Let Someone NOT Learn by Experiencing Your Experiences.

As a child I despised reading newspapers, and like every other parent, my father used to try hard for me to cultivate the habit of reading.

For this, he had various tricks up his sleeve; right from taking me for a bike ride where I would be in-charge of acceleration (every boy's dream - "speed") to praising me in front of our neighbors by saying, "Mottha zala ata, purna newspaper wachto" (He's grown up now, he reads the whole newspaper).

His favorite trick used to be telling me about some interesting news, esp. something related to my school, sports or some superstar that is published. Naturally I used to ask him to point out the page the news is published. For that, he used to mumble, "Find it for yourself!"

That used to be the most frustrating moment for me and I naturally used to retaliate "Why cant you just tell me where you read it?!?!' But however, used to end up going through the entire newspaper in a fit of rage to find that interesting bit of news. Now that my father has once read the entire newspaper, I wish I had the courage to ask him why he wouldn’t just save everyone’s time by showing me that particular news byte.

Now that I ponder over these incidents, I relate it to my workplace and ask myself, do we treat our colleagues in similar fashion? Do we treat colleagues in our teams or in cross-functional teams in the same fashion?

I believe my father was right in his intent and approach, only due to which I have been able to cultivate a reading habit, but, this being a Father - Son relationship there was never an iota of remorse, regret, or any other unhealthy emotion between us except for a little bit of frustration. We often do not have an luxury of having such relationships in a corporate environment.

Whenever a colleague expresses some doubt or a challenge he faces, I have often observed people dispersing only superficial information about that task and use delay tactics to “help” him figure out!!

"Khudse karega nahi to sikhega kaise?" (how will he learn if he doesn’t do it by himself?) being the favorite way to avoid helping in a true sense has been the excuse most of us give if confronted for not providing an obvious easy way out.

My message here would be to share freely and help generously to overcome problems as a team & trust me every person you help will reciprocate with the same gesture. Let someone not get frustrated or waste his time by trying to figure out what you have already have figured out by going through some tough times.

Don’t let them see the tough times, they do not have to learn everything only through experiences. Make your experiences count for which you may have not received any help from your peers or managers. Remember the difficult times you have faced just because someone else help important information from you and due to which you were able to gain this experience. Save crucial time and help your colleagues derive results; maybe through you, let them take the credit. Share what you learned through the experience. Ensure they understand what not to do.

Maybe you have gained some insight only after toiling through a process for half a decade, share those learnings with others. Let them not toil for another half a decade to receive the same insight which they could receive TODAY. From YOU!!

Imagine the impact you could have made if you knew the same thing 5 years back. Imagine the impact your colleague can make with the same insight in the next 5 years. Don’t deprive others of your experience.

Share your experiences in such a way that it becomes easy for others to benefit immediately from them; not by allowing them to go through the entire process again.

By letting others take credit for what they’ve done you explore avenues different & more original that what has been done before and that is how you progress, that is how you develop.

You develop only by letting other people develop.

Mutually. Sustainably. Holistically.

#empathy #gratitude #fast_paced_learning_environment #culture