT. IMPLEMENT.
So I had been presented with a fresh perspective and new mindset to adopt, but what mattered now was what I chose to do with it. For it to make a difference, for it to help improve the quality of my life, I had to implement it - I had to devastate the weeds (i.e.: my past mindset) and not look back. The alternative would have been to cling to my old mindset - better the devil I knew and all that - but that's akin to living with weeds, which is not for me. I don't do clutter (besides the obligatory 'Man Drawer'), be it physically, mentally, emotionally or even spiritually. Why? Because clutter blocks the flow of energy and, just like water, when energy becomes blocked it stagnates and eventually becomes toxic. So we all have to let go and remove what no longer serves us.
Now that I had been presented with a new, healthier clarity of mindset, I could see how ugly and weedy the old mindset had been. This made it so much easier to permanently rake out the old and stagnant, but mindfulness was still necessary to prevent slipping back into old patterns of thinking and behaviour. And I think this is what Jim Rohn meant by his quote; you can't handle or humour the old ways, you have to devastate them. You have to rip them out of their seedbed (i.e.: your comfort zone) and destroy them, decimate them; never entertaining them for a second again. You have to burn the damn bridge so you can't possibly cross it again.
If you were to entertain old patterns of thought and behaviour, even for a second, they are likely to take root and begin to grow again. Don't allow it. Implement the new and don't look back. If and when an old thought or behaviour pattern rouses itself in your consciousness, rake that ****er out! Take no prisoners. As determinedly as you would rake out a weed from your drive, you must rake out old, stagnant, unresourceful thought and behaviour patterns because they are a blight on the beautification of your life and environment (i.e.: home, body, career, relationship etc).
HOW MAY I HELP YOU?
Do you know where your mental weeds are? Do you know what they are, and how they suppress your quest for success? Have you gone so far as to rake out the weeds from their seedbeds, but still insist on carrying them around with you, for fear of letting go? Let me help you with that. The whole point of life coaching is to help you get more out of yourself and your life than you are currently getting on your own, so let's do this. I even have a Hit The Ground Running special offer to help you save money, just click the link.
Some people don't mind living with overgrown weeds and stagnation, and they are perfectly entitled to live and breathe as they see fit, but what about you? What do you think? How do you feel? How can I help you?
Karan x
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9 个月Karan, thanks for sharing!
Ajudo coaches, consultores, mentores e pequenos empresários. Juntos, criamos sistemas de vendas inteligentes. Diariamente, geramos potenciais clientes qualificados. Tudo isso com menos esfor?o e mais previsibilidade.
2 年Great, Karan :)
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4 年I can totally relate to this, physically clearing weeds for me creates a wonderful space to reflect and cleanse internal processes. Fortunately a big garden so lots of opportunity and bonus of physical activity to oil the joints. Thankyou Karan for this. ??