Lets Talk Baby Loss

March 2017 Written by Alex James 

This month we are focussing on baby loss – babies born still and those who died before birth. We’ll be interviewing supporting agencies and sharing stories and information with you.

Although it’s over 12 years since I wrote the book Living With Bereavement things have changed, but not dramatically,so we will be publishing the chapter on baby loss here.You can also download the entire book free of charge on this site.

Before I add the chapter on baby loss I d like to share a little bit of my own story.

I was four months pregnant, very excited , convinced I was having a girl, I had formed a tangible bond with my growing babe.It was shocking to be told at my scan that they couldn’t find a heart beat. I was completely devastated, I felt cheated. I had suddenly been removed from being an expectant happy mummy to a lost empty soul. I couldn’t word how I felt and those around me tried to placate me with words that just weren’t comforting.

There’ll be others

Maybe there was something wrong

It wasn’t meant to be

But there wouldn’t be another THAT baby, and it WAS a life, to me it was real and growing and I loved it. Then it was gone.

Some time later I had the twins but the pregnancy wasn’t easy I remember poking myself constantly to make them move, I had anxiety and I wasn’t completely confident until they were born.

Today I think we talk more about some aspects of bereavement but there’s still room for improvement and support can vary from area to area .Some clinicians still use language that feels harsh …. my baby loss was referred to as ‘ a missed abortion ‘.

We hope this month you’ll find our offering supportive and informative

If you’d like to share your story with us or if you need support please get in touch . Tania and I are here.

Alex

[email protected]

[email protected]

: Living With Bereavement – Baby Loss