Let’s Get Real About Chilling Out: Why Your Wine Ain’t Doing the Trick

Ever came home after a marathon day at work, poured yourself a glass of wine, and said to yourself, "Wow, I deserve this!"? The truth is, as my colleague Olivier always says “You don’t deserve a glass of wine, you just want it.” Because what you actually deserve, is something that truly relaxes you. The wine is kinda faking it. Booze actually hikes up the cortisol in our bodies, which is basically like inviting more stress to the party.

Or maybe you’ve daydreamed about escaping it all with a fat bank account or a long, luxurious vacay. Heck, I’ve been there, loudly agreeing with Instagram posts about needing a 3-month break and a million bucks to feel zen. But, let’s cut to the chase: that glass of wine, the dream vacation, or a lottery win might feel like your ticket to relaxation town, but they’re more like detours.

Why the Quick Fix is a Quick Flop

Turns out, the buzz from that vacation high dips faster than you’d think—research says the feel-good vibes from a two-week break barely last a month. And as much as I’d love to say a million bucks would solve all my problems, I know plenty of loaded people who are just as scattered as the rest of us. Our nervous system isn’t falling for these tricks.

The Real Deal: Parasympathetic Nervous System to the Rescue

What we really need is to get our parasympathetic nervous system (PNS) in on the action, all day, every day. Now, that’s a mouthful, but stick with me. The PNS is our body’s chill mode—it helps us relax and digest, balancing out the adrenaline-pumping fight or flight response from our sympathetic nervous system. Tapping into this can give us a deep, legit calm that feels like hitting the reset button on our stress levels.

Rituals Over Scroll-itis

So how do we switch on this chill mode? Spoiler alert: it’s not by vegging out on the couch with our phones, because, surprise, that can actually make us more wired. What we need are real, calming rituals that dial down the stress on a cellular level.

Take it from Jim Loehr’s research in "The Power of Full Engagement"—even top athletes have mastered the art of bouncing back fast, taking just 16 seconds to chill their heart rate between rounds. They’re not doing anything fancy; they’re just really good at hitting the pause button with quick, effective recovery techniques.

It’s Time for Some You-Time Rituals

What this means for us is finding those little moments in our day to bring our own heart rate down, to breathe deeply, and genuinely reset. This could be anything from a few mindful breaths, a brisk walk, a bit of stretching, or just stepping outside for some fresh air.

The trick is to make these chill moments a regular thing. They’re not just one-offs; they’re your new best friends. It’s about signaling to your body, “Hey, we’re cool, no lions chasing us, we can relax now.” And the more you do it, the better you get at switching from “I gotta fight this” mode to “I can breathe easy” mode.

One of my favorite recovery breaks is doing some Square Breathing. You can find the instructions here.

Wrap-Up: Let’s Get Serious About Chilling Out the Right Way

So, next time you think a glass of wine or daydreaming about an endless vacation is the answer to your stress, remember there’s a better way. It’s about nurturing those daily moments of peace that truly let our body and mind know it’s time to chill. Let’s aim for that deep, genuine calm—the kind that sticks around and changes the game on how we handle stress. Here’s to finding our own way to that chill life, one real, relaxing moment at a time. Cheers to that!

With SkillsGym Health, we organize Experience Days where HR- and wellbeing experts are welcome to discover more about how they can integrate evidence-based and easy wellbeing habits into their day-to-day. Go take a look at our website here. And for those wanting to get inspired about other recovery breaks, send me a message on LinkedIn and I'll send you the link to some extra resources.

Talk to you soon,

Sarah