Lessons Learned the Hard Way

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Here’s something you may already know. I didn’t until recently, but I sure do now and it’s a lesson I won’t forget. Something I wish I’d known three weeks ago.

Rabbits LOVE cone flowers.

We recently downsized to a cute house with window boxes. I’ve never had window boxes before and am honestly not much of a gardener. I went to the local place where we buy plants and picked out some tall red ones and some shorter purple ones and even shorter yellow ones. (Don’t ask me the names, I threw out the labels, and as I said, am not much of a gardener.)

As I filled the boxes, I realized the red ones were too tall, so I decided to plant them in the ground in front of the house. It wasn’t easy, what with the rocky soil and roots from nearby bushes, and did I mention it was 84 degrees out? But I got two red ones into the ground.

Having just two looked skimpy, so the next morning I made another trip to the plant store, and bought two more of what I learned were cone flowers, or echinacea. Another hot day, more rocks, more roots but wow, did the four red cone flowers look nice once I finished. Our new home had color and a real step up in curb appeal. I was so proud!

Devastation hit the next morning. As I went out for an early morning jog, I was dismayed to see broken-off stalks and red petals scattered on the ground. My beautiful cone flowers! My curb appeal! Those cute little bunnies we’d seen scampering through our backyard suddenly didn’t seem so adorable.

It’s a lesson I could have learned elsewhere (perhaps a gardening book or website) but instead learned the hard way. Sometimes life is like that.

Here’s another lesson I learned the hard way: the key to a sustainable career is intentional self-care. Self-sacrifice and overwork may help you achieve in the short term but they will eventually catch up with you. For me, it was job burnout with no clue about how to prevent a recurrence. It was a derailing of the career in clinical medicine that I had hoped, planned, and worked for.

In the many years since, I’ve learned a lot about what leads to burnout and what staves it off. I’ve learned that job burnout is driven by excess stress in the workplace but also that individuals play a big role in their well-being. Both are true.

Intentional self-care is more than a monthly massage or facial—it’s learning how to set healthy boundaries at work, say no to extra tasks and energy drainers, and advocate for yourself. It is making and keeping a commitment to yourself to create space for truly recharging.

Where might you adopt intentional self-care and avoid learning a lesson about career longevity the hard way? If you’d like some specific first steps, let’s find a good time to talk!